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AI Fixed My Birthday Speech.
Next week (15/08/2022) is my 60th birthday and we are going to celebrate that fact. I’m not sure what the celebratory angle is though. I mean, are people merely happy to mark my reaching a, seemingly significant, numerical milestone? Perhaps they are excited about the completion of another year, closer to the inevitable, than I was this time last year. How likely is it, that the only reason to have a celebration is so people can get pissed (that’s drunk to you Yanks, not angry), and eat a load of food at my expense? Who knows? Considering that, in this household at least, life just seems to happen around me and I am usually the last to be consulted about anything, I thought I’d go along with it.
Me: “Do I have to say anything at this party?”
Mrs Hackney: “What are you on about?”
Me: “Like a speech or something?”
Mrs Hackney: “You can do but, for fuck sake, don’t be all weird and stupid like you usually are.”
Me “OK.”
A couple of hours later I had written a speech and read it back to myself a few times, even out loud to see if my voice would go weird at any point. I quickly concluded that I wasn’t confident in it. Three days later, after several re-writes and re-reads, I deduced that I couldn’t think of any further amendments that would make any sense.
