This is Why and How We Instinctively Seek Love and Connection
Explaining attachment, authenticity, disconnection, and healing
Life and love are hard. We have patterns and bad habits that seem unexplainable. Or, we get into relationships and can’t seem to stay connected to our partner or ourselves. Why?
These patterns of attention-seeking and disconnection are adopted out of the need to survive. Our lives literally depend on it. Let’s take a look at why.
Attachment — Connection to Others
Newborns have no way of regulating their nervous systems or taking care of themselves. Without being held, loved, nurtured, and protected, a baby would die within twenty-four hours.
Attachment (i.e. connection to a caregiver), is therefore our first fundamental human need. It’s critical for our survival.
Parents who are physically present and emotionally attuned will respond to the child’s needs in a healthy way. They provide the necessary protection, skin-to-skin contact, and also support developmentally appropriate autonomy.
When they drop the parenting ball, they recognize it and quickly repair the misattunement.
