Yuki’s #repTour Experience
Stories from my summer 2018 Taylor Swift concerts
I wrote this story in “Swiftie” (i.e. Taylor Swift fan) lingo for my online Swiftie friends, but because Keenan asked to include this in his blog, I’ve tried my hardest to define as many terms as I can in the footnotes at the bottom of the post (there are a lot, wow!)
It’s been 2 weeks since my last #reptour¹ show, 1 year since the social media blackout², and 4 years since #shakeitoff³. It’s time I shared stories and highlights from my summer 2018 #reptour experience at #reptourfoxborough & #reptourtoronto!
Prep for the concert started out with a 40hr door-to-door transit from Singapore to Toronto, then a 15hr overnight bus ride from Toronto to Boston… it was a whirlwind of sleepless fidgeting and crazy jetlag — but none of the exhaustion mattered because I was so, SO excited to finally be traveling to the concerts I’ve spent 8 months counting down to. I got about 2 hours of sleep right before my first concert at #reptourfoxborough night 1; I’d spent most of the night tossing and turning with excitement. I cried because I kept imagining the things I’d say to Taylor if I ever met her. I had high hopes but no expectations — I didn’t want to spend my concert worrying about #reproom⁴.
I got up around 7am to freak out online with my fellow online stans and eventually started getting ready in my #delicate dress⁵. I’ve danced in this dress through South Korea, Japan, Thailand, and Singapore (see #travelingandtwirling⁶) and it felt so dramatic to finally put it on for a Taylor show. The most difficult bit of prep I had to do on the day of was creating a glitter snake on my left arm, but it was totally worth it because I loved the way it turned out! I wanted to get to the stadium ridiculously early (I was dying of excitement) so my boyfriend Keenan and I grabbed a quick Subway sandwich and hurried over in an Uber. (Four bites of that sandwich was the entirety of what I ate that day, and I was fine until after the concert because I started getting dizzy from hunger.)
Usually I make my Twitter posts with a bit of planning, but I was so excited about my first show that I spontaneously posted a photo of myself with the 13 I’d Sharpied onto my hand⁷. AND TO MY COMPLETE SHOCK, TAYLOR NATION ENDED UP RETWEETING THIS POST⁸! I DIED AND WENT TO CLOUD 13 AND NEVER CAME BACK DOWN FOR THE REST OF THE DAY… I’ll never forget the feeling. Within the past month, I’ve also had The Swift Life⁹ like one of my posts AND honor 2 other posts on the Swiftsend Feed — and all 3 posts were about my 2 tour outfits. Knowing this, my hopes for that special hug¹⁰ shot up.
I arrived at Gillette Stadium just before 2pm and took a bunch of photos with the #getawayshop¹¹ official merch truck, of the stadium, and at a couple radio booths. Keenan bought me some early birthday presents at the #getawayshop: the grey corduroy tour hat, tour book, 2 tour light sticks, and a #reptourfoxborough tour city patch.
After the merch shopping came one of the best parts of the day: I started meeting and talking to Swifties, taking photos with their gorgeous outfits and freaking out about the show with them. This is the first era in which I’ve had an online presence before the tour, so it’s the first time I’ve connected with so many Swifties from all over the world. It was the best decision because I ended up interacting with so many incredible people and felt so personally connected to this kindhearted, creative, fun community. I’d made so many amazing memories before the show even started!
Even when it started pouring before the gates opened, I was too elated to really even care about getting wet, and ended up getting soaked and shivering. The rain didn’t last long though. We headed inside the gates at around 5.30 to take photos at the throne — there was a long line but it moved quickly and we got some polaroids as souvenirs. (We later got a bunch more Instax photos at #reptourtoronto too!)
Then I saw the stadium in person for the first time, and I completely freaked out about the size of the stage. It is GIGANTIC. MAJESTIC. SO IMPRESSIVE. Keenan and I stumbled into our nosebleed seats right before Charli XCX opened… I seemed to have memorized my seat numbers by heart for this show. Our seats turned out to be in the front row of the upper part of our section, and in the aisle! Though we were so high up from the floor, these seats were perfect because it made my flailing — ahem, dancing — much less restricted and I was able to go all out.
