Things Have Been Getting Pretty Silly in Westeros Lately
I totally get that most people love watching the majesty and spectacle of a grand cinematic-style fantasy universe deployed on television.
Heck, most friends and family fans I have talked to since last week didn’t even notice the recent (very obvious) ‘Day In The Life” sized plot holes opening up all over Westeros.
And yes, I also get that showrunners Benioff and Weiss are trying to compress what will eventually be about 2000 pages of dense George RR Martin text into about 12 episodes (over two years), but things are getting a little silly (and even a bit insulting) in the recent Game of Thrones Universe.
Euron’s Magic Powers
So, Daenerys split her forces, sending the Dornish forces to join with the forces of The Reach in encircling King’s Landing and she sent the Unsullied to Casterly Rock to capture the traditional seat of Lannister power.
Somehow, Euron Greyjoy was able to defeat the other half of the Iron Islander navy (buttressed by the full forces of Dorne), return to King’s Landing with prisoners, and get all the way to Casterly Rock in time to cut-off the Unsullied’s return trip to Dragonstone.
Under normal circumstances, this would require the ability to teleport but he accomplished all of this without needing to get repairs in port or resupply his ships. Even with teleportation powers, this would be unlikely.
I mean I could go further (to how he created the 1000 ship navy in like five minutes, mustered the forces to man the ships, and knew exactly how to find Yara’s fleet without being detected).
I guess he really is the Master of the 14 Seas.
So, Olenna Tyrell has survived longer than almost any other player in the Game of Thrones but I guess her survival turns out to have been more about being lucky than good?
Last I checked, for Tyrion’s plan to work, Olenna’s forces were to have been encamped near King’s Landing and not chilling out in the Reach (chilling and relaxing and totally demobilized in Highgarden).
In the time it took for Euron to defeat Yara and return to King’s Landing we are supposed to believe The Tyrell’s entire force left their encampments near King’s Landing and entirely returned home.
And, beyond this, despite it being a time of war, they decided to have no scouts and seemingly no plan for defending either The Reach or Highgarden?
This is where things get exciting, Olenna’s only explanation for all of this was something about how the Tyrell forces were never very good at fighting.
Come on? Seriously?
One of the most legendary characters, a Machiavellian Master of the Game, got taken out in a totally unexpected sneak attack on her own lands and nobody even said boo.
Wake up folks, so far, this season has made NO sense. Bet you a billion dollars (assuming I had several billion dollars) that when George R.R. Martin’s books come out, they aren’t this sloppy or ill conceived.
Those White Walkers are Really Polite for Harbingers of Apocalypse!
It has been very considerate of the Night King to wait until Jon Snow gets his mining operation rolling on Dragonstone before attacking the Wall.
Winter started, in the last two seasons, we saw the forces of The Night King mass at Hardhome and also beyond the Wall at the Cave of the Three Eyed Raven (not far from the wall). In fact, it appeared that they actually could teleport (The Night King saw Bran during one of his Greenseeing expeditions and used that information to locate and almost immediately attack Bran, Hodor, The Children of the Forest, and the Three Eyed Raven).
So, what exactly are they waiting for? Do they just like marching around with zombie giants around the wastes on the other side of the wall? Or are they really just trying want to give the forces of humanity a fighting chance?
Said it once, will say it again, Tyrion was master of coin when the Lannister’s found out that Casterly Rock’s gold mines were depleted.
When was the last time you saw even one Lannister in Casterly Rock ever (Jaime was exiled there at one point but the physical Casterly Rock castle has never even been shown on Game of Thrones until last week)?
Why would Tyrion risk 10,000 of his best forces to take a city that he knows is worthless and that he 100% knows that Cersei could care less about?
Why would the Lannister’s have stationed 10,000 troops at Casterly Rock when they know that King’s Landing was about to be attacked?
Yes, I know that they moved the troops from Casterly Rock to The Reach, but why were they there in the first place.
And why would Tyrion insist on an assault (certain to cost the lives of a HUGE number of Unsullied) instead of just starving the city out? You know, the same thing he planned for King’s Landing?
And why is it okay to kill everyone in Casterly Rock using foreigners but not okay to do it in King’s Landing?
I am sure in a few weeks we will see thousands of Unsullied massing against the Lannister forces in some great battle, do me a favor and remember back to where taking Casterly Rock seemed to cost all but about five Unsullied and the rest of Daenerys navy.
Maybe when it comes to Benioff and Weiss, consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds?
** This could be easily misread, I am saying maybe my insistence on consistency is problematic, I was not insulting them directly **
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