THE DOMINO EFFECT
“Change is the only constant.”
We have heard this many times: we all desire a change in one form or another. We wish, we hope, we dream. However, change, this desired thing. Wonderful, exciting, fresh, empowering change, can seem so tough, especially when we try to change everything all at once. This is because this approach, unfortunately, does not work in the long run. We end up becoming overwhelmed. We give up and remain in the same “rut” that we were in before and continuing this pattern will only contribute to the worsening of the situation.
So, how can one create effective change?
One of my mentors used to talk a lot about the power of selection and focus. He would remind us repeatedly to become selective in what we do, selective in who we spend our time with, selective in where we direct our focus, selective in starting small and selective in focusing on a task.
“Whatever you are doing, whether it is setting up a business, starting a new project, creating a new life, just choose one process,” he would say. “Do it over, and over, and over again. Master it. Dominate it. This will have a domino effect on everything you do.”
Each time I heard him say this, I would nod my head and resolve to do so, but each time I did I, admittedly, got mixed results. Not because the advice was unsound, but because I was in a hurry to see results faster. I would unwittingly allow myself to fall into old habitual patterns of wanting to do it all at once. I would succeed for a while and feel quite accomplished but then the fatigue and stress of doing too much all at once would overwhelm me and leave me burnout.
Old habits die hard they say and I can bear witness to the veracity of this. However, I was determined to see results, so I decided to apply his teaching to at least one part of my life.
Bingo, Hallelujah, Eureka, Wonder of Wonders, it works!
I chose to focus on one thing and keep it consistent over a period of time. This made the pursuit easy enough to be managed but still tough enough to push me a little more out of my comfort zone. This took some reasoning and tweaking. There were days when I felt like a winner, I was productive and accomplished, and then there were days when I felt lazy, disheartened, low on energy. My mood made me question why I was doing it all. Needless to say, it was not smooth, and the challenge had its ups and downs. I accepted that part of the journey and continued it as an experiment, having already invested time and effort into starting and persevering.
A few days along this journey I noticed I was more in control. I looked forward to working on this task, perhaps because my mind found it easier. Through repetition, my results became better, and I felt more productive than not. Frankly, you do start to feel good when you master something you had feared before.
I also noticed that my skills in other areas of my life were all being impacted by having gained a competency, expertise and mastery of this single task. That confidence, that feeling of being able to do the tough stuff, that security of somehow being able to figure things out, became a more integral part of my being. This isn’t to say I don’t have doubts or fears anymore, but the way I approach things, particularly new and ‘scary’ things, has undergone a great shift.
“The domino effect” as my mentor used to put it.
Choose one goal, one area, one part. Become selective. Focus on that section and master just that. It may take you a few hours, weeks, or even a few months, but once you dominate it, you will dominate a lot of other areas automatically. You become bigger; you expand your limits; you concretize your core competencies; build your skills and impact everything around you.
Figure out what you want to do, select one area and just try it.
The Achologist is the official online publication for Achology, the Academy of Modern Applied Psychology for professional practitioners and life coaches.