Charli XCX and Camila Cabello were absolutely incredible; I’ve never had as much fun at a tour opening. Charli had so much energy and got us jumping around like crazy; Camila was all smiles and so full of emotion. We saw 2 Swifties in the next section get upgraded by Taylor Nation and got so excited about the fact that Taylor’s team does sometimes visit the highest of the nosebleeds! By the end of the tour openers, I was gasping for breath and realized how unfit I was for the full-on cardio workout I was to have that day. But then Mariah Carey’s Obsessed came on, Joan Jett’s Bad Reputation started playing, and I started screaming like crazy again. Taylor’s introductory video montage came on and when the word “reputation” started repeating itself, I knew we were seconds from seeing Taylor and I started full-on crying. How was the moment finally here? I nearly passed out when the stage parted to either side and her silhouette showed up on the screens. There was smoke everywhere. The crowd was deafening. I died.
I’d seen countless videos of the show, but it is NOTHING compared to being there in person. Ironically, it felt unreal to be seeing her live. I stayed completely off my phone during the concert (which threw off a lot of people because I was ALWAYS online before my shows) and had the absolute best time of my life, living every moment to its fullest. I had never danced so hard in my life. I smacked 4 or 5 people in the head with my light stick, despite being in the aisle. Our nosebleed seats allowed us to see the whole stadium light up with the wristbands… it was a glimmering sea of stars that night.
Hearing “123 LET’S GO BITCH”¹² and screaming it gave me so much life; hearing 22 acoustic live for the first time in my life gave me chills; being the only person in my section to scream “Boston” during the Blank Space loop¹³, going crazy during Should’ve Said No, and singing along to Long Live made me feel so proud. And then she came out with a sparkly jacket I’D NEVER SEEN BEFORE. It could only mean one thing. And sure enough, HAYLEY KIYOKO POPPED ONTO STAGE TO SING CURIOUS AND WE ALL COLLECTIVELY FREAKED THE HELL OUT. My first #reptour show and we get a surprise guest? Is this even real life?
When we got to Don’t Blame Me, I started smacking Keenan multiple times in anticipation of her crazy vocals… and of course, she delivered. The same way she does everytime. I got goosebumps. I was trying to catch my breath between every single song, but the woman has mastered the art of transitions and costume changes — I didn’t have time to breathe before she slayed me time and time again. Everyone around me only knew the lyrics to the singles, and I’m usually quite self-conscious about public singing, but I didn’t care that night. I belted out all the lyrics and screamed with every bit of voice that I had. By the end, my voice got so hoarse.
The concert ended sooner than I’d hoped and I stayed in my seat to watch the bloopers until the last possible minute (how cute is she when she does the “boop” in Gorgeous every time the song *dings*?!?!). It took me a while to get back to our AirBnB and I instantly fell asleep, having not felt this exhausted in a really, really long time. And so, so happy. Even though I had gotten my #reproom hopes up before the concert, it hardly crossed my mind during the show because I was having so much fun.
A couple days after the show, I started coughing. A lot. And then I started feeling really weak and got a fever. It felt like the end of a really, really good roller coaster ride. There was a moment when I cried a lot because I couldn’t believe what was happening: I’d gotten myself really sick before my next 2 shows, the ones I was most excited about because they’re happening in Canada, one of my home countries. Shows that I’ve been preparing for months. I concluded that these things just happen sometimes and there was nothing I could do about it except make the best of my time at the shows. I realize that I am still incredibly lucky to be able to even go to a show, let alone 3 shows. After an uncomfortable overnight bus back to Toronto, I spent my birthday at the doctor’s office and in bed, finding that I had a throat infection that couldn’t be treated with meds, and that I had to wait it out. I knew I didn’t take care of myself enough at Gillette, so this time I made sure I rested lots and ate properly before the concerts. Swifties sent me so many birthday wishes and I was incredibly overwhelmed with love.
I spent the day before #reptourtoronto night 1 finishing up my concert sign and my excitement started to build up again. Tons of friends kept saying that there was no way I wouldn’t meet Taylor in Toronto, which was so incredibly sweet, but I didn’t let it become an expectation because I didn’t want to have my biggest dream become a disappointment — my goal was to enjoy my last 2 #reptour shows. When the first show day rolled around, I was so excited that my sickness took a backseat; miraculously I was feeling way better! The moment I arrived at Rogers Centre in my #LWYMMD dancer costume¹⁴, I started talking to Swifties and recognizing SO many people from online; tons of people came up to me screaming my name (which was honestly so amazing and super bizarre); I was so thrilled to see so many creative costumes and signs. I spent hours meeting, hugging, and taking photos with these amazing people and felt so proud… so Gatsby. I probably will for this whole year.¹⁵
Gates opened and I missed seeing Taylor Nation walk the floor before the openers because I was getting food, but I had enough time to dance with my friends to some of the bops playing in the background. This was my first #reptour experience on the floor and it was so amazing to see Charli and Camila performing so close to us!
