4 Key Lessons I Learned from Camping with Cancer Survivors
I am riding on a narrow bench seat in the rear of a 15-passenger van, scrunched between an Episcopalian priest and a nationally renowned oncologist. This sounds like a joke: “So, there is a middle-aged woman, a priest, and a doctor, sitting in the back seat of a passenger van.” What I am about to tell you is no joke. It is four life lessons I learned from Above + Beyond Cancer’s most recent transformational journey to Horseshoe Canyon Ranch near Jasper, Arkansas.
1 “Only through our connectedness to others can we really know and enhance the self. And only through working on the self can we begin to enhance our connectedness to others.” — Harriet Goldhor Lerner
Luke, a new friend, is 32 and six years out from his stem cell transplant, the treatment for his second diagnosis of cancer. His first cancer occurrence came at age 23. Growing up he was the type of boy that was full of grass stains and dirt: popping wheelies in the woods, fishing the streams, and snowboarding the mountains. Luke and nature are soul mates. The four-day trip to Arkansas to canoe, rock climb and hike, suited his Crossfit-molded physique. What perhaps came unexpected was the fast bond that cancer survivors create when sharing space and uniting for a cause. Three days after he met the other survivors, he stood strong as a thread of prayer flags swayed over him. The man who navigated cancer twice, and miles of river rapids that day, unleashed tears with 28 new Above + Beyond Cancer friends — cathartic tears in memory of a 6-year-old friend who died from leukemia. And tears of hope.
2 “Keep your goals in front of you and your fears behind you.” — Tony Robbins
My friend Corey is brave in many ways. Corey is a 36-year-old survivor of Hodgkin’s lymphoma. The word cancer first became a part of Corey’s vocabulary at age 14 when he lost his grandfather to Non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma. Nine years later his mother was diagnosed with breast cancer. She remains cancer free. The year before Corey’s diagnosis, his father died from pancreatic cancer. “The term ‘cancer survivor’ may describe me, but cancer does not define me,” he said. Corey is determined to redefine a life with more adventure. However, Corey is undeniably afraid of heights. Corey’s legs shook as we ascended to a wooden platform, on an outcropping, to a half-mile zip line that zooms to speeds of 60 mph. His face turned white, his knees buckled and his breath quickened. He paused, near panic attack, eyes widened with fear. The team coached, encouraged, and guided, and at some point Corey made the anxious decision to step in the zip line harness, and put his fears behind him.
3 “What is joy without sorrow? What is success without failure? What is a win without a loss? What is health without illness? You have to experience each if you are to appreciate the other. There is always going to be suffering. It’s how you look at your suffering, how you deal with it, that will define you .” ― Mark Twain
My 59-year-old friend Susan, a wife and mother of two sons, is juggling a second occurrence of cancer. One week after treatment for breast cancer she trained and trekked to Machu Picchu with Above + Beyond Cancer in September of 2015. Months after her return from Peru, cancer returned. Susan seeks balance in maintaining a quality of life, including a job she loves as a cardiac nurse, and her current treatment. She bravely delayed a scheduled chemotherapy session and instead strapped on a harness and helmet, and for the first time rock climbed an 80-foot vertical escarpment. I saw the smile encompass her face, and I witnessed how tackling those steep rock and finger gripping ridges, with friends and fellow survivors cheering her below, brought her life and joy. Those are immeasurable means of battling cancer.
4 “Doctors can cure cancer, but that doesn’t make them experts of class III rapids. ” - MJ Van Heukelom
Dr. Richard Deming is the director of oncology at Mercy Hospital in Des Moines. He is also the founder of Above and Beyond Cancer. Dr. Deming is, hands down, one of the most compassionate doctors in the universe. He doles first-time-to-meet-you hugs, attends patients’ funerals and the birthday parties of survivors’ children. Dr. Deming is also a courageous adventurer who leads all of Above and Beyond Cancer’s transformational trips. He has heli-skied the Swiss Alps and trekked to the Base Camp of Mount Everest, earning him the nickname “Doctor Danger.” However, next time you see Doc Danger, ask him about his tango on the Buffalo River rapids, during an eight-mile canoe trip with a team of cancer survivors.
If you want to experience similar life epiphanies, join Above and Beyond Cancer. Find us on Twitter @ABCanswer and Instagram @aboveandbeyondcancer or register for our newsletter on our website. And, by the way, I am more than a middle-aged woman. I am a certified cancer exercise trainer who leads a Total Training Fitness Class for Survivors. I adore training cancer survivors, and they inspire me daily. If you want to be challenged to discover your optimal health in body, mind and spirit, contact me at mary@aboveandbeyondcancer.org
