Fake Survivor: Blood Vs Water

Double Trouble

Fake Survivor is back for another round! This will be the second straight season that features a cast filled with half-returnees and half-newbies. Unlike the past two seasons that have followed this format, this won’t be a Fans vs Favorites type of thing. No, we’ve moved on to Blood vs Water!

First, the established rules of this series:

• I have not altered any player’s profile to make them better or worse than anyone else on the season. I have not adjusted any player’s relationship to other players in any way to impact a season’s results.
• For simplicity’s sake, we will assume all players are the age they were the first time they played real Survivor. Otherwise it would be weird to imagine an infant Will Wahl on like Survivor: Africa or something like that.
• No restarts if a player I like in real life ends up being an early boot, that’s just the reality and likely kills his chances to return in the future. That’s life man.

To follow along, here is the link to the simulation: https://brantsteele.net/survivor/bloodvswater/r.php?c=iGC8mruI

Here’s how I’ve decided to do this. I went back and thought of memorable loved ones visits in real Survivor history. I’ve thought of players with associations throughout Survivor history that might be incorporated in this fake season. I tried to see how I could choose 10 players who have already gone through Fake Survivor and link them with 10 loved ones. The loved ones might have played Survivor in real-life, but they also might not have.

I will say, I did mess up last week. For whatever reason, my spreadsheet never had the Fake Survivor: China contestants added. Thus, I didn’t realize when I threw in Cristina Coria in Fake Survivor: Caramoan as a fan… that she had already played in China (and won… how embarrassing). To somehow fix this mistake, it is now Fake Survivor cannon that Cristina Coria has a twin named Cristiana, and she’s the one who played in Caramoan.

Furthermore, we’re breaking the rules a little bit in this season by having one person in the new players tribe who may have played once before. Consider them as production giving the new player tribe a leader of sorts. If you’re guessing that person is Cristiana Coria, a totally real person, you would be correct.

Now that my mistakes have been highlighted and pushed to the side, let’s meet our returning players first. They will be the Galang tribe.

Taj-Johnson George, Fake Survivor: Australia, 9th place

Welcome back Taj! She will represent the oldest season of Fake Survivor in Blood vs Water. Unfortunately for Taj, the first time around, she ran into some issues with a depleted tribe at the merge. There wasn’t much flipping around back in her day, so coming into the merge without the numbers proved to be a death knell. In a more evolved game, it’ll be interesting to see how Taj decides to adapt her strategy.

Jonathan Penner, Fake Survivor: Pearl Islands, 5th place

Here’s another person who was ultimately outdone by a depleted tribe. Penner was the last remaining Drake member in the post-merge. He fought valiantly to survive for as long as he did but wasn’t allowed to sniff the end, where he would have had a strong chance at winning the entire game.

Cindy Hall, Fake Survivor: Africa, 5th place & Fake Survivor: All-Stars, Winner

One of three winners on this cast. Cindy played a brilliant All-Stars game and was rewarded for the win. Before that, she was a fan favorite in Africa for, like Taj and Penner, being in a minority alliance in the post-merge and fighting tooth and nail to survive.

Heidi Strobel, Fake Survivor: Vanuatu, 5th place

A lot of 5th place finishers on this season, eh? Heidi is a must to return because she’s a brilliant Survivor character and in her last attempt, she performed admirably. She was betrayed by her tribe in the late game and left for dead, mostly for being a big jury threat. This time, she’s back for vengeance.

Jonny Fairplay, Fake Survivor: Palau, 12th place

Honestly, Fairplay probably hasn’t earned a second chance based on his original season. But, like Jeff Probst, I am not an unbiased producer and I like Jonny too much not to bring him back. Last time, he just ended up on the wrong side of a larger tribe alliance in the pre-merge. Hopefully this time, he can figure it out.

Coach Wade, Fake Survivor: China, 12th place & Fake Survivor: Micronesia, 10th place

Speaking of my biases, I’m sure some people are like, “stop trying to make Coach happen, it’s not gonna happen”. To which I say, let me have my fun. Last time, Coach made it to the merge where he was picked off immediately. Before that, Coach couldn’t even reach the merge as his tribe was sick of him almost immediately. It’s been more than 10 seasons since his last appearance, let’s see if he’s grown from the time off.

Cristina Coria, Fake Survivor: China, Winner

Here is our aforementioned forgotten winner. Not much else to say about Cristina, she was never going to be considered for this season until I screwed up. So, good for her I guess?

Baylor Wilson, Fake Survivor: Gabon, 1st boot

Look… I don’t think Baylor is a good enough character in real-life to give her a second chance after being a first boot. But I was short one duo that needed to be two women… and Baylor is the returnee I picked to make it happen. Besides, if she does go on a deep run, this will be a comeback for the ages.

Stephen Fishbach, Fake Survivor: Philippines, Winner

Our most winner in this cast. Stephen is probably coming into this season with the biggest target. He played a brilliant social game in the Philippines and everyone knows his style. Unlike Cristina who is obviously forgettable and Cindy, who hasn’t played in a while, Stephen will be top of mind. The early-game will be iffy for him but if he can survive that, I like his chances to go deep once again.

Brad Culpepper, Fake Survivor: Caramoan, 6th place

Brad was one of the last fans standing in Caramoan. He fought and clawed with Troyzan Robertson as the fans kind of took over the game post-merge. That kind of resilience made Brad a fan favorite and the easy choice to return immediately. Especially considering the role reversal we will be seeing with him and his loved one.

Now that you’ve seen the returning players, let’s find out who they were matched with. These players will be forming their own tribe, trying to usurp their more experienced partners and survive this brutal game.

