I’ll be the worst boyfriend you’ll ever have

Cuz’ I deliberately made an oath to be your “worst”…and your last.

A woman’s fantasy (not all, though) is to have someone to snuggle with on a cold rainy midnight.

Or to have someone hold her hand as they stroll along the sand with their wet feet.

Or to be tagged by someone in a Facebook status with cheesy power lines and quotes about forever.

And of course that someone should be a stunning human being. Someone with muscles all over his body, and someone with a voice of an angel. That someone should be a varsity team captain or a school council president or a school paper editor in chief or all at the same time.

And of course I’ll never be that someone.

Not that I can’t be a basketball star or a valedictorian, or that I’m too occupied with myself to the point that I won’t have time to have selfie sessions with you.

It’s just that I deliberately made a choice to be your “worst” boyfriend ever…and your last.

As your boyfriend, I chose to never take you alone to the movies then have dinner together. To drive you to your house and give you your well deserved goodnight kiss by your porch.

I chose to never stay up late, texting you every time the longer arm of the clock reaches 6. To never post a status or tweet a message of how truly, madly and deeply I’m in love with you.

I chose to never give you a bouquet of flowers and a box of candies during Valentine’s even though all your friends received a couple.

I chose to never give in to our desires. Desire to kiss you under the rain, to watch GoT together as I wrap you with me, to put my heart against your chest, to smell your hair with your familiar scent, and to feel you, and be one with you, yet.

Yet.

Yes. This word makes all the things I chose never to do become so worth it.

And, no. It’s not because I don’t want to do these to/for you (in fact, i would DIE to do these for you), but it’s because that I love you.

Love you to the point that I’d chosen your purity over desire,

our future feelings over my present’s,

what’s best for you and for us over what feels good.

Tell me all you want how melodramatic and boring all these are and so be it if I’ll be the “worst” boyfriend ever.

But I’ll be your last.

Cuz' I will have married you eventually, to be the husband God intended you to have.