*CW: mention of self-harm, suicide, and mental health conditions
In the next installment of our ongoing column amplifying the works of LGBTQ+, QTPOC, nonbinary, and womxn-identifying poets, our guest is the inimitable Lora Mathis. They have published two collections of poetry, The Women Widowed to Themselves (2015) and Instinct to Ruin (2017). In addition to being a poet and writer, they are a visual artist, and musician. They currently play in the band Giveaway.
Lora coined the term “radical softness” as a weapon to try to encourage and create work that speaks against the stigmatization of mental illness and to mobilize behind vulnerability as a force for change. Their work examines the ways we internalize the social myths of oppressive systems, and works to undo the toxicity we’ve ingested from such institutional traumatization.
As Poetry Editor, I recently had the honor of an interview with Lora, and we discussed radical softness, poetry, and much more.
U: When and where did the origin for radical softness emerge?
L: Radical Softness began as a photo series in 2015, when I was living in Portland. I was processing a childhood of emotional conflict and felt overwhelmed by the intensity of my emotions. I did not have a stronghold on them. I spent a lot of time crying, overreacting to present situations, and struggling with suicidal thoughts and depression. I felt like I was weak, incredibly weak, and that there was something wrong with me. The photo series came out of wanting to uphold the power in healing, and the effort that it asks of people. Deep down, I knew that being connected to your emotions, sorting through painful experiences, and fighting depression were acts that took a large amount of energy. People aren’t weak for being emotional or experiencing emotions in a way that is messy and difficult. They’re human. The photo series was a way to combat what my head was telling me, and the larger social ideas that had contributed to my internalized shame.
Uzomah: Being a poet and being in a band has its advantages in the songwriting department. How do you bridge the two or can you explain the relationship between the two?
Lora: It’s not something I’ve outlined so clearly. Any sort of art I make comes from the same source of feelings. But with songwriting, I feel more in touch with a physical feeling. In the last two years, I’ve been mostly writing music in a band, which has required collaboration and tuning into a group energy. It’s punk music, so while lyrics come into it, it’s been more of an exercise in expressing emotions physically. Poetry feels more so a private act, one that is about tuning into an inner quietness. Still, both require a disconnection from the desire to control and being open.
Uzomah: What are the top five best live shows you have been to?
Lora: Oh wow, I’ve gone to so many good shows. Some that come to mind are Alex G, Girlpool, Elvis Depressedly, Space Missionaries, and Kitty Coup at The Dial, a DIY space in Temecula. It was such a good lineup but there weren’t a ton of people at the show. Human Behavior at the Dog House. People sat on the floor before them in this tiny shed. It was very beautiful and intimate. Get Better Fest in 2016 in Philly, a great queer punk festival that a bunch of people played at and I was lucky enough to perform poetry at. Also, a recent show I went to was at a bar in San Diego with the bands Killi Killi and Ami Dang. Beautiful sitar and amazing show tunes. Tom Grrrl at the Che. Your Heart Breaks and Nana Grizol at the Che. I’ve been to so many shows at the Che Café in San Diego. I can’t remember all of them but definitely some of the best have happened there.
Uzomah: What poet or author who is alive or dead would you love to have a conversation with and why?
Lora: I would love to have coffee with Sharon Olds on a garden porch. She seems like she does not take herself too seriously and has a beautiful and fierce playfulness.
Uzomah: You explore trauma in your poetry, which a lot of LBGTQ+ and QTPOC face just simply by being. How have the arts helped you in the sense of healing in any trauma you’ve faced?
Lora: Making art gives me a way to work through difficult emotions, process, and ground myself. They give me an outlet, and that can lead to feeling more clarity and empowerment. In sharing art, I’ve been able to find connection and community. It takes the feelings outside of being a private act to being one which is shared and less alienating.
Uzomah: The use of text and even poetics in your visual arts is prolific and thought-provoking. Can you explain your process, and if it is different from when you are solely writing than when you are creating visually only?
Lora: Thank you, that’s kind of you. I do not have a clear process. I feel an emotion and I make art in response to it. Sometimes a poem comes out, sometimes a comic, sometimes a graphic or photograph. Occasionally I’ll sit down with the intention of creating in a specific medium, but there’s no clear explanation for that. It’s usually because I’m feeling pulled to that medium. Poems can often come at random times, but I suppose visual art takes more intention. Taking photos requires some setup. I need more tools than my own thoughts to make those.
Uzomah: How did you come up with themes for your artistic endeavors?
Lora: Living life, having questions pop into my head, working through certain experiences and looking for a way to ease complicated feelings while doing so.
