A Love Story, of sorts — A Serialized Memoir

Episode 23: On Having a Baby and Vaginal Phobias

“Honey, I think I’m in labor,” I said, as I rolled over in bed, and gave him a good shake.

“You’re not in labor,” he replied, and waved his limp arm at me like I was a pesky mosquito honing in on its prey. “What time is…

Episode 22: Boys Will Be Boys

“I have some awesome news,” Robby said as he stopped by my cube to pick me up for lunch.

“Good, what’s up?” I slipped my shoes back onto my swollen feet, grabbed my bag and we waddled out to the car.

Episode 21: Moving Day

When I moved to Colorado just after my 25th birthday, my life fit into two suitcases — with room to spare. Now, just before my 28th birthday, I was pregnant, engaged and buying a house in the suburbs.

Episode 20: Playing House

The pregnancy was flying by. Rob and I were actually getting along. Our on-again-off-again relationship turned into a brilliant partnership. Maybe all we needed was a little kick in the ass, like a pregnancy and wedding, to get us on the same page to live “happily ever after.”

Episode 19: The Drew Barrymore Saga

The List: Who’s on your list?

Rob’s list, established early 2000: Anna Kournakova, Ashley Judd, Natalie Portman, Heather Graham, and you guessed it…Drew Barrymore

Episode 18: Whose Wedding is it, Anyway?

Sorry I was off-grid with this last week. Will make it up to you this week.

In case you missed the engagement story, it’s a fun one:

Episode 16: Out of Wedlock

“Hey Mom, how’s it going?”

“Jennifer! Hi, you will not believe how fast we swam over the weekend. Emma did a 4:55 in November, can you believe it? And…”

Episode 15 — *69

Once again things were back to normal. I loved him and he loved me. John was back in full force. He’d apparently gotten a gig with Playgirl and had been in Australia for a month long photo shoot. I’d never heard from Alex, for three weeks, anyway.

Episode 14 — Cheap Red Wine & Diet Coke

When I awoke the next day in a daze with a slight hangover from drinking a 1.5 of cheap red wine, I lit a cigarette and peeked out the window. It was one of those Colorado days that was so beautiful and so pure that even if my dog died I could find a way to…

Episode 13

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My mom left the next day. I felt bad that she came all the way to Denver to mother me when all I did was push her away. Of course I never told her that. Nor did I ever clear up the lie I told her about the pregnancy debacle and Robby’s intentions. I imagined she left feeling a…

Episode 12: Worlds’ Collide

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So by now you know that the story started out as a flashback. It flashed back to the day that I’d lost an unborn child, a Fallopian tube and a lot of blood. Almost too much blood.