But Wait, There’s More! Starting (or returning to) Therapy in the New Year
We’re no strangers to the “New Year, New Me” marketing. Everyone does it. We’re all intoxicated at the thought of a clean slate, an opportunity to be our best selves, and for some of us, even the fantasy of being a completely different person. As ADHDers we say it every year: “This is the year I’ll get it together!” What if this is really your YEAR?
Amidst the chaos of thoughts and the weight of past experiences, the prospect of starting therapy might seem like a distant beacon of hope. What if this year becomes the turning point — an opportunity to embrace therapy, reframe narratives, and unearth the resilience within while addressing the complexities of ADHD and its effects? What if this is the year when you finally harness the tools to navigate it all and make life a bit more bearable? The decision to engage in therapy isn’t just about ‘getting it together,’ but about embracing a journey of understanding, healing, and empowerment. Therapy ultimately helps you understand yourself. And when we’re dealing with something like ADHD we must understand ourselves if we’re to ever communicate to others what we need. We have to know first or we won’t know what to ask for! As the calendar flips to a new year, many individuals consider setting resolutions, aspiring to improve their well-being, and seek positive changes. Maybe getting yourself a guide would help you actually accomplish this in the upcoming year. Whether you’re IN therapy or considering therapy challenges can arise.
While the path to finding the right therapist might be challenging, the benefits of therapy for neurodivergent individuals, as well as for everyone, are immense. Therapy can offer:
Coping Strategies: Therapists provide tools and coping mechanisms tailored to individual needs, assisting in managing challenges associated with neurodivergent conditions or past trauma. This is particularly true for neurodivergent individuals as the right therapist can help you tailor the coping skills you might encounter every day to things that will work for the neurodivergent brain. Things like dialectical behavior, cognitive behavior, and even meditation can be helpful on the surface but can be that much better when tweaked just a little to work better with the ADHD or Autistic brain.
Emotional Support: Therapy offers a safe environment to process emotions, reducing anxiety, stress, and feelings of isolation. It can be extremely useful to have an unbiased listener with only your best interests at heart. A good therapist can help you understand why you’re processing the way you are, that your concerns are valid, and can help you feel fully supported in your struggles in a way that someone more invested in the situation might not be able to do for you.
Self-Understanding and Growth: Through therapy, individuals gain self-awareness, fostering personal growth, and enhancing self-esteem. This is particularly important for ADHD and other divergent brains. It’s even more important if you’re late diagnosed. There’s a lot of untangling and unlearning when one doesn’t understand oneself. It’s totally doable and tends to be less painful and faster with an educated guide.
Relationship Enhancement: Therapy can improve communication skills and relationships, benefiting both personal and professional interactions. When you understand yourself, how you think, what you need, and what’s tripping you up, it would be natural for your relationships to improve as an impact of this.
So if therapy is so great, what stops people from going?
Therapy is a powerful tool for mental health and personal growth, yet despite its numerous benefits, many individuals encounter obstacles that prevent them from seeking the support they need. Recognizing these barriers is crucial in understanding why some people hesitate or refrain from pursuing therapy and in helping yourself get to the office in a timely manner:
1. Stigma and Misconceptions: Society’s lingering stigma surrounding mental health issues often discourages individuals from seeking therapy. Misconceptions, fear of judgment, or concerns about being labeled as “weak” or “crazy” can prevent people from seeking the help they require. Some people have even told me they don’t feel “sick enough” to go! Therapy is for everyone- we do everything from severe mental illness, to getting to know yourself better, to once monthly maintenance of someone to talk to. What happens is completely up to you and your therapist and nobody else.
2. Cost and Accessibility: Financial constraints and limited accessibility to mental health services are significant barriers. Therapy can be expensive, and not everyone has access to affordable options or mental health services in their area. Be aware that there are a lot of organizations that can help with the upfront costs. To name a few, The Trevor Project helps with free and accessible therapy for LGBTQ + individuals, openpathcollective.org is a collection of therapists who post their sliding scale slots, NDtherapists.com is a directory of neurodivergent therapists, many with lived experience and all who keep cost in mind, and public health and online sources are also helpful.
3. Fear of Opening Up: Opening up about personal struggles and vulnerabilities to a stranger can be daunting. Fear of being misunderstood, invalidated, or feeling too exposed can deter us from seeking therapy. Just remember that we’re used to guiding you through this and that therapy happens in your own time. I encourage you to not let this get in your way if you want to go!
