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Covert Narcissism and the Subtle Poison of Conditional Praise
How Covert Narcissists Use Compliments As Tools for Later Withdrawal or Manipulation
The setting of narcissistic behavior differs much more subtly than public awareness usually acknowledges. Grandiose narcissism manifests itself in overt acts of entitlement and superiority; covert narcissism operates through more subtle channels sometimes overlooked right away. Among these complex mechanisms, strategic use of conditional praise is one of the most subtle weapons in the psychological toolkit of the covert narcissist. Unlike sincere appreciation, which validates others’ natural value and celebrates their successes without hidden agenda, conditional praise is a great tool for psychological control, building dependence, and preservation of narcissistic supply. Originally seeming as a kind of generosity, this kind of compliments serves as a Trojan horse hiding later withdrawal, qualification, or manipulative strategies meant for the narcissist’s needs. The conditional character of this praise often stays latent instead of clearly expressed, which makes its manipulative power more difficult to see and reject. Usually oblivious of the invisible strings attached, recipients register the first positive feedback and create a psychological environment where they unintentionally modify their…
