The Toad King and the Beauty

Amanda was walking out of the elevator cabin when a stranger male abruptly stepped in front of her, kissed her on the lips and grabbed her genitalia. She was overwhelmed with anger and disgust. The man stared at Amanda blatantly with his small piggy eyes on a creepy face that resembled a snout of a toad. She pushed him with her fists in his chest and rushed away with cheeks burning from anger and shame.

It happened more than a decade ago but she again was so much dazed by that unbearable mix of anxiety, anger, shame and disgust that tears came to her eyes. She just saw that same toad on VR TV. He was running for the King’s office.

By the time when she calmed down she had the ‘A’ plan. She rang up her old friend prominent neuroscientist Naomi and talked to her for a couple of hours. Then she called a driverless car that took her to her lab. She pulled over at Starbucks to pick up some coffee and sandwiches. She had a long night ahead.

By six o’clock in the morning Amanda had added all required cell lines into the Crispr cocktail that she named the Youth Elixir. The result of the last decade of her work was ready with some subtle tweaks made by her overnight.

It was time to conduct a field testing of the brand new genetic weapon of the female beauty. Amanda met Naomi and their third friend Carla in their favorite bar to celebrate her success. She poured by a droplet of pearly liquid from a crystal flacon into each of their champagne glasses before proposing the first toast. “To eternal youth!” She said raising her glass. “And protection.” She added after a short pause.

Amanda told Carla the story of her old intercourse with the pussy grabbing candidate to the King’s post. Carla remembered a similar story with her former boss. Naomi too had a story to tell. They’ve became a bit drunk and too loud by midnight.

“Grabbing a woman’s genitals without her consent sounds like sexual assault.” A middle aged colourless woman looking tired and older than her age came across their table with a half empty glass in her hand. She was swaying slightly. “May I sit with you for a minute?” She sat down without waiting for an answer and put her glass to the table. “I am working with the candidate you’d mentioned for his entire campaign and he never allowed himself any groping in my respect.”

“What is your name, sweetheart?” Carla looked at the woman with a pity. “Agnes.” The woman responded. “Have a drink with us, Agnes!” Carla winked to Amanda and Amanda covertly poured a drop of pearly liquid into Agnes’s wine glass. “Listen, sweetheart, what he used to say, when he was a reality show star!” Carla tapped ‘play’ button on her smartphone screen and made the sound louder.

“I’m automatically attracted to beautiful women — I just start kissing them. They are like magnets. Just grab them by the pussy. Don’t wait for consent. When you’re a star you can do anything … . You can do anything.”

“I don’t believe he said that. It’s a fake.” Agness said after a hiccup. “I’d better go now. Nice seeing you gals.” When she finally went out of the bar’s door maneuvering like a ship with a rookie captain, Amanda, Carla and Naomi burst out laughing. “Naughty you!” Amanda told to Carla in between bursts of laughter. “We should have warned the poor gal.” Carla replied with a giggle. “Imagine her looking in a mirror tomorrow. She will be the happiest gal in the world. Real dudette.” Naomi moved her face closer to Carla’s. “Look, dudette, your wrinkles around eyes just vanished!’ Carla had a closer look at Naomi’s face. “Yours vanished too. It’s working!”

Amanda leaned back in her armchair. She felt happy and relaxed. “Soon we’ll feel safe too.”


Agnes got up early in the morning without a slightest sign of hangover. She was already pleasantly surprised when she went to the bathroom. There she saw her reflection in the mirror and couldn’t recognize herself. It was the reflection of a young attractive woman which she never was. Silky smooth skin was as if lit from within, naturally puffy pink lips were parted invitingly, eyes shone brightly from under lush lashes. She let her bathrobe slip from her shoulders and to the floor. Her figure tightened and became slimmer. No sign of cellulite was left on thighs. Breasts were standing as brave soldiers.

“It’s a kind of magic. Who did this miracle to me? Thank you, my Lord!” Her thoughts were mixing up again and again with each step when she walked half dancing to the candidate’s office this morning. She felt like flying. She was young. She was beautiful. She felt noble. She smiled to everyone she met on her way so happily that even the gloomiest colleagues smiled in return cheerfully.