Eddie George, Taj’s Husband

Here we have a college football hall of famer who also had a very successful NFL career. Eddie is a well-known commodity in the football world and in real-life, we know that production badly wanted Taj and Eddie for Blood vs Water. Well, in Fake Survivor, I can cast who I want. So in this instance, I’ve bettered Jeff and his team. Suck on that guys.

Stacey Title, Penner’s Wife

Considering everything Jonathan and Stacey have been going through in real-life, I couldn’t exclude them from this cast. In real Survivor, we’ve seen on loved ones visits how much Penner adores Stacey. She’s since fought bravely against ALS and Penner has been right there by her side at every obstacle they’ve faced. It would be a heartwarming story if the Penners could pull this win off.

Mindy Hall, Cindy’s Twin

Yeah, I know that Mindy Hall sounds like another made up person, but I swear Mindy is real. In real-life, she was Cindy’s loved one visit in Guatemala. She then went on to have her own slice of reality TV fame by finishing second in VH1’s Rock of Love, which… let’s face it, is essentially winning the show because you don’t have to pretend to be dating Bret Michaels after it wraps up. She also won 250,000$ on I Love Money season 4, which is a thing that happened. I’m still not sure if the picture I have for Mindy is of her or Rock of Love’s winner, Taya Parker, but who cares.

Cole Hamels, Heidi’s Husband

The current Atlanta Braves pitched, like Eddie George in the NFL, is a well-known commodity in the MLB. He’s a four-time all-star and won a championship in 2008 with the Phillies (for which he was named World Series MVP). But most importantly, he’s Heidi’s husband and that is his biggest victory of them all. As a Blue Jays fan, my stance on Cole Hamels is that he’s the worst, because he blocked a trade to Toronto. I’ll try to leave my distaste for him outside of this season (besides, we beat Cole in the playoffs that year, so there).

Thunder D, Jonny Fairplay’s Buddy

Maybe now you understand why Jonny HAD to be on this cast. How can we miss out on the chance to see the legendary Thunder D playing Survivor? It would have been Fairplay’s grandma but unfortunately… she died dude.

Assistant Coach, Coach’s Assistant Coach

Was the concept for this season based entirely on me thinking that having this guy on the season would be funny? Yes. Do I regret that decision? Absolutely not. Coach is getting his lackey on this season and he will make sure to tell him every time he makes something awesome happen. It won’t hurt that Assistant Coach will be there to stretch Coach out whenever he needs to get loose.

Cristiana Coria, Cristina’s Twin

She was a pre-juror in Caramoan and doesn’t exist in real-life. I screwed up guys, I don’t know what more to tell ya.

Missy Payne, Baylor’s Mom

It’ll be hard for Missy to do worse than Baylor did in her first season. Again, this pairing was the 10th pair I came up with. I’m not necessarily happy with their appearance but I was trying to keep everything fair, as I tend to be, and this is how it worked out.

Rob Cesternino, Stephen’s Friend

This was a can’t miss opportunity to finally get Rob on Fake Survivor. It’s crazy that he hasn’t randomly come up yet, so instead I manufactured it myself. Besides, isn’t warm and cuddly that Stephen picked his buddy Rob to play with him? It’s also going to land a huge target on Rob’s back given that Stephen is a winner and is known for his tight-knit relationships. The deck is stacked against Rob, so let’s see what he can do.

Monica Culpepper, Brad’s Wife

We know that in reality, this happened in reverse. Monica was cast on the real Blood vs Water so that they could get Brad, probably since Taj declined. In this universe, I so badly wanted Monica that Brad got the call to come back. Who wouldn’t want such a neat lady on their fake Survivor season?

One last note: one obvious memorable loved one is missing from this cast. Reid Donaldson. It’s not that he isn’t worthy, it’s that I didn’t want to throw Colby Donaldson into the fire for a fifth time in 27 seasons. Yes, I do plan to have him back because of his curse, but that just wasn’t the time and because of that, Reid didn’t make the cut. Damn it Colby!

This was a long pre-amble, let’s finally dive into episode one.

Episode One

Okay, as you might remember, both tribes must immediately vote somebody out when they meet for the first time. So let’s get to that right away.

For Galang, three players vote for Brad (Heidi, Penner and Taj) the other seven (Baylor, Coach, Brad, Cindy, Cristina, Fairplay and Stephen) all vote for Taj. It could be that she is so old-school and has been outside the Fake Survivor community for so long, that she just didn’t feel like she belonged. Maybe everyone picked up on that vibe and felt like she had to go first.

Meanwhile, Tadhana proves to be heartless. Cole, Eddie, Missy and Stacey vote for Monica. The other six (Assistant Coach, Cristiana, Mindy, Monica, Rob and Thunder D) vote for Stacey, sending her out of the game in a 6–4 vote. So much for our happy ending.

Unless… Penner is willing to switch places with Stacey. The offer is extended to both Eddie and Penner. In real-life, you gotta figure production would be freaking out that Eddie might send himself to redemption island from the jump.

Both players consider the offer but ultimately choose to stay on their respective tribes. Meaning that Taj and Stacey will have to go to redemption island and await a chance to return to the game. A rough start for married couples on this season.

Interesting to note that on both tribes, the player whose loved one was voted off the other tribe did not vote for the player who would be voted off in their own tribe. IE: Eddie did not vote for Stacey and Penner did not vote for Taj.

From there, let’s check out how these people have aligned.

The Alliances

At Galang, two winners seem to have immediately gotten together in Stephen and Cristina. They’ve also corralled Heidi for this alliance. Baylor, Brad and Coach have formed an opposing faction. If I’m Brad, I don’t know that Coach and Baylor are the two players I’m itching to work with.

Penner is still likely angry about Stacey’s boot and hasn’t chosen a side. Neither has Cindy, who might be trying to lay low and avoid being grouped in with the other two winners. Fairplay isn’t know for sticking to one alliance and thus, hasn’t chosen a side either. He will likely try to ride the middle and hope it doesn’t burn him.

