Are You Fucking Kidding Me
Hillary Clinton [parody]

What a load of bullshit.

“I gave a flawless convention and three flawless debates.”

Actually, you didn’t. What you gave was an unprecedented failure of a convention. Please name for me another convention that was marked by the Chairperson stepping down for intra-party corruption. Oh, you can’t…because there are no others. I will agree that you did win the debates vs Trump, but they were by no means “flawless”.

“But like, just for future reference, what did you want from me exactly? I mean I was definitely willing to try a lot of things. I’m just not really sure how to “reach out to you about issues that affect you personally” and also not be a “dishonest shill pandering for votes.” Any pointers would be super appreciated next time!!”

Your confusion is no surprise to us, because YOU ARE NOT FOR US. Here’s a thought, if you really wanted to reach out to my generation (millennials) you should have included free college education as part of your platform instead of Bernie FORCING you to do it by withholding his endorsement until you included it in your platform. You also could have “gotten with the times” and not cozied up with big money and lobbyists as it is painfully obvious to anyone who has even remotely looked at the internet lately that most of us do not like the implications of these relationships. You flagrantly ignored us, you assumed you would vote for you because of “reasons”, you marginalized us, and now you’ve lost because WE WILL NOT BE FORCED TO VOTE FOR SOMEONE WHO WE DO NOT LIKE.

“None of you gave a fuck about my email server. None of you even knows what a fucking email server is or does. You were just waiting for any excuse — any excuse at all — to be like “yep, that’s why I hate that bitch.””

Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. WRONG! First of all, there are tons of millennials that understand the difference between an email account, and an email server, we are the generation of the internet after all. Regardless of this, it is clearly YOU who does not understand what an email server is as part of your explanation for your actions revolved around a fundamental non-understanding of basic IT. Regardless of what I’m about to say, it does not bode well in our minds that the leader of our nation during the “information era” is unable to discern the difference between a server and an email address. However, the bigger issue for us, is that you and your campaign attempted to not only cover up the transgressions but you stalled and obstructed a federal investigation and ignored MANY FOIA requests. THAT IS NOT OK! If you really wanted to connect with the younger generation you would have taken a leaf out of Obama’s playbook and ran a campaign on the expansion of governmental transparency instead of rising to NIXON levels of censorship. The fact that you ignored and tried to downplay your actions firmly puts you in the group of people that think “executive cabinet members are above the law and accountability” and we have had enough of that shit with BUSH Jr.

So here is how I see it. You sponsored Trump into candidacy. You conspired with the DNC to undermine your intra-party competition. You tried to hold our votes hostage under threat of “choose the lesser of two evils”. When this all came to light, instead of just owning it, you insulted our collective intelligence by trying to cover it up and claim ignorance. And the people told you to go fuck yourself.

Here’s a thought: if you knew the Bernie people would not vote for you, and you know that your supporters would vote for whatever was not Trump, and you really wanted to protect the future of our country (Trump not winning); wouldn’t it have made more sense for you to concede to Bernie and gained the DNC both his supporters AND your supporters? Of course you wouldn’t make this choice though, because we know you don’t actually care about us.

Thanks for your service, you had a great run and accomplished many good things, but you chose the wrong path and the wrong side and it finally caught up to you. Enjoy your retirement.

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