How to love yourself and improve relationships

Oh, yeah. I know about that one. Let me tell you, it takes a lot of work to have a good relationship. Especially with the most important person in your life… that’s you.

Why are relationships so hard? Well, it’s because we make them hard. And not many people seem to notice that the most important relationship you’ll ever have is with yourself.

Where everything starts…

Have you ever heard the phrase “If you can’t love yourself, then how will you love others?” Well, it’s true. Sure, they can love you, but that’s a whole different subject.

You need to learn to know who you are and accept it in order to be happy.

You should try this sometime!

A while ago, I wrote an essay about my past, my present, and my future. At first, I thought I had written down the right things but I left it for a couple of days alone. When I got back to it, I started digging deeper into my own thoughts.

Do I really like doing this? How do I feel about this? What does this make me feel?

And then you start questioning everything in your life and you know it’s good because that means you are changing it!

So don’t go for the first things that come to your mind, because you may find contradictory ideas. For example, I put “healthy living” and then “try every burger in the world”. Obviously, I had to choose just one.

How to choose?

At first, I felt both of those things meant the same to me, that they were both important. But as I kept asking myself questions, I found out that they were not equal and that I could actually let go of one.

It took me a couple of months but I ended up realizing that some things are more important once you look at them from a bigger perspective.

And the road goes on and on. This process never stops because we are changing all the time. So we should never stop exploring ourselves.

Look for the experiences that bring you introspective: traveling alone, experiencing new things, etc.

Pay attention to how you react to certain situations. Maybe you are a nice guy but when faced with a tough situation, maybe you’ll get scared and run away; maybe you’ll do the opposite and fight it.

Who knows? Those things might surprise you and you’ll discover something new about yourself. You don’t have to wait for the zombie apocalypse to find out!

Basically, we nurture good relationships when we have them with ourselves. Once you get to know yourself, you can see clearly the things you could not go without. This way, it makes it easier to make a great relationship with people at work or in your personal life.

I, for one, love dancing. Once, I had a girlfriend who didn’t like it so much and started getting jealous when I went out dancing without her. Jealousy got as strong as to the point it broke us apart.

No Small Talk!

Almost every day and with everyone, we talk so much and we say so little.

When you meet new people, talk about the important things. Not the little things, like the weather or where she got her new shoes. At least, try not to make these the main subjects of the conversation.

You can get to know a person so much in so little time if you ask them the right things.

Sure, it can be hard to open up to someone if you don’t really know them, but give it a try! Don’t pressure them, make them feel confident.

It’s the deep things you need to talk about:

What’s most important to you? What are your life goals and dreams? Do you want to have a family? Etc.

When you are getting to know someone, don’t go for the superficial things!

Sure, you both love to travel… and so do millions of other people! How do you like to travel? Now, that’s a good one. Maybe they adore camping and you hate it. Or maybe they go to the luxurious hotel and you prefer backpacking at a hostel.

What about your business partners? Do you really know them? What do they look for in an entrepreneurship? What would they do if everything falls apart?

Get. To. Know. Them.

You never know what you will find. Afterward, you can be sure you’ll make better choices and have deeper and more meaningful relationships in your life.

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