4. Cultural and Social Barriers: Cultural beliefs and societal norms surrounding mental health can influence one’s decision to seek therapy. In some cultures, seeking mental health support is stigmatized or considered unnecessary, impacting an individual’s willingness to pursue therapy. Don’t let others opinions get in the way of a happy life. If you’re struggling, others opinions are just that. YOU have to live with this and if you need help then help is available. It doesn’t make you weak, it makes you human.
5. Lack of Time: Busy schedules and time constraints can make it challenging to prioritize therapy. Juggling work, family responsibilities, and other commitments often leaves little time for self-care, including therapy sessions. This one is a bit tough in that you just have to make the decision that you get to be a priority. Therapy is anywhere from one to four hours per week depending on where you are in the journey. Surely you can find four hours in a week for yourself?
6. Previous Negative Experiences: Past negative experiences with therapy or mental health professionals might create a reluctance to revisit therapy. A previous lack of connection with a therapist or feeling unheard can discourage individuals from trying therapy again. First, on behalf of all of us I want to say I’m sorry that was your experience. Beyond that, I’d encourage you to try again. A therapist that is a good fit can make all the difference in the world, and might even help heal that past bad experience for you!
7. Belief in Self-Reliance: Some people believe they should handle their problems independently, seeing therapy as a sign of weakness rather than strength. This self-reliant mindset can hinder them from seeking external support and ultimately set them up for disaster. Part of relying on yourself is being able to trust yourself to make the right decisions for yourself- and this includes knowing your limitations and knowing when to call in outside help.
8. Lack of Awareness or Understanding: Limited knowledge about the benefits of therapy or available mental health resources can be a barrier. Without proper information, individuals may not recognize the potential positive impact therapy could have on their lives. Some people find therapy frivolous, self indulgent, or just plain silly. Therapy is so much more than healing for the “crazy,” in fact, my main goal as a therapist is to assist people in not getting to that place!
Addressing these barriers involves breaking down misconceptions, promoting mental health awareness, and enhancing accessibility to affordable and culturally sensitive mental health services. Understanding that seeking therapy is a courageous step towards self-improvement and emotional well-being is vital in dismantling these obstacles. It’s important to acknowledge that these barriers are valid and differ from person to person. Overcoming them might take time, patience, and a supportive environment. However, recognizing and understanding these barriers is the first step towards encouraging more individuals to consider and pursue therapy for their mental health needs and this ultimately means a healthier and more inclusive and understanding world for all. Shouldn’t that be our goal?
Beyond those who are considering therapy for the first time, or picking it up again after a long hiatus, we also have a population of people who have taken a break during the holiday season and might fear going back. After the holiday season, some individuals might find it challenging to resume therapy sessions- yes, it’s a thing. The abrupt shift from relaxation to routine can feel overwhelming, causing individuals to hesitate or even delay returning to therapy. It’s vital to understand that this pause doesn’t diminish the progress made or the therapeutic relationship established. Your therapist understands the difficulties associated with returning after a break and is there to support your reintegration.
Yet, even when you want to go back, the transition from the holiday season to resuming therapy can pose challenges, and this adjustment period might deter individuals from returning to their therapeutic journey. It’s crucial to acknowledge that taking a break from therapy during the festive season is common, and returning to therapy afterward is not just acceptable but often encouraged. Usually there’s more work to do! If you’re embarrassed or struggling to go back I encourage you to push through and head back to the office. We’re experienced in this and we can guide you back into the process. Everyone needs a break now and then and that’s just fine!
Deciding to start of returning to therapy in the new year signifies a commitment to one’s well-being. It’s a courageous step toward personal growth, self-discovery, and improved mental health. Remember, it’s absolutely okay to resume therapy after taking a break, and your therapist is there to support and guide you through this journey. And if you’re new, know that we welcome you with open arms and are waiting to help guide you in making the next year the best it possibly can be for you!
As you navigate the challenges of finding the right therapist and embracing therapy’s benefits, remember that prioritizing your mental health is a valuable investment in yourself, empowering you to lead a more fulfilling life in the coming year and beyond. There’s nothing wrong with seeking help in reaching your goals, whether it be at work, in the gym, or simply investing in yourself. And from your therapist to you - We’ll see you soon and we’re looking forward to it!