Between Charli and Camila’s sets, my friend Utkarsh came to find me at my seat and dragged me over to Club Meredith, where Taylor’s dancers Maho Udo, Christian Owens, and Mark Villaver were just chilling. WE GOT A PHOTO WITH THEM BEFORE THEY LEFT TO PREP FOR THE SHOW… OH MY GOD!¹⁶
After going crazy for the openers (some people can verify I went insane), it was time for Taylor! This time I WAS SO CLOSE TO HER WHEN SHE WALKED TO THE END OF THE CATWALK. I was watching her actual self instead of the screen!!! I felt so connected to her performances and so much more emotional than I did at #reptourfoxborough; it was a whole new experience.
Near the beginning of the show I caught a glimpse of Andrea¹⁷ and Shawn Mendes in Club Meredith one section over, but I felt shy and also didn’t want to bombard them while they were enjoying the show so I didn’t approach them. I was having an amazing time and my eyes were completely transfixed on Taylor. When it came time for the surprise song¹⁸, I was ridiculously excited. When she finished playing Dancing With Our Hands Tied, she didn’t give a speech and launched straight into the surprise song — something I wasn’t prepared for! The introductory guitar chords weren’t obviously associated to any song I could think of, but then she started singing “Oh oh”. By the second “oh”, I screamed “OUT OF THE WOODS! OUT OF THE WOODS!” to Keenan and many startled seatmates… and sure enough, after several more “oh”s she started singing the first line and the crowd went berserk. I adore this song!
After some memorable moments screaming “Blue Jays!” repeatedly during Blank Space, Taylor stepped into the snake skeleton¹⁹ and flew almost directly over us during Bad Blood. I lost my entire wig²⁰— I’ve never been so close to her my entire life. There is a video of me jumping like mad but I don’t think it should be shared with the public…
This night was the night I recited Why She Disappeared²¹ with Taylor and bawled uncontrollably. This night, I felt every emotion Taylor described and it broke me to realize how much pain she must have been through when she was in hiding. I cried until Getaway Car ended… and that’s when I screamed one last time and completely lost 100% of my voice. I spent the rest of the show scream-breathing the lyrics. My sickness had finally caught up to me and all the screaming I did earlier had worsened my throat infection — by now I was unable to have a conversation with anyone and I knew it was going to last until after my last show, so I got quite sad as I was collecting the tour confetti after the end of the show. If for some incredible reason I ended up meeting Taylor, I wouldn’t be able to talk to her. I decided, at that time, that I didn’t want to meet her the next day, not under these circumstances… I told myself that I would meet her another day, another time… maybe next era. Maybe I’d be able to say everything I want to say to her then.
That night was very rough. I got so sick on the tram ride home and had a hard time sleeping… I’d gone too hard at the concert. But no regrets.
#reptourtoronto night 2 started very late for me. I really needed the sleep for my health, and it took me a really long time to get ready and get into my #delicate dress with a migraine. I missed 2 pre-show Swiftie meetups and felt really disappointed about that… and then I got stuck in traffic on the way to the show. The day wasn’t looking up so far.
I arrived at the stadium around 5:30pm… and found out that my floor seats didn’t actually exist. My entire row didn’t exist! Rogers Centre staff said that they had to move Club Meredith²² around to adjust it to the venue, so some seats got moved around in the process. Feeling really nervous, we went to talk to the ticket staff and after a bit of searching they gave us new tickets. Our new seats turned out to be a few rows in front of our original row — good news! When we arrived at our seats, we discovered that our row was the one directly in front of Club Meredith — amazing news! We were probably about 5–6 seats away from the tent so we wouldn’t be able to see into the Club. We started chatting to two girls in our row, who graciously offered to switch seats with us because they didn’t mind where their seats were. WE SAID YES AND NOW OUR SