A year had passed. My workplace had become more frustrating, despite a raise I received. In short, my new manager had fucked up a few times since she began overseeing me last year. However unintentional, she’s made me feel undervalued. She isn’t available for support when issues arise. She had even suggested I could work elsewhere when I’d brought issues to her attention — then furiously backpedaled. She is incredibly disingenuous, and I consider her little more than a yes-(wo)man.

I got especially aggravated one day, about a month ago. It was something small, but a type of “last straw” issue that made me grit my teeth…hard. I tried to open my resume from my Dropbox. The file was old, and written on software that didn’t jive with my current programs. I was so bent out of shape, I wrote my resume from scratch. Then, I went rummaging around on the internet.

I found a job posting for a position that was a) far away from me, and b) completely outside of my capabilities, or so I thought. I submitted myself for it out of pure frustration, because I knew I wouldn’t hear from them.

They emailed me several weeks later, requesting a phone interview. When we got on the phone, the HR representative was excessively complimentary. She began selling me on working there. She was pitching to me more than I was pitching to her. It was super crazy bizzaro, and I figured they mixed up my resume with someone else’s.

Then, without hesitation, she asked for my current pay and what I would be looking to earn if I were to switch jobs. I did not expect this blunt of a question so early in the process, and I didn’t think fast enough. First, I told the truth about what I get paid. Second, I gave a very unprepared two-thousand dollar range of what I would be looking for, which started only 12.5% above my current pay. I did all this without knowing the salary range of the job I was applying for. These were all mistakes on my part.

Then, after more compliments and an in-person interview, I was given an offer. Not only that, I was offered a senior-level version of the job I had applied for, which I did not expect or know about. This was me.

Their offer was at the lowest end of the “looking for” range which I had given during the phone interview. This increase of 12.5% from my current salary, I later calculated, would be a borderline lateral move. When I quoted them the number, I wasn’t considering the life changes, commute, plus the small isolated perks and extra pay (beyond my salary) my current job offers.

I asked them for a day to think it over. I performed the research I should have done initially. Then, I watched a YouTube video. Then, I read generalized internet feedback on my situation that told me that I was backed into a corner, and didn’t have any options. Then, I made a very strong cup of coffee.

That girl’s voice, the one who challenged me at the barbecue, played in my head. Her stance appeared to be that there was something wrong with the system, which prevents women from getting what men ask for, and makes it not okay for us to ask for the same. Am I good enough, and smart enough? Do people like me?

This company seemed to like the shit out of me.

I reached out to the HR rep who had given me the offer. I asked for it to reconsidered, possibly in an area around 25% more than my current pay. I cited the reasons for this request. I figured I didn’t have much to lose. I have a job, albeit a moderately frustrating one, and I’m not starving or homeless. I expected them to compromise with an in-between number, or tell me to shove off. No biggie.

Even so, I went home and freaked out. My current job is a great fit for me, but isolated problems in my workplace (which no one plans on addressing or fixing anytime soon) make it less than ideal. But, I still worried about leaving for the unknown. Surprisingly, the one thing I did not worry about was being selfish. I made this request knowing it was valid, based on my skills and needs. If they want me, they have to play ball.

They called the next day and offered me an increased number, 25% higher than what I make now.

Um. What? x 2

Holy crap, it worked. It worked. After asking a few more questions about the transition timeline, I said yes. This was me.

Is there a problem with how women are perceived in workplaces? Yes.

Are some women squeezed out of or made to feel uncomfortable in male-dominated professions because of the Boys Club mentality and behavior? Absolutely.

Is there a problem with wage inequality because of how managers, male or female, react to women asking for higher pay? I’d say so.

However, I felt like I had somehow broken through all of those realities in this endeavor. I have no experience in negotiating my pay. Hell, three years ago I was in between jobs and begging people to hire me for a dollar less per hour than I had been making previously, just because I really needed a job. And now I was asking a potential new employer to double my pay bump?

Who am I?

I am someone who just gave herself a massive raise. That’s who.