Uzomah: A lot of LGBTQ and QTPOC deal with mental health issues with or without even medical aide. How can writing be a healing solution for them, and how has it been for you in terms of fighting stigmas?
Lora: I am extremely hesitant to give any sort of prescriptive advice for a myriad of people, especially people with so many varied experiences. However, I will say that writing has been a way for me to sort through internalized shame and come to a place of increased confidence in my experiences. We all soak in the social messages around us and we interact with others, and ourselves, based on them. Writing has been a helpful way for me to identify my thoughts and a tool in unlearning. In that way, I believe writing can be a tool for others as well.
Uzomah: What poem or exhibit stands out as the best example of how you want to be regarded as an artist?
Lora: This is a tough question! I make art in multiple mediums, so it’s tough to say that one specific thing encompasses how I want to be regarded. I want to be regarded as an artist who makes work challenging cultural stigmas and focusing on emotional growth. I’m working on a new book of poems and visual art, and hopefully that can be a piece of work that will exemplify this.
Uzomah: How can the arts—both literary and visual—readdress the narrative of the LBGTQ+ and QTPOC and the quest to be and co-exist in the society that conditions us not to belong? How can those same modes of expression help heal societal rejection and the lasting effects of the trauma of not-belonging?
Lora: Arts of all forms can be ways to create connection and to speak truths that are otherwise ignored by those not experiencing them. They can give people a way to express themselves in the ways they want to.
Uzomah: Art has always thrived as a way to challenge old customs in the art world and society; how do you think your work does that and why? Is it something you strive for in your creative process?
Lora: This is a larger vision behind my work: I want to expose harmful cultural myths and ease the unlearning of them. Art is a way of working through for me, and in putting it into a public sphere is a way of asking others to challenge their own beliefs and work through.
Uzomah: What would you like young LBGTQ+ and QTPOC readers to take away from your work, especially those who are experiencing trauma and/or mental health difficulties?
Lora: The sense of comfort and knowledge that they’re not alone, that something is not wrong with them for struggling, and that they do not deserve to be mistreated. Also: that they’re more than pain they’ve experienced and to not lose sight of the ability to remake life into another shape. To not lose sight of joy.
Uzomah: Name three poets that inspired you to become a poet, and three visual artists that inspire you.
Lora: So many! Mary Oliver has been a big inspiration for me, mostly in the last few years as I’ve gravitated more and more towards wanting to spend most of my time being observant outside. A lot of poets online inspired me six or seven years ago, when I was sharing writing on Tumblr. One of these is Trista Mateer. And Ada Limon’s poems have burrowed into me over the last year. I love her work. In terms of visual artists, I cannot avoid citing Jenny Holzer. Her work has been highly influential on me, and my mixing of visual art with text. Additionally, the zine-maker and my friend Subtle Ceiling’s personal, diary-like work has stuck with me, especially as I’ve shared more zines and self-published work. My close friend Terra Olvr has also been a big inspiration and collaborator. They also work in a variety of mediums and seeing how their work has grown and shifted over the years has been a guide for me in how I want to create and be.
Uzomah: Where and how do the different mediums you use intersect? How are they related and how are they different?
Lora: Most of my work incorporates text. I make fake film stills as a way to couple text with photographs. I make comics to put illustration with text. It all comes together and it centers around words. The visual elements augment the text. I love focusing on making an image which is visually appealing and catching someone’s attention. That taps into my interest in color and scene. But there is typically the common thread of words and beneath that, emotion.
Uzomah: Which mode do you prefer when choosing to express your universal message as a human being and as an artist?
Lora: I want my primary mode to be action: how I live my life, how I am in relationship to others, to myself, and to my community. Art comes into this, and it doesn’t. It’s about how I live my life. Making creative work sorting through ways of thinking is not enough. Action and habit has to come into play as well.
Uzomah: “Someday I will write poems about this but first I must survive it, ” is written in a bubble said by a girl in a graphic on your webpage. Can you explain what this piece means to you and what you want others to take away from it?
Lora: You can’t always be in a place of clarity and processing. Sometimes you just need to get through the experience. I want others to know that it is okay to be focused on living. This is natural. You need periods to focus on what you’re doing. It’s okay if that boils down to putting one foot in front of the other. Clarity can come later.
Uzomah: We all are surviving something. Is making your art how you survive?
Lora: Writing and art do give me a tie to myself and to the world around me. They are tools of understanding and ways of tapping into connection. It feels like a spiritual endeavor much of the time — a way to listen to give language to what is felt. And yes, this helps me survive. It gives me purpose, attachment, and a way of working through.
You can find Lora’s work here.