The King candidate entered the open space of the office right after Agnes. He watched her walking from behind with an eye of a true connoisseur. Agnes took a pair of folders from her desk and went to the candidate’s cubicle. She leaned over the large candidate’s desk to put the folders right in front of his chair. At this moment she suddenly felt a hand grabbing her from behind between her thighs. She jumped aside with a sound resembling the mouse squeak holding the folders in front of her as a kind of shield. The door of the cubicle was closed. Blinds inside the inner glass walls were shut. The candidate approached her with a lusty smile. He moved the folders down with his fingers and kissed paralyzed Agnes on the lips.

Agnes shut her eyes tightly. She felt disgust, fear, shame and anger at the same time. “What? What is that?!” She heard a scared shouting of the candidate and slowly opened her eyes. The candidate stood in front of her with his both hands raised to the eyes. Something was terribly wrong with his hands: they looked as if they were all covered with dirty green bubbles. The candidate lowered his hands down. His face and neck were everywhere covered with dirty green bubbles and brown warts. He looked like a huge toad in silver suit, white shirt and dark red tie. “What did you do with me, witch!” He groaned looking at Agnes. She spotted tears in his piggy eyes, but she felt no pity. Somebody opened the door from the outside attracted by the moans of the candidate and gave a cry of fear. Agnes burst out laughing.


The candidate had to withdraw from the race for the Kingdom due to the rare genetic disorder that developed in him abruptly. He was the first known human who got it. Somehow genes of anuran replaced some human genes in his DNA. It looked like somebody accurately edited the DNA of the candidate with Crispr technology. The candidate demanded to edit his DNA back to normal but scientists assured him that there is no scientifically proven method to edit DNA of an adult person. They also claimed that it will take many decades of reverse engineering to find out how to edit back his genes even if the method to do it existed. If somebody really edited the genes of the candidate, then only that person would be able to bring the candidate back to normal.

Then the day came when Amanda’s Youth Elixir came on sale over the internet. It guaranteed to women of all ages that they will look and feel young again with the lifetime lasting effect. The manufacturer tried to avoid the word genetic in product promotion materials. After all the Elixir was marketed as a purely cosmetic product. It was packed in a fancy crystal flacon with a scarlet letter A on the top of its cork.

However there was a warning in small font that the elixir may cause genetic damage in a male if the male will cause a woman who took it to feel disgust during physical contact with this male. The skin of forever young women under such circumstances started to secrete plasmids, which altered the male DNA upon inhaling. Women who saw the effect the Elixir had on the women, who already took it, didn’t bother to read small font.

Several cases of toad turned pussy grabbers were reported over the following weeks. Then the first innocent victim emerged. A 72 years old billionaire turned into a toad when he tried to have sex with his eighteen years old model wife who claimed that she loved her husband more than life and under no circumstances could feel disgust when he climbed on her. Then came the turn of brothel clients. Women who had to sell their love started to refrain from taking the Elixir. They envied women of the same age with them who took the Elixir.

Following the demand of some angry wives who were afraid to touch their husbands after taking the Elixir Amanda developed the Back Potion, which reversed the effect of the Youth Elixir. It was free and made to fit genes of each specific woman to protect her from the temptation of giving it to other women. It became the norm that forever young women weared a small adhesive scarlet letter ‘A’ at the top of their left cheekbone. They were not cruel after all.

Amanda, who became billionaire and celebrity, finally announced that there is a cure for toad men. If a woman, who really loves a toad man will kiss him on the lips the plasmids required to alter his DNA back to human will be transferred into the man with her saliva. “The kiss of the loving woman is the only cure.” Amanda said in the press conference. “I myself don’t know the vectors required to edit toad man’s DNA back to normal.” Women in the conference hall responded to her words with applause.

The former King candidate was cured when his adult daughter kissed him on the lips. He hugged her and cried like a child when he spotted a small scarlet letter at the top of her left cheekbone. It was the first time when he really felt the deepest respect for a woman. He regained love of his last wife and they lived a long happy life together.


“Mom, why we then still have toad men around?”

“Some men prefer very much to have around plenty of women for sale. They really enjoy their position now because young fortune seekers are coming straight to them in flocks. Real men became more selective in choosing partners. There is not much physical difference between a girl fresh from college and her mother anymore.”

“Did you take the Youth Elixir, mom?”

“I don’t need it, my sweetheart. I have an artificial body that never age. It’s time to sleep, darling.” The robo-mom kissed her daughter goodnight and went out of the bedroom. The girl in the slowly dimming light was thinking about the lucky Toad King who got cured by his daughter until she fell asleep with a smile at her lips.