The dreaded night (Day 28)
It is I who is still dreading the night time. Otto is quite content. Even though I consciously don’t monitor if he is breathing anymore and even though it’s been weeks since that one colicky night, I am not a fan of nighttime with a newborn.
I thought about it and I think it’s because I feel very alone and helpless at night. During the day it seems, you have so many options — if he’s hungry, you feed him, if sleepy he sleeps, if he is active, you sing to him or tickle him and rejoice his smiles.
But at night, we should be sleeping. And I have to say that even though our baby boy is exemplary at sleeping and we come out each morning quite rested, it still feels we’re doing something wrong if he wakes up a lot.
I know, it’s crazy, because he wakes only when he has a need that needs to be addressed.
I was told I overthink things a lot. It’s absolutely true, so for the sake of my sanity, I need everyone that have any ideas, to tell me how to stop my brain from going into overdrive for each little thing.
Motherhood in numbers:
- shower: still none
- hours alone with our son: seven
- diapers changed: five (one was changed by my husband)
