Why So Serious?

He didn’t do anything

Jack Herlocker
A Cornered Gurl
Published in
1 min readMar 3


Illustration by author using DALL-E: “Scary clown sitting on a park bench in photorealistic style”

He didn’t do anything!
Not anything real.

He didn’t touch you.

Not really.

No more than any kid with a finger
an inch from your ear, whining
“I’m not touching you, I’m not touching you!”

No more than that guy in the subway
staring at you
staring at your crotch
licking his lips like he can taste you.

No more than the guy in the clown suit
sitting, just sitting, just peacefully watching
your kids in the playground across the street.

No more than the guy in the office
working away at his laptop
scanning through the images of webcams
he hacked into to watch your middle school daughters get undressed.

No more than some guy in the back of a bus
boasting he can touch you any time
grab you any time
force his fingers into you

And you can’t do squat about it, because
he didn’t do anything.

So have a nice day, and hey!
Smile more!

An earlier version was previously published in 2016:



Jack Herlocker
A Cornered Gurl

Husband & retiree. Developer, tech writer, & IT geek. I fill what’s empty, empty what’s full, and scratch where it itches. Occasionally do weird & goofy things.