As much as we hate to admit it, money influences our relationships with others, including our partners. Yes, you love your partner, and your partner loves you, but managing your finances is really important to ensure that you’re both on the same page.
Maybe you’re the type that saves money while the partner is a massive spender. Maybe one of you needs detailed spreadsheets while the other person can calculate mental calculations seamlessly, without having much disruption in their day.
It’s surprising to think that many couples rarely talk about their finances, but during turbulent times like these, it’s especially good talking about them. If there’s barely food on the table, you wouldn’t want to spend recklessly or commit a social snafu in the process.
There’s got to be some kind of system in place.
The Importance of Financial Management
If you’re in a romantic relationship, things like the bills, rent, mortgage, and the general cost of living are quite high, especially if there are others to take care of, such as your children, siblings, parents, and pets.
For the sake of your family and for the sake of your sanity, money management is something that absolutely important. You can still love your partner while managing your finances, but the hope is that your partner will do the same things for you.
I mean, relationships are equal partnerships. Money is generally an uncomfortable topic that could lead to fights sometimes, but never talking about your finances won’t cause your problems to magically disappear either.
1. Sit Down and Talk Logically Like Adults
Talking is pretty straightforward. Talking about finances can easily make other people uncomfortable, and want to run for the hills. If one of you is spending money recklessly while there’s no food on the table, then you have a problem.
It’s best to talk things out reasonably and maybe have some kind of agreement on how the finances will be managed. Be on a similar page if you can. Try to be civil.
You are adults, after all.
2. Take Into Account Childhood Experiences
Sometimes, our experiences from childhood shape how we perceive our finances, but we need both of you to be on the same page.
It’s a partnership, and you both deserve an equal say, even if one person is a breadwinner and one person is a stay-at-home parent. I mean, some stay-at-home parents could be more familiar with the prices at the grocery store versus the corporate busybody.
Either way, just take childhood experiences into account.
3. Establish a Finance Plan
It’s okay to be different, but try to agree on some kind of plan. Perhaps you need to whip out a spreadsheet and break down your finances for the month. Maybe there’s one area where both of you are spending too much on.
I mean, you have nothing to hide, and we just need both parties on the same page. If money is magically missing, then we can try to look for a pattern. Work together to solve the problem instead of allowing the problem to divide you.
4. Revise Finance Goals
As time goes on, spending habits may change. You may need to spend more money on essentials, especially if the cost of living is getting higher and higher. Maybe you have unexpected financial hardships like:
- A broken dishwasher
- A baby who needs larger clothes
- A sudden illness in the family
Whatever the case it may be, work together and figure out a timeframe for each of these goals. It’s not easy, but you got this. You’ve survived much worse already.
5. Have Weekly Meetings
People have work meetings scheduled all the time, so the same can be done with romantic partners, especially if you’re both super busy. I mean, long-term relationships are an investment and you’re working together to make it work.
Money management is just a part of being in a relationship. Set up some time to talk about the bills, spending habits, or whatever else you feel like. You can both review your accounts to ensure that bankruptcy isn’t an issue — before anything happens.
6. Be Honest
Sometimes, partners have habits that they are ashamed of. Maybe you’re worried that your partner will find out about your gambling problem. Either way, it’s going to hurt the partner (especially when they eventually find out anyway) so they might as well receive the truth before someone else (or something else) notifies them.
Yes, they will be mad. And yes, I know it’s not easy sharing these kinds of things, but at the same time, honesty is a good policy.
I mean, it’s okay to sparingly spend money for fun, such as a random lotto ticket, but it’s not okay if you forgot to pay the bills because you spent it all on lotto tickets.
That might be a problem.
At the end of the day, you’re a team, and as a team, you will face many problems, but with a little brainstorming, creativity, and intelligence, you can both make things work, especially in the days ahead.
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