In a rarity for Brant Steele, everyone on Tadhana has found an alliance on day one. The first alliance is a five-person unit that consists of Cristiana, Missy, Monica, Rob and Thunder D. Only Missy voted differently at the first impressions boot than the other four. This group also has the benefit of having some experience thanks to Cristiana’s short stint in Caramoan.

That leaves Assistant Coach, Cole, Eddie and Mindy as the minority alliance. Three of these players have the sports connection. I have no idea what those three have in common with Mindy, but whatever is, they’ve decided they’re working together.

Stephen might not be happy that Rob hasn’t aligned with Cole like he has with Heidi, but Rob is a Mets fan so I can’t blame him for wanting no part in Cole.

In the first immunity challenge of the season, experience wins the day as the returning players defeat their loved ones. Stephen celebrates the win by rubbing everyone the wrong way (maybe he pulled a Gervase).

After their victory, Galang goes back to camp where Brad goes out and finds his tribe’s immunity idol. Given that nobody on this tribe has the numerical advantage yet, this is huge for his alliance. Unfortunately for the minority alliance at Tadhana, nobody finds that idol heading into the vote.

This will likely be a straight-forward vote. There’s an alliance of five, which is considered a strong alliance to boot, and an alliance of four. I’m no Brad Culpepper, but I know that 5>4, so it’s probably just a matter of who the bigger alliance wants gone.

Given that his loved one is already out of the game, the players thought it made the most sense to target Eddie. There’s no one on the other tribe that will be mad at this decision and it’ll keep the peace for now. Eddie’s alliance put their four votes on Cristiana, it isn’t even fair that a returning player in on their tribe, but to no avail. Eddie will join Taj at redemption island in a 5–4 vote.

Episode Two

First up in this episode, it’s time to duel. Taj, Eddie and Stacey will compete for a chance to stay in the game. Last place will be sent home. Taj and Eddie have shared an island together in real-life, this will be their chance to do it again.

Despite being a professional athlete, Eddie’s skills do not translate to the first redemption challenge, which involves guiding wooden spools through a wooden maze. He finishes in 3rd place and almost as soon as it began, his Survivor journey is officially over. Hopefully this stunt casting will give me at least three extra readers.

Stacey is this challenge’s winner and gets the chance to share an idol clue with someone from the Galang tribe. It will be a useless clue given that the idol has already been found, but she chooses to give it to Stephen. No word on if Stephen chooses to burn it or not.

The immunity challenge in episode two goes better for the Tadhana tribe. They pull out the win. This will give the minority alliance some time to look for the idol and try to find cracks within the bigger alliance. They have a lot of work to do if they want to make it to the merge.

And what’s a professional athlete good at? Putting in the extra work. Cole proves it by going out and searching for the idol endlessly until finally, he finds it. They may be down in numbers, but now this three-person crew has a bit of power. Let’s see if they can successfully leverage it to make something happen.

For Galang, this should be an interesting tribal council. On one side, Stephen, Cristina and Heidi will be voting together. On the other, Brad, Baylor and Coach will be together, and Brad holds the idol. That leaves Penner, Cindy and Fairplay in the middle, as king makers… if the two alliances want to go after each other and not the floaters.

We know that Stephen has already rubbed his tribe the wrong way. I kind of expect him to get some votes. It would be one hell of a heel turn for Stephen, king of the social game, to go out this early because he’s disliked, but that would be a great storyline for his character.

Instead, this Galang tribe decides to infuriate me and teach me a lesson in production interference. The Coach, Baylor and Brad alliance does indeed target Stephen, but those will be the only votes he will see. Meanwhile, Cindy decides to cast a random vote for Penner, who will not see any other votes, some interesting strategy from our former winner.

That leaves Stephen’s three-person crew, along with Fairplay and Penner, whose five votes go on no other than Coach Wade. God damn it. I know his season isn’t officially over and he might claw his way back but man… the guy didn’t even make it through one vote this time! Brant Steele really wants me to stop dragging Coach out for these seasons.

Episode Three

Surprisingly, despite their deep spiritual bond, Assistant Coach chooses not to switch with Coach. This no doubts infuriates Coach and he has probably made a mental note to fire Assistant Coach when they get back to the United States. For now, he will just have to focus on winning the challenge for himself.

In this domino stacking challenge, Coach does indeed reign supreme. He finishes first, leaving Taj and Stacey to duke it out for that coveted second place. Stacey is the one who is able to pull through and nab that lifeline, meaning that Taj will follow her husband to Ponderosa. Two official boots in and we have our first pair eliminated.

At least those two will be able to enjoy a nice full-month vacation without the kids. The Survivor thing didn’t work out for them, but you’ve gotta find a silver lining where you can.

After the duel, it’s time for the two tribes to compete for immunity. For the second time in a row, Tadhana wins immunity, sending the returning players back to tribal council. These guys aren’t messing around even after voting out their most physical player in the first vote.

All this winning has some people at Tadhana feeling themselves a little too much. Especially when combined with the comfort that a majority alliance can provide. Almost as if they are linked telepathically, Rob’s behaviour has begun to annoy his tribe, much like Stephen’s has for Galang. Regardless, Rob will not have to pay for this invoice right now, it’s just important to keep an eye on this.

At the last Galang vote, Brad and Baylor took a hit when they lost Coach. Stephen, Cristina and Heidi are still intact. Still, there are three votes floating in the middle between Penner, Fairplay and Cindy. If Brad and Baylor can pull all of them over to his side, they can strike back. They can even force some fireworks with a tie or an idol, which Brad still holds in his possession.

For the second tribal in a row, Brad wants to take a shot at Stephen. Whatever Stephen did to Brad and Baylor, they aren’t soon forgetting it. Meanwhile, Stephen’s trio makes the mistake of going after one of the stragglers, Penner. That instantly alienates Penner over to Brad’s side, leaving Fairplay and Cindy to decide how this will go down.

