Burst At Your Terrible Boss, And Save The Planet

We all mostly have terrible bosses, and we all crave to pay them excessive amounts of unnecessary respect and turn our cheeks on utterly the most inhumane treatments that scar us all the way throughout the whole career.

We hate our bosses because they are horribly inflated by an extreme superiority complex disorder, they curb your ideas from getting visualized, they exaggerate at WIWHD (What I Would Have Done), and they have zero appreciation of how hard you tried to impress them, but bear with consequences letting them do any thing for you. I hear stories about people who jump off bridges and commit murders for that bosses’ unfairness was the main element in all of them. I am not saying that I would have made a better boss, but I am sure that I can at least be somebody that my subordinates can trust. So, for my own amusement and for sake of having my frustration being flooded into the right place, I wrote my boss a letter. So, my terrible boss, here I come…

Dear Evil-Spirited Boss,

It has been conspicuously noticed that you have been a dick with me all along the years I have worked with you. For these inexorably bitter years that I had suffered working under you, I do not really want to be aware of what caused you to turn out to be this awful. Maybe you had daddy issues, menopausal dilemmas, or for having been molested by the life-time jail convicts you spent your prison time with, if so, they picked the wrong person, and if not, then you should be in jail, or a medical quarantine ASAP. It would be soon until you see a doctor who would be honored with a noble for bestowing this huge favor to the humanity by alluring you to a fake appendix removal. Who the hell cares? I am just crawling my words to get to the point of that you should have never existed.

It does feel so shameful that we share the oxygen that supplies my lungs simultaneously with yours, eww, right? It actually kills me to have you in a world meant for peace, for that you are absorbing the beauty of nature and quickly turn it into a deadly venom, and breathe it onto my lovely face. What the hell is the matter with you? I thought you were a dick all the time, but you keep impressing me everyday by evolving into a complete different worse dick. The solar system has so many planets, go to Venus, they detect so many forms of life in that planet, go there, and I really hope all what we have heard become false and you would choke to death.

I have always wanted to sneak behind you while you were at the urinal, and make you retch due to my belt fastened around your neck. Every time it occurs to me, I happen to not to be wearing a belt. I truly admire your loyalty to urge your presence next to your morning cup of tea, it tires the blood out of my veins to go around the printer and pretend to collect papers that are not mine while I had very sincere intentions to spit in your cup and watch you drink my spit from behind my cubicle.

I die for the smirk on my face when you are in trouble, and strive for the moment you are being scolded at by our customer, and whomever can do so. The only reason I like the person you are is that I get to structure my acting and sense of humor skills by imitating you and get eargasms for everyone’s faithful laughter.

In conclusion, I deeply wish you a terrible end, and an eternal back bend. I hope you would by time realize and fix the broken scattered pieces inside you and treat people -not limited to your subordinates- in a way proves suitability of any human qualified for this position right after you fall in a deep well, and a tragic car accident.

Yours unfaithfully,