Member-only story
What Use to Make Me Feel Free Doesn’t Anymore
Alcohol. My story.
I remember the moment I fell in love with drinking.
I was recently 21, walking, no, dancing in the street with my best friend as we headed to the next bar. Something clicked inside that made me feel like I finally came alive. Everything seemed enhanced, and I liked it.
I was freely moving my body around without a care in the world.
I was having fun.
I was without inhibition.
I felt free.
And I wanted every night to be like this night.
So, I tried to do that.
For many, many moons.
WHEN ALCOHOL WAS FREEING-UNTIL, IT WAS NOT
I went out a lot.
My slightly older co-workers would too. However, they would not dance on the dance floor to indie rock’n’roll bands. And it wasn’t because they were playing before indie became cool.
“I have so much energy!” I’d yell at them. “How can you just sit there like that?”
They were on their second pitcher. “Because we’re not 21 anymore.”
They meant that they weren’t new to the bar scene, not new to binge drinking.
