What “Happiness is a Choice” Actually Means
Unease, anxiety, tension, stress, worry — all forms of fear — are caused by too much future, and not enough presence. Guilt, regret, resentment, grievances, sadness, bitterness, and all forms of nonforgiveness are caused by too much past, and not enough presence.”
― Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now: A Guide to Spiritual Enlightenment (a book that really changed my life)
In the last year or so, I’ve seen numerous people on Twitter express outrage at those of us who proclaim that happiness is a choice, and garner tens of thousands of retweets by doing so. Disdain for the belief that happiness can be chosen seems rooted in a feeling that it belittles people’s struggles with depression, anxiety, and other mental issues that can make happiness feel impossible for those suffering from them. I think there’s some misunderstanding going on about what the phrase “happiness is a choice” actually means, so I want to clear it up.
I’ve been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ADD, and OCD. (What a cocktail! They’re all linked to childhood trauma, no doubt.) I don’t really take those diagnoses too seriously, because they’re just labels we slap on people who experience common mental states more often/more powerfully than the “average person”, and we don’t have a particularly reliable diagnosis method—but they can be helpful for some. At the time of writing…
