Can We Please Stop Competing in the Suffering Olympics
What’s with this obsession of comparing woes and undermining individual suffering?
You think you’ve got it bad? Others have it worse.
Oh, toxic positivity and silver linings, you have a lot to answer for. And I tell you something else: being told that someone has it worse does not make us feel better. I mean, it’s not like we skip around thinking, oh yay, I feel really crap, but someone else feels crappier; now I feel better about things.
I’ve spent my life grappling with complex feelings triggered by complex situations. Yet, I’ve always received the message that I should look at the positives and put things into perspective because at least I have [insert any of my many privileges here].
And to some extent, this is true. I have a house, food, and my health. I live in a safe country. I have freedom. Heck, my skin colour gives me privilege.
I ooze privilege.
But that doesn’t mean that any of my complex feelings are invalid. And dismissing and belittling people’s feelings does not mean they go away. They just become suppressed and poison us from the inside out.
Instead of engaging in a game of one-up-manship of pain and suffering, appropriately…
