Why I’m Obsessed With the Japanese TV Show ‘Old Enough!’
Yes, the toddlers running errands in this controversial television show are adorable, but that’s not what I love about it.
Has Your 2 Year Old Ever Brought Home Groceries?
Culture shock meets gleeful adventure as tiny 2-year-olds cross the street and buy treats without their parents.
Why are American parents freaking out?
The Japanese reality television show about toddlers running their first solo errands is binge-worthy adorableness. ‘Old Enough!’ is streaming on Netflix in bite-sized episodes accessible by any attention span. Before you judge, watch a few episodes. Then, come back and join in the debate.
Don’t Misinterpret Cultural Differences
Please know that this show isn’t about forcing little kids into independence. I think we Americans might misinterpret that.
It’s about becoming part of a community— interdependence. These toddlers are voluntarily contributing to their family, being useful, and developing pride in the ability to do something themselves at a subjectively early age. The things they do, my American tween hasn’t done.
It is easy to misinterpret, and to judge, based on a culture where the parenting seen in ‘Old Enough’ might get you arrested. We interpret what we see and translate it onto our own children and culture.
Watching the little kids schlep home from the market, chasing rogue oranges downhill, you might think, “I would never send my kid out alone at that age!” But that’s the fundamental misunderstanding: These kids are never alone, they are just not with their parents! At every crossing, every corner, every cash register, we see adults encouraging and looking out for the child, keeping them from harm and treating them like their own. Why wouldn’t we desire to spread that level of care and responsibility for each other throughout our own culture?
How Can We Instill the Value of Interdependence?
I’m not sure if I am more obsessed with this show because I long to be more trusting with my kid, or because I wish he were more interested in doing things by himself?
My son is not excited about venturing out on errands to help our family. I’ve learned not to push my neurodivergent kid before he’s ready, because it tends to backfire. I encourage him, and I recognize that we are part of a wider culture of protectiveness. I provide context and boundaries around safety. I listen for cues that he’s ready.
Over time, I know my son will learn to be on his own more, or with his friends. But will he value interdependence and the contribution he makes to the whole? It’s a value which must be taught. Yes, he has chores, and I talk about the role each of us plays in keeping our home running. Still, reinforcement from the wider community is missing. The reason this works in Japan is because the whole community is on board. No one in the fishmonger’s village is going to call the cops on the parents of the tyke out on their first errand.
Contributing to others’ happiness isn’t glamorous.
The rewards are hard to sell in advance. It isn’t exciting beforehand, but it is rewarding both during and after the errand or act of service. I see the look in my son’s eyes when he does something thoughtful, and I have faith that he will get there.
Watching ‘Old Enough!’ I see the look in those toddlers’ eyes, and want that for my kid. I want that for our culture, because it is missing.
If I could import anything from Japan, it wouldn’t be Hello Kitty.
I wouldn’t want the conformity, homogeneity or work ethic instilled in most Japanese children either. But I would love to bring the Japanese emphasis on interdependence to America! Instilling this value could save lives and improve wellbeing for future generations.
Why Does Our Culture Idealize Independence?
Idealizing independence is a copout, and will hold us back from progress. I’m not advocating for being more dependent, but for recognizing that we already do depend on others for our wellbeing, and by pretending to be independent we are ignoring those contributions. To see that truth more clearly, we can apply gratitude and awareness. Acknowledge the supply chain, generational wealth, natural resources and, exploitation that gave us what we have.
But what does this have to do with ‘Old Enough!’ you ask? What if we decided to do an experiment? What if we tried something new?
What If We Decided to Prioritize Respect and Care?
Saying these parenting practices we see on ‘Old Enough!’ wouldn’t fly in our (U.S.) culture because of crime is like saying “I am powerless over the future.” As parents, we don’t have that luxury. Looking out for the smallest and most vulnerable in our midst WOULD fly if we placed importance on it. It would fly if we shifted our collective mindset away from greed and towards an interdependent future. It would fly if guns were no longer an issue and we reduced desperation by committing to true equity and instilling the value of interdependence. It would fly if pedestrians were prioritized over drivers, and we all honored traffic laws as if our own toddler might be in that crosswalk.
We can teach the next generation to do right by each other, and feel good about it. It’s not so complicated. Encourage interdependence rather than independence. Be part of a more respectful culture. Take care of each other, and your 2 year old might surprise you by bringing home lunch!
Kate Lynch (she/her) is the parent of an amazing atypical kid, an inclusive yoga and meditation teacher, and author of the upcoming book Atypical Kids, Mindful Parents: The joys and struggles of raising neurodivergent kids. In her downtime you’ll find her under a cozy blanket on her couch in Brooklyn, New York, watching toddlers chase oranges downhill.
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