Everything You Need to Know about the Edinburgh Fringe from Someone Who’s Never Been to the Edinburgh Fringe

A comedian’s 5-part pep talk for YOU (not about ME) ((a little about ME))

As an expert on the Edinburgh Fringe Festival, which I’ve never fully attended,* I am honored to write this definitive pre-fringe pep talk.

*Disclaimer: in 2018, I snuck over and did 5 free shows and got as many blowjobs.

As the Fringe countdown reaches single day digits, and everyone’s resting heart rate reaches triple digits, let’s take a moment to collectively breathe.

In.

Out.

In.

Hold.

Hold.

Die.

Be reborn.

Assuming you’re also a neurotic, chaotic mess with depressive tendencies putting the final (or first**) touches on your 2019 Fringe show, the coming days are a clusterfuck of emotion and excitement.

**Disclaimer: If you’re putting the first touches on your show: dear God you’re screwed. Otherwise…

You got this! Here’s your therapist-ordered pep talk:

2019 Edinburgh Fringe Official Pre-Fringe Pep Talk