Cindy shows some loyalty to her fellow winners by throwing her vote in Stephen’s lot. However, Fairplay doesn’t want to let one alliance steamroll the tribe so that he can be easily picked off, so he forces the tie by voting with Brad’s group. 4 to 4, we’re deadlocked and heading to a revote.

On the revote, Brad isn’t able to stick to his guns. It’s hard to blame him. His alliance isn’t in direct peril. He has an idol in his pocket. There will still be some floaters left to hopefully strike against Stephen’s alliance next time. A gambler knows when to hold and when to fold him and, in this case, Brad folded by flipping his vote and sealing Penner’s fate in a 4–2 revote.

Like Eddie before him, Penner will be reunited with his wife in a place they would be rather avoid: redemption island.

Episode Four

After winning his first duel, Coach does not come out with the same fire this time around. Instead, he finishes last and finds himself out of the game almost as soon as it began. This man has made the merge exactly once in three attempts and in that attempt, he was the merge boot. I get it Brant Steele gods, I promise to officially retire Coach from Fake Survivor.

Stacey and Penner will get to enjoy some privacy and quietness together on redemption island while waiting for their next competitor. So far, Stacey has brought the heat in these duels and has been an impressive force.

Tadhana’s momentum is finally put on pause when Galang figures out their issues in the immunity challenge. This was the sumo at sea challenge, so I will choose to believe that Brad just pummelled the living daylights out of everyone (and maybe Stephen beat Rob, avenging himself in this timeline for all the wrong target and broken stick jokes).

Despite holding a plurality with their alliance, Stephen, Cristina and Heidi decide to dissolve their group after winning the challenge. Maybe Brad did so well that they can’t in good conscience leave him out of their group? Whatever logic was used, Brad and Baylor are now the sole alliance left on Galang.

The one stick in the mud for the majority Tadhana alliance is Cole’s idol. If they aren’t aware of its existence, this will be dangerous terrain for them to navigate. On his side, Cole has to have the awareness to know when the vote is coming his way to properly play his idol.

At tribal council, Cole must have not liked the comments that were directed his way because after the votes, he pulled out the hidden immunity idol and played it for himself. This was a terrific read because as the votes were read, five votes were for Cole, none of them would count.

That meant that the three on the outside, Cole, Assistant Coach and Mindy now had all the power. Whoever would be the recipient of these three votes would end up getting the boot. After a pause for dramatic effect, Jeff flips the first vote, “Rob”. Ouch! Maybe Rob shouldn’t have rubbed people the wrong way because it just gave his enemies more fuel to target him.

In Fake Survivor lore, the knowingest-know it all isn’t debated. Rob is the sixth person voted out of his first season. Stephen won his first season and is still alive in the same season Rob just met his untimely end. Yes, redemption island still exists as a lifeline, but Stephen got through his first game without any kind of chance to return.

Episode Five

Unsurprisingly, Stephen does not opt to switch out for Rob. He got himself in this mess, he’ll have to get himself out of it.

Even without his partner’s help, Rob does just fine in this challenge. He goes through it swiftly and finishes in first place. The Penners will be left to battle it out to see who will stay and who will go. Ultimately, not one to give pity points to anybody, Jonathan is just a little bit faster than Stacey and he finishes second.

This is not the result that Stacey wanted in this fake season, but she can live with them. Like in real-life, she showed everyone she was a fighter by surviving three duels before getting knocked out. She holds her head high as she walks out of the arena knowing she laid it all out on the line. That’s more than you can say for plenty of players who got even further on Fake Survivor.

Tadhana bounces back from their loss in the last challenge by winning this one. These new players (and Cristiana) aren’t holding anything back and have matched these veterans, much like the fans in Caramoan. It’ll remain to be seen how things play out for them at the swap and then the merge.

Since Cole’s idol was played in the previous round, the players know that a new idol will be entered into the game. After some time spent searching, Monica taps into her husband’s idol finding skills to grab an idol of her own.

Meanwhile at Galang, in a copy cat move, Brad and Baylor decide to dissolve their own twosome. This tribe of seven people is now devoid of any official alliances. I have no idea where this vote is going to go.

I may have no clue how Galang was going to operate for this round, but Brad sure did. He felt the warm embrace of death breathing on the nape of his neck and he could not stand for it. It was time for our second consecutive idol play of the season.

And like Cole, Brad’s read was 100% correct. These players were coming after him. Even Baylor was willing to sell her ally down the river. Brad’s lone supporter came from Cindy, whose rogue behaviour this season has been unexpected. Cindy is going to vote how she feels every time, and it’s kind of fun to see.

Still, an idol is an idol and the five votes coming Brad’s way were nullified. I figured this meant certain death for Stephen, considering how hard Brad has been gunning for him. But it wasn’t so. Instead, Brad focused on one of Stephen’s former allies, Heidi, and along with Cindy’s vote, Heidi was blindsided 2–0.

Episode Six

This episode begins with a legitimate shocker. After thinking about his decision to not switch with Rob, Stephen decides to change his mind. He announces to Probst that he will be taking Rob’s place at redemption island so that Rob can re-join the game for Galang.

Maybe Stephen feels like he has nothing to prove after his first win and wants to let Rob have another shot at it. Still, we’ve seen three wedded couples (Eddie, Penner and Cole) be given the opportunity to switch with their partners and they’ve all declined. This show of devotion from Stephen will no doubt endear him not only to Rob, but the entire fanbase. What a guy that Stephen Fishbach.

He then steps into the arena and promptly finishes last in his first duel. After getting through the early game with relative ease, Stephen has thrown away his chance at a second victory so that Rob can move on. It’s brutal to see him go but I have to respect his willingness to put himself on the line.

