How to Survive Being the Dumbest in the Room
Surround yourself with smart people, soon you’ll be smart.
Everyone says this, but people don’t talk about how you’ll survive being the dumbest one. The fact is, you’re smart, but not just as smart as the people around you, which is a good thing.
Throughout my high school days, I always thought of myself as average. I wasn’t the smartest in the class, but I also wasn’t the dumbest. I was somewhere in the middle and was okay with it. Even though I wasn’t getting awards for being top of the class, I wasn’t being laughed at either. I was at a good point where I never had to worry about my grades. All my friends were of the same standard, so there was no need to develop a complex about not being extremely intelligent.
After high school, I went for A-levels, and for the first time in my life, I was the dumbest in the room.
I had a family friend and then roommate who was also doing the same program, and she is smart and intelligent. She was friends with other very intelligent people. That meant I was the only average one in their midst.
I was at a point where I needed to prove to myself and the people around me that I could surpass their imagination. Also, I wanted to show myself that self-imposed limits didn’t bind me.
I learned a few things in that position that increased my confidence and gave me a good experience. Here are a few things I realized while being surrounded by smarter people.
Stay
Yes, that’s the first secret. You need to stay. How are you going to become a professional if you can’t stand professionals?
I remember talking to my friend after a reading session we had. I was like, “Oh my God, these guys are really intelligent. I bet they’ll go home and say, “Did you notice Udy said so little?”
Mind you, this was still the beginning of the program; we were simply testing our knowledge of what would be taught in the future. She responded, “How sure are you that they’re not thinking the same of themselves? You said a lot.”
That statement made me feel so good about myself. I never told her this, but she gave me hope. She made me believe I could do this and nothing was going to stop me.
The training wasn’t easy, but it was worth it. First of all, I decided I wasn’t going to get comfortable being average. A mind battle has to be one of the most difficult. Trying to get my mind to quit believing something it had held on to for so long was a challenge, but it didn’t stop me from staying.
I spent more time studying and preparing before every class. If everyone read twice as hard, I was up reading thrice as hard. I left nothing to chance. I sat in the front seat every time, because I knew 90% of what I remembered during the exam came from things I heard in class.
I spoke more. I’ve always been a shy person and found it difficult to ask questions even when things weren’t clear to me, but all that stopped. I was outspoken, and I loved it. It wasn’t always about being correct; it was more about pushing past my limit.
Look up to them without looking down on yourself
Inferiority complex is something I’ve always struggled with. I shrink myself and try to be invisible when around people. I deal with it better now, but then it was a major struggle.
I had a constant voice at the back of my head reminding me I wasn’t good enough and that I’d never measure up to the others. Nobody knew that for sure. I may not be as good today, but the future is a blank check, and I’ll fill it with what I want.
I got comfortable with being a learner. Everyone starts as a learner. There is nothing wrong with being a late learner. I accepted I was a late learner, and I’d have to pick up very fast because no one would wait for me.
I spoke more and listened carefully. During reading sessions, I didn’t allow myself to shy away in the corner, mopping; I spoke. I didn’t need to know everything; all I needed was to have an idea and say it.
As time went on, I took up different topics to teach others. They say you learn faster by teaching others. That’s what I did. While teaching, I listened attentively to every contribution others had to make and jotted them down.
I was content with saying “I don’t know," but I also realized everyone said it sometimes.
Stop thinking you’re dumb.
It’s one thing to be the dumbest in the room, and it is another thing to think you are the dumbest in the room. How many times have you believed an obvious lie simply because your brain told you it was true?
As an overthinker, my brain excretes enzymes that force me to believe many false things. That’s why I formed the quote, “I tell my brain what to think.”
I always thought I wasn’t up to the standard of everyone in the room, even though they always said the opposite. They always preferred me to explain different topics because I broke things down better.
Reading sessions were always very interactive, so I kind of felt like I wasn’t teaching anyone. I always ended up with that little voice at the back of my head telling me I wasn’t doing anything extraordinary, but I was.
I remember one of our lecturers talking to us about “always having a ready answer”. The conversation grew into how fast our brains are meant to work. I started seeing myself as smart when lectures and fellow students would throw questions at me, and I’d be able to answer immediately.
Prior to this, I formed the habit of continuous proclamation. I told myself, “I am smart,” every second I got. What do they say? “Fake it till you make it.”
Enjoy being the underdog
Being the underdog has its advantages, if you look closely.
You are surrounded by bigger dogs. This means you have all the needed information at your disposal. In addition to all the information, you still have your personality to add a little spice.
Because everyone else was smarter than me, I positioned myself as always ready to learn. I had my friends explain and re-explain things that weren’t clear to me. They called me whenever they were having their private reading and shared any external resources with me so I could study. They got me studying for five to six hours a stretch.
I learned different reading techniques and was able to figure out which one worked best for me. I did what I was supposed to do because I was always accountable to someone.
At the end of the program, I graduated with the second-best grade in the group. I was so proud of myself that I began to cry. Everyone congratulated me, telling me how they had expected it.
Yes, I did all the work, but I wouldn’t have thought of putting my all in if the right people didn’t surround me.
Penning this now makes it sound easy, but it was the furthest thing from easy. It was more than a school to me. It was a training ground. Being that was my first time away from home, I found myself breaking down a lot, but I kept reminding myself I could be as good as the people I looked up to, and nothing was going to stop me.
Looking back, I realize how much this experience shaped my entire university days and my confidence level in general.
After my A-levels, I had people I didn’t talk to tell me how much they liked or disliked me because I was always acting like the smartest in the class. Or how I and my group always dominated the class. So, yeah, there I was battling the thought of not being good enough, while other people felt threatened by me or in love with me.
It is always a question of “What would I do if my brain made me believe the opposite?” Once you’ve figured out the answer, go ahead and do it. Irrespective of how you feel or the circumstances of things around you. Irrespective of your fears or doubts. Just do it.
Ask the question. Start the conversation. Say what you think of the situation. The best time to jump is when you’re most scared.
It’s okay to be the dumbest, but never chicken in the room.
