US/FRANCE definitions of success

I found my way into a vintage shop today in the greatest flea market on the planet, attracted by a colorful floral jacket. I try it on and it’s perfect. I decide to buy myself a first Christmas present, though it is already December 28th. What is at work?

Before December 25th I feted solstice with an incredible celebration that included an idea for a give away clothing exchange. It all exceeded my wildest imaginings, and I found many things I truly need (sheets, gloves, etc). A friend also came bearing gifts yesterday, more home essentials I was lacking that I today supplemented at the puces.

Anyway, I started shooting the shit with the locals and the vintage store boss. We talk about different places, how Texas is its own country, New York is a game of roulette and so on. Finally, one of them says, you know the difference between success in New York and here? he continues In New York, people are happy if you’re successful, in France, as soon as things start to go well for you, people will try to drown you, you emerge your head above water, they’re gonna push you down below.

His words struck a chord. This past semester I finally have a job I love, finally succeeded in registering for a Masters program and that gesture, the violent wrenching one down to the bottom, I have lived it innumerable times these past months in Paris. It is the only possible way to describe my experience here. Except that I know a few people who have kindly helped and protected me at different intervals. Without them I would have surely drowned, as the jealous intended.