For Penner and Heidi, they live to fight another day. Heidi is left feeling jealous that Cole is unwilling to sacrifice himself for her like Stephen just did. Cole is probably pretty annoyed with Stephen showing him up like that.

Rob gets to Galang and seems to fit like a glove because they win the immunity challenge. I can imagine what kind of shenanigans Rob and Fairplay might get into on a tribe together. Speaking of Fairplay, he gets into a minor fight with Cindy after the immunity challenge. It wouldn’t be a season with Fairplay if there weren’t at least some fireworks.

Meanwhile, after having played his idol, Brad goes back to search for the one that should be re-hidden. His efforts prove to be fruitful when he discovers his second idol of the season. If anybody is making a strong case for the early favorite, it’s gotta be Brad or Monica. If they can just reach the merge together, they will be a powerful duo.

Over at Tadhana, Mindy and Cristiana have their own fight. This one is bigger. Maybe it’s a twin-based fight since they are both missing their other half.

The majority alliance may have taken a hit at their last tribal council. But they still have one more player on their side. And with Monica in possession of the idol, there isn’t much the minority can do if they bigger group is focused on voting together.

Which is exactly what the group of four is willing to do. Cristiana, Missy, Monica and Thunder D line up their votes for Assistant Coach. The three in the minority vote for Cristiana, maybe in solidarity with Mindy, but it’s for naught. The Assistant Coach is doomed to share Coach’s fate as a pre-juror… unless he can make something happen on redemption island.

Episode Seven

Given another chance to switch with Heidi in the arena, Cole sticks to his guns. Heidi will once again have to rely on herself. In a race to put tiles from 1 to 100 on a board, Heidi is unfortunately a little too slow. She comes in last and with that, her second season officially comes to an end.

Heidi was a little less successful than the first time, never really getting her grips into a solid alliance. All of Galang seems unwilling to really commit to anybody on that tribe and Heidi is a player that thrives on social connections. This was not the tribe for her to really do well.

Penner wins this challenge and Assistant Coach, much like his name would suggest, finishes second.

After the arena duel, it’s time for our swap. Will Rob be able to join his old Tadhana allies after surviving one round without tribal council on Galang? These are the new tribes.

On the new Galang, we have Brad, Baylor and Cindy staying in place. Brad and Baylor have been aligned in the past and Cindy has voted with them. Yes, Baylor just tried to betray Brad at the last vote, but she hasn’t been joined by her mother so maybe new faces will scare her back to Brad.

Joining them on new Galang are Rob (who technically is also staying where he was), Thunder D and Cole. Cole was in the opposing alliance on Tadhana but maybe this swap will bring him closer to Rob and Thunder D. He knew there wasn’t much rope left for him back on his original tribe, so he would be smart to seek out some new connections.

The new Tadhana is going to be confusing. Cristina and Cristiana are now sharing a tribe. Considering they are actually the same person, I will have to be very careful when reading the events to make sure I get the right person. Regardless, they are the only current pair that has reunited and will form a powerful twosome. Fairplay is the other Galang member making the trip over to new Tadhana. If he’s willing to work with Cristina and Cristiana long-term, this might serve him well.

If one person seems in trouble on this new Tadhana, it’s Mindy. Monica, Missy and Cristiana were all in the same alliance. Fairplay is coming over as a Galang but if he’s able to stay close to Cristina, he might not be targeted first. Plus, he has a distaste for Cindy so maybe this would be a chance to stick to her by voting out her sister.

With these new tribes, we have our first immunity challenge. New Galang turns out to be the victor which means that we will quickly find out who between Fairplay and Mindy is in the most hot water.

It seems like Cole realizes that his past tribe allegiances need to be cut loose. He gets to work with Rob and Thunder D and is able to form a strong alliance with the two Tadhana OGs. Some impressive work from our pro-athlete. It’s always nice to see celebrities really willing to play the game.

Before the vote, it becomes apparent that Missy’s behaviour is rubbing everyone the wrong way. I’m surprised it took this long to get here. This adds some intrigue to the vote because maybe Missy’s allies will feel emboldened to betray her after the swap added some new visages into camp.

Betrayal seems to be where Monica’s head is at. With Cristina’s presence at Tadhana, Monica begins feeling threatened by an obvious duo. She decides to go with Mindy and secretly target Cristiana. If they can get Fairplay and Missy to go along with the plan, it’ll be a quick separation of the two sisters.

Unfortunately for them, Fairplay and Missy aren’t about to leave a more solid core and stick with the twins. They put their four votes on Mindy and that’s enough to send her packing. Mindy may love money, but she’s going to have to work hard on redemption island to get some more out of Survivor.

Episode Eight

They say that twins often have a deeper bond than anybody else on the planet. That may be true, but Cindy doesn’t feel like that bond extends to Survivor as she declines a chance to swap places with her sister. Stephen Fishbach weeps back at Ponderosa.

This is a puzzle duel, the same one that Eddie simply could not do in the Caramoan finale of real Survivor. Assistant Coach proves his worth by winning the duel. Not far behind him is Mindy, pissed that her sister loves money almost as much as she does.

That leaves Penner in the dust. What a run this man had. He participated in five duels before meeting his end. He didn’t quit when the odds seemed against him. Like his wife Stacey, Penner can hold his head up high for his honorable performance. I’m sure Coach will knight him back at Ponderosa while Penner only wants to spend time with his wife.

In the immunity challenge, Tadhana returns the favor to Galang by winning safety. Galang was likely too confused by having Cristina Coria and her carbon copy both playing in this challenge to do anything noteworthy.

A couple of episodes ago, I mentioned that Monica and Brad could be a veritable power couple if they both make the merge. Then, Monica failed her attempt at a coup last episode and in this episode, Brad’s behaviour has begun to rub his tribe the wrong way. I am cursing these people.

