About Me — Alina D
A seeker. A self-researcher. A little bit lost sometimes.
Hi, my name is Alina. I’m 30 years old, and my surname is so long and hard to pronounce that I will just shorten it to D.
(Ok, it’s Derzhapolskaia. Don’t even try to pronounce it! Though in my native language, it sounds beautiful, at least to me.)
Where am I from?
Vladivostok. My dear home. A small seaside city in the Far East corner of a huge Russia. By the way, Vladivostok is much closer to Japan and China than to the capital of Russia.
Growing up surrounded by the endless sea, wild winds, and foggy cliffs created a constant need for that feeling of freedom in my life and a strong desire to be closer to nature.
In my childhood
I was always surrounded by loving family and friends. I was also addicted to reading and could spend all day with a new, fascinating book. My father instilled my love of fantasy and fiction. When I was little, he read me “The Hobbit” as a bedtime story.
Now I love a good story in any form — book, film, series, PS games.
My favorite universes are:
- Harry Potter (yeah, classic)
- The Lord of the Rings
- The Witcher (books and games, NOT the series)
- The Last of Us (games)
- Avatar: The Last Airbender (cartoon, NOT the film)
- The Game of Thrones
Career
It seems that my teenage life was so reckless that I didn’t ever have deep thoughts about what I wanted to do next and how to earn a living. I thought the answer would just come to me one day.
But it didn’t. Still.
“I can find something that I would enjoy (or at least would not detest much) and make a living from it!”, — maybe this belief is standing in the way of a stable, regular career.
I can’t accept the thought that I would give the biggest part of my life (time-wise) to something that doesn’t give me any meaning or purpose.
Since graduating from university, I’ve tried many paths: photographer, videographer, English teacher, recruiter, HR consultant, market researcher, cafe assistant. Not to mention several hobbies that I wanted to turn into a small business, like gypsum and resin art.
I’ve never had a sense of purpose in those jobs. Though sometimes there were interesting projects and a lot of self-development along the way. And I’m grateful for that!
But I didn’t have an answer to“Why do I do this?” (except for money).
I believe it’s possible to succeed in almost every career with hard work and determination. But how do you choose exactly where to put these efforts?
There were times I was so frustrated about this choice I had severe panic attacks and a fear of doing anything (because I was not sure it was worth it).
But does a job define you?
I’ve had so many memorable experiences in life apart from my job(s) that sometimes it seems strange I worry so much just about finding a “calling.”
For example, my husband and I have already traveled to 27 countries. We are both from Vladivostok, and after exploring all the fantastic nature in our region, we developed an urge to investigate further and see magnificent natural spots worldwide.
The Italian Dolomites, Norwegian Fjords, and the Grand Canyon are so different, but they are all indefinitely mesmerizing.
First of all, traveling made me understand that people ARE different, but at the same time, NOT THAT DIFFERENT. We all want to be safe, happy, fulfilled.
There are no good or bad nations or countries, but people worldwide can make good or evil decisions based on so many, sometimes uncontrollable, factors in their lives.
Where am I now?
My husband and I moved to New Zealand and have lived here for a year and a half already.
I work part-time as a cafe assistant (because I couldn’t find anything else without local experience) and am searching/thinking about what I want to do next.
My experience and thoughts about New Zealand are a whole different story. But for now, I can say that I adore the lush and wild nature here!
And also that moving countries is hard. I miss my family a lot.
So, who am I?!
A seeker. A self-researcher. An explorer.
Now, I see that no matter what I do, I will never start from scratch because I still have all my previous experiences.
I can try and fail, but I will continue searching and doing what interests me and what I believe in. And I believe in two values — kindness and freedom.
Here on Medium, I will continue to explore myself, sharing my thoughts and some research about topics I want to find answers to — immigration psychology, the definition of home, choosing careers, and the concept of happiness.
Maybe even more, I want to know how other people answer all this questions I have.
And I’m also trying something new I’m interested in — writing!
I hope my writing will someday help people immerse themselves in new worlds and universes, and my stories will help them understand that kindness is still the answer, no matter how dark the world may seem.
Kindness to others, but first of all, to yourself.
