Positive Experiences This Year in France
I have felt my existence threatened in France this year, and most of my writing has been about how palpable that hatred, misogyny, all that alienation and negativity is, how tired I am of being bullied and heckled and taken advantage of. Anyway, though, I did have some positive experiences and will write about them.
- Work. I loved work. Work was my temple. Work was the place where incredible things would happen every day. Work was teaching and work was where I let my students teach me new things every day. Work was where I got to feed the brains of my students as much as was humanly possible. It was absolutely exhausting, because their brains were ravenous, and sometimes each kid would want all my attention at once because they COULD NOT WAIT THEIR BRAINS WERE THAT HUNGRY AND THEY NEEDED TO BE FED THEN RIGHT AWAY BEFORE THE REST OF THE CLASS AND PLEASE COULD I FEED THEIR BRAIN IMMEDIATELY. Please wait. I would say. NO MY BRAIN CAN’T WAIT IT’S HUNGRY NOW. NOW NOW NOW. NOW! MY BRAIN IS HUNGRY NOW. I couldn’t feed all their brains all they wanted all at once.
- Once, I let my kids teach me about why Black History Month was important. I had been teaching them about it and the month was nearing a close. I wanted to make sure they understood everything I had taught them. I asked them if Martin Luther King Jr. rang a bell. He did. They were shocked and appalled as only kids can be about injustices. White kids and black kids couldn’t play on the playground together? These kids were furious about the injustice of it all, and the historical phenomena buttressing racism that we had talked about. What was so refreshing about teaching Black History Month is that my kids delved into conversations about race with this urgency and sincerity that was truly heart-rending. They were so aware and able to express their desire to live in a more just society, it was probably the most touching experience of my life. But what was most important to me is that my students wanted to learn about Black History Month. As it stands, there is no Black History Month in France, no Women’s History Month and so on. Being a white person I did not feel the most qualified to teach it. I did not want to make a fool of myself, and I had already been bullied a lot by teachers in Paris. When I started teaching Black History Month in one class, the teacher took me aside afterwards and said “they didn’t understand anything, they’re babies,” and that school always turned in my hours months late (there was always a long delay to be paid for my work), so I wonder if they were just really opposed to me teaching Black History Month. Anyway though, the kids really wanted to learn and talk about it, and my conclusion is that they felt they needed to. Almost as if it was important to the survival of the human race. One of the things that was so cool is that all the kids wanted the coloring page that said “Equality,” and also realizing that some of them were young enough that they didn’t even distinguish race yet.
3. What I loved most about the experience of teaching Black History Month in France though was seeing the black students in my classes proud of being black. I am really not sure that as it stands the curriculum of the French education system could ever make them feel that way, and sometimes I would really chafe at how obvious it seemed that children of color simply do not fit the “ideal” of French nationalism qua white supremacy.
4. To be perfectly honest, it was the greatest intellectual adventure of my life to be able to say to my students, listen to this wonderful music. Soul, Funk, Rock n’ Roll, R&B, Pop, Hip Hop, Gospel, Jazz, the influences of black musicians, black culture, black talent makes all of these genres great. They all have one thing in common I explained to my classes. All of these forms of music were heavily inspired by black people. I don’t know what is more intellectually exciting besides telling the truth.
5. To be continued…
