Internet parties are chill
The last time Internet sad boy went to a party, he was kicked out.
He drank too many gifs.
He went into hiding for a little over three years. Depressed that his appreciation for gifs wasn’t accepted by society, he crawled into an Internet bat cave — similar to those that today’s terrorists seek refuge in.
Stunned at the absence of cats, he sat in solitude.
One day, Bruce Lee DDOS attacked the Internet bat cave. Internet sad boy received a thunderous kick to the gut (in the form of IP packets). The sad boy had no choice but to flee.
For awhile, he wandered the Internet graveyard.
There he met Tim Berners Lee.
Tim told Internet sad boy that gifs were cool, and that one day people would love them.
The boy was skeptical.
Since Tim is basically the Jesus Christ of the Internet — the boy decided to trust him.
Off the boy went - with one goal: convert human beings into gif zombies.
He walked up to a popular bulletin board and posted the first gif ever.
With no purpose at all — the gif was of a cat laying inside of an empty box of pizza, desperate to finish the last piece.
Like so …
People roared in laughter.
From that point on — people had no purpose other than to support the adoption of gif usage.
People asked:
- “What is this .gif thing?”
- “Where’d it come from?”
No one knew who posted it.
The username was null, nil, empty set, whatever.
People assumed that the Internet Gods had posted it, in order to show them “the way.” For most cases, this is a reasonable method of explanation.
Internet sad boy put on his V for Vendetta mask, and laughed.
Soon people replaced churches with sacred boxes to worship gifs. It wasn’t long before every corner of the Internet was covered in gifs.
Time to party.
Internet sad boy was liberated from his depressed state. He was relieved. Finally people got it.
Gif files were the shit.
He went back to the same club and drank himself into a stupor of gifs.
El fin.
Regards,
<code> Internet sad boy ❤__❤ </code>
…