It doesn’t mean that Brad is doomed. He still has an idol and some bonds, but it’ll be interesting to see how this plays out considering the Tadhana people on Galang have formed a very solid alliance. Is Brad willing to play his idol for someone else? Because he might have to if he wants to avoid a rock draw.

At tribal council, Brad chooses not to play his idol. A risky move that becomes doubly so once the votes start coming in. Rob, Cole and Thunder D have decided to target Brad. Thankfully for Brad, both Cindy and Baylor show loyalty by siding with him on the vote, targeting Rob.

Earlier, Brad had been the flipper in a revote to avoid drawing rocks. Now, he sat tensely hoping neither of his allies would flip and send him home with an idol in his pocket. Despite a very tense situation, both Cindy and Baylor stuck to Brad’s side. The same could be said of Cole and Thunder D, who were unwilling to betray Rob in this moment.

That means we are headed to our first rock draw of the season. This is late for a Brant Steele season to be having our first rock draw, these guys are conservative! Baylor, Cindy, Cole and Thunder D all draw a rock from the bag. Whoever draws the purple rock (I think it was actually white on this season?) will be the next to go. Our unfortunate victim is…

From first boot to being sent home without even receiving a vote, Baylor has changed opinions about her this season. She’s not done yet, she will get a chance to save herself in the arena but even if this is as far as she goes, she’s done a hell of a lot better than last time.

Episode Nine

The bond between twins or mother and daughter will do no good for Mindy and Baylor this time around. Everyone knows that the merge is around the corner and whoever wins this challenge will have earned their way back into the game. This one is for all the marbles.

As quickly as she went, Baylor returned. After outlasting Mindy and Assistant Coach on the pole, Baylor has earned her spot back into the game! So ends Mindy and Assistant Coach’s journeys. For a one-off joke, Assistant Coach did decently for himself, now he must go back to Ponderosa and resume his role of servitude to the Dragonslayer.

These 11 players have officially made the merge.

We have eight pairs left in the game, Fairplay & Thunder D, Cristina & Cristiana, Brad & Monica and Baylor & Missy. I can already imagine the emotional reunions for three of these pairs and the weird roughhousing between Thunder D and Fairplay.

Based on tribes, we have 5 original Galang members and 6 original Tadhana members. It’ll be interesting to see how this breaks down. Thunder D, Fairplay and the twins seem like an obvious foursome. Rob is likely to be with them, given that he was on original Tadhana. Monica has since betrayed that alliance, but Cole has formed a close bond with Rob and Thunder D. So that could be an alliance of six.

Meanwhile, Brad and Baylor were so close for most of the game until she tried to vote him out. Then the swap happened, and she fell right back to his side. Will their pairings combine to form a foursome that might also include Cindy? Brad and Monica have an idol each so even if they aren’t in the numbers, they can do a lot of damage to anyone who comes for them.

The exciting thing is that unlike most seasons, it’s hard to see this coming down to original tribe alliances.

In the first individual immunity of the season, Cindy takes the victory. I think that this is a key win for her. She’s a former winner and she doesn’t know where she stands with most of these people. Now, she can let two sides form and hopefully go after each other so that she can blend into the background until there are less people remaining.

Most expectedly, Jonny and Thunder D have a minor fight before tribal council. If any pair is going to turn on each other in this game, it’s going to be those two. As well, nobody finds the merge idol in this round.

At tribal council, Brad can once again feel like the room is against him and he plays his idol. Only this time, he’s partly right. Rob, Cole, Thunder D and Fairplay have joined together as a foursome. They do cast their votes on Brad. But those are the only four votes Brad will be receiving this round.

Like she did in her first vote of the season, Cindy throws a random vote at Rob, happy to be out of this argument and living to see another day. That is the only vote Rob will accrue in this round.

That leaves Monica, Brad, Cristina, Cristiana, Baylor and Missy with the chance to pick off who they want. Seeing that the non-paired up people might think of them as a threat, they form a voting bloc to help each other survive these early rounds of the post-merge (for whatever reason, likely being unreliable, Fairplay and Thunder D are not invited). Their victim in this round is Cole, a likely immunity threat, may as well send him to redemption to see if he can fight all the way back in the game.

Episode Ten: Part 1

Just because she can, Cindy wins her second immunity in a row. It feels like overkill to me but given that the paired-up players have just picked off someone who isn’t in a pairing, maybe she just didn’t feel safe.

Back at camp, nobody finds the idol for a second consecutive round. Rob and Fairplay do bond slightly, which is the beginning of a beautiful friendship. No word on which reality star will power bomb Fairplay at an award show in this reality, but hopefully Rob will be there in person to witness yet again.

It becomes apparent at tribal council that the pairs will still be working together in this round. Cindy is safe and Fairplay and Thunder D are technically one of them, so that gives the three pairs no choice but to go for Rob. Cindy joins them, continuing her attempts to blend into the background. Thunder D, Fairplay and Rob vote for Brad, but it doesn’t make a difference. For the second time this season, Rob has been voted out of the game.

Episode Ten: Part 2

Missy wins her first immunity challenge of the season. I was dogging both Baylor and Missy at the start but so far, I’ve been impressed with their gameplay. Baylor has even fought her way back into the game and both have shown a lot of resilience. They may have come in at the last second, but they’re making the most out of this chance.

Yet again, nobody finds the hidden merge idol. Like her husband, Monica taps into the part of her character that annoys people around her as her behaviour begins rubbing people the wrong way. I might feel another idol play coming in if the pairings are ready to split up into smaller groups.

I Brad and Monica’s mind, the pairs are still going strong. There’s only one person left that doesn’t have their loved one playing with them: Cindy. In their minds, it’s time to eliminate her so the real game can begin. Baylor and Missy share that mindset and toss their votes alongside Brad and Monica.

But Cindy is a winner and a fighter. She’s not going to lay down and die because that’s what she’s been told to do. Instead, Cindy goes to Cristina to appeal to her the last former winner left. If Cindy goes, the pairs will have to turn on each other and who does she think will be the first target? Cindy proposes a coalition with Fairplay and Thunder D with the assumption that if they can ride it out to the final five, Cindy will side with the twins.

That’s enough to convince Cristina and Cristiana that this is worth a shot. Because Monica has an idol, they play it safe by targeting Brad instead. It seems like the other side had no clue this blindside was in the works because Monica doesn’t even consider playing her idol for her husband. Instead, he gets taken out in a stealth 5–4 vote. Never mess with Cindy Hall.

Episode Eleven

This is a brutal spot for Rob to be in. He’s going into the arena to face off against a current and former professional athlete. If he were to pull this off, it would be one of the greatest upsets of all-time. The odds become even more stacked against him when a portion of this challenge involves throwing a grappling hook, something a major league pitcher would probably be pretty good at.

Unsurprisingly, Cole finishes first and Brad comes in right behind him. This will be the end of the line for Rob. He was gifted a second chance by Stephen and Rob tried as hard as he could to make it count. He just ended up on the wrong side of a pairs alliance that also had two idols, at that point, there was nothing he could do.

Cole gives the idol clue to Cristiana. An interesting choice given that Thunder D is still alive in the game but maybe he figures from what Brad told him that they are all working together and this will keep a target off Thunder D.

Fairplay then wins his first immunity challenge of the season. It’s the same one that Cochran won with an advantage in the real Caramoan. It certainly helps to be a string bean in this challenge because it’s all body weight versus muscle strength.

For the fourth round in a row, the idol remains undiscovered at the merge tribe. Instead, Thunder D focuses on getting in a fight with Monica. She is likely pretty upset that he had a hand in blindsiding her husband and of the five in that group, Thunder D seems like the most likely to openly make fun of Brad’s boot.

At tribal council, it’s an easy decision for Monica. She just saw her husband get voted out, she isn’t about to go home with an idol in her pocket. Unfortunately, Fairplay’s coalition falls for Monica’s idol play and cast all four of their votes for her. That leaves the door open for Monica, Baylor and Missy to vote for Cindy and finally get the former winner out of the game, well at least for now.

Episode Twelve

The challenge for this episode’s duel is the one where the players must stack four blocks so that no color shows twice on the same side. For Cindy, this is ideal considering it would have been hard for her to beat Brad and Cole in a completely physical challenge.

Showing he’s not only a physical player, Cole wins the challenge outright. Between Brad and Cindy, Cindy is able to pull herself together and finish Brad off. For winning the challenge, Cole gives Baylor an idol clue and at this point, I have no idea where his mind is.

At the immunity challenge, Missy displays some more of her toughness by winning her second individual immunity of the season. There’s some more good news for the trio of Monica, Baylor and Missy when Monica goes back to camp and finally, someone discovers the merge tribe idol. I guess Monica was just waiting to play her first one before going back in the jungle?

So, the Thunder D, Fairplay, Cristina and Cristiana voting bloc have the numbers, but if they don’t suspect that Monica has found another idol, it won’t matter much. There is a very big possibility that she is about to pull off two consecutive idol blindsides, adding to an already impressive resume.

As expected, Monica plays her idol at tribal council and receives four votes. The twist is that it’s not the four votes we expected to see her get. Fairplay and Thunder D are two of the votes. The other two? Baylor and Missy. They tried to turn their blade on her too quickly and got their votes canceled out in the process.

Monica thought that the plan was going to be three votes on Fairplay, which is how she voted. Instead, the twins swept in and saved Fairplay by putting their two votes on Baylor and sending her out of the game for a second time this season.

Some truly wild stuff in this round of voting but the moral seems to be: don’t underestimate these twins.

Episode Thirteen

In this arena duel, the players must stack a house of cards as high as they can. The first two to reach a specific height target will live to fight another day.

Cindy isn’t about to let her life in this game be fully extinguished, so she wins the duel outright. Baylor has already proven to be a fighter and this challenge has her on even ground with Cole. She is able to build a smidge faster and send Cole out of the game, perhaps unexpectedly.

Cole certainly wasn’t a strategic dynamo, but he competed hard. And when he got on that swapped Galang tribe, he did recognize that he needed to build a new alliance quickly. Then he went out and did it. Cole was really out here playing the game despite making millions more than anyone on this cast ever will. He’s got my respect for that.

Cristina wins the following immunity challenge. She gets to share her reward with two people, so she chooses Cristiana and Thunder D. Thunder D no doubt makes a very inappropriate joke about going on an ice cream date with a set of twins.

After the reward, Cristiana comes back recharged and focuses on finding the idol before Monica can. Fairplay helps Cristiana by getting into a major fight with Monica, leaving her distracted long enough for Cristiana to find the idol for herself.

Tribal council then becomes a game of pairs. Thunder D and Fairplay want Monica out of the game. Cristiana and Cristina disagree and want Missy out of the game. Despite Missy’s attempt at betrayal, Monica and Missy, allies by nature of being without anyone else, vote against Fairplay.

On the revote, Thunder D sticks to his guns. Cristiana reluctantly goes along with it while Cristina actually changes her vote from Missy to Fairplay. Had Cristina and Cristiana been on the same page in this vote, Fairplay would have bite the dust. Thankfully for him, his efforts in distracting Monica gave him enough credit with Cristiana to survive this vote.

Instead, Monica is the one who goes out of the game after a very strong performance. Multiple idol finds and a lot of driving the strategy in the post-merge. She deserves recognition for coming out here and playing her heart out. Now her focus will have to be on returning from redemption.

Episode Fourteen

A classic Survivor competition, jail break, is the subject of the next arena duel. Monica comes in guns blazing, ready to show she is going to fight her way back. She wins the challenge. It becomes a race between a former winner and a former first boot and this time, it’s Baylor, our former first boot, who finishes ahead.

Cindy never got going in this game. She always seemed to be playing from behind and scrapping her way along. Her best move of the season was initiating the blindside on Brad. Unfortunately for her, she wasn’t aware that Monica was hiding an idol away and that caused her demise. Still, for a former winner, she fought incredibly hard and did well to get as far as she did.

Cristina wins her second consecutive immunity challenge and once again brings her twin along for the reward. This seems like a mistake to allow Thunder D and Fairplay alone time with Missy. They will no doubt try to get her to come to their side and split the only other pair left in the game.

Everyone knows that Missy holds all of the power in this round. Both pairs aren’t going to turn on each other. At tribal council, Cristiana feels the pressure of the moment and plays her idol.

Unfortunately for Cristiana, this is a bad read because despite Fairplay and Thunder D’s persistence, Missy chose to side with the twins. Cristiana could have held onto that idol for the second final five coming up when somebody returns from the game. Not only that but now she’s just shown Missy that she doesn’t trust her.

Still, it’s good news for the twins in this round as Fairplay is the recipient of three votes. Interestingly, Fairplay and Thunder D voted for Missy, probably hoping the twins would do the same. In that scenario, whoever came back from the game would still be without an ally and it would be like a complete reset of this original final five.

Finale: Part 1

This will be the final redemption island duel of the season. Fairplay, Baylor and Monica will balance a vase on a balance beam. The last will to drop will return into the game, the other two will go and join the jury at Ponderosa.

Fairplay, unsurprisingly, is the first to fall. It becomes a stand-off between two strong women and ultimately, the player whose had the most resilience so far this season comes out on top. Baylor outlasts Monica and for the second time this season, punches her way back into the game.

To top that off, she comes back into the game and immediately wins the next immunity challenge.

We are now back to where we were with the last vote. Baylor and Missy form one pair. Cristina and Cristiana form the other. Thunder D is in the middle. The big question now is whether either side wants to play with Thunder D or if they would rather just vote him out and sort out their problems by making fire in the next round.

Baylor and Missy definitely have the spirit of Coach whispering “honor… integrity… iron sharpens iron” in their ear because they decide that they want Thunder D out of the game. Cristina, a former winner, is not going to be so compassionate. Along with her sister, she rallies Thunder D over to her side and together, they vote for Missy, sending her home in a 3–2 vote.

Finale: Part Two

In the final immunity of the season, Cristiana takes after her sister and wins her first immunity of the season.

The question for Thunder D and Baylor is simple: do they want to go to the end with a former winner and her sister, or would they rather ally together and target Cristina? There are arguments to be made for both sides.

By going to the end with two players who were in lock-step the entire post-merge, you stand a chance that they will blend together too much and therefore, fail to stand out. In that case, you might pop off as the only different option and become the default vote.

But by going to the end with both players, you are also allowing them to claim that they were so dominant, they got to the end together despite looking exactly alike (almost like they are the same person) and that one of them deserves the win.

Either way, the twins will be voting together for one of Thunder D or Baylor.

At tribal, every player makes the decision that is best for them. Baylor and Thunder D recognize the risk of going to the end with a pair but also acknowledge that being the only different finalist is crucial. The twins recognize that Baylor has fought too hard to allow a seat at final tribal council where her resilience will be admired by the jury who wishes they could have done the same.

That’s why in a 3–1 vote, Baylor becomes the final member of the jury.

I went into the season extremely down on Baylor. After seeing her fight her way off redemption island twice, I was kind of rooting for her to win the game. Talk about changing your legacy over the course of a season, Baylor may have even bought herself a third shot somewhere down the line.

Final Tribal Council

It’s mind blowing that of all these loved ones, Thunder fucking D is one of two remaining at the end. His best case scenario will be to argue that he was the one pair in the post-merge that bucked the trend of pairings aligning. Cristina and Cristiana always voted with other pairs, whether Brad and Monica or Baylor and Missy. Thunder D was the shepherd for the misfits like Cindy, Rob and Cole. He took the harder road to the end.

Cristina and Cristiana worked so closely together. Cristina deserves a bit more credit for coming in as a winner and running this post-merge. She quickly recognized that the pairs needed to work together to survive a potential coup. However, Cristiana deserves credit for being the one to knock out Monica when Cristina was too focused on getting Fairplay or Missy out of the game. Both twins kept each other in check and I don’t know if the jury will really be able to differentiate their games to choose between them.

Let’s find out.

Move over Tom Westman, we’ve got our second ever two-time winner of Fake Survivor. I think this victory, while maybe not as impressive as Tom’s Fake: Heroes vs Villains game, certainly deserves praise. She navigated some rough waters early on at Galang, where alliances went to die. In the post-merge, she really took control of the game with her sister and didn’t let anyone pull the rug from under her.

This was largely a social game win. All four of Cristina’s votes (Baylor, Brad, Cole and Monica) came from people who just liked her more than the other two. Rob and Missy liked her sister more and voted for her. Cindy and Fairplay felt like Thunder D played the best game and he got their votes. All three finalists were worthy and I’m glad nobody got shut out.

Brad is this season’s fan favorite. For his idol finds and hard playing, he deserves the recognition. He seemed like a strong contender near the merge but unfortunately, his flame fizzled out because he got too comfortable running the game from the top (sounds familiar to the real Brad Culpepper).

This was, in my opinion, a fantastic season. I really enjoyed having players who have never actually played Survivor before, it added a new dynamic to this series. We go back to new players entirely next season, but San Juan Del Sur might give me more ways to experiment with this Blood vs Water format.