Meeting the Birth Parents
My wife and I were scared before meeting the parents of our adopted children, but found it a hugely beneficial experience.
I see a lot of posts on social media about being a mother. They are generally poignant but often very sentimental. For me they often fail to capture the breadth of what it means to be a mother (mothers don’t always have male partners, or partners at all and they don’t always give birth) and over-simplify how hard it is (oh the washing and shopping!). I admire my wife every day in different ways and just a small fraction of that is uniquely labelled with 'mother’.
My children are adopted. We had the good fortune to meet our children’s birth mother. It was unusual for a couple of reasons. First, it was some time after the children had been with us, and second, because she wasn’t alone.
I had discussed this with another adopter who was about to go through the same thing. They weren’t looking forward to it. My response was "it’s not about us". Because it’s not. The way I see it you are doing it for a few reasons:
- To develop your compassion so that you can talk about her/them to your children without anger
- To help you contribute to your kids' life story
- To help them/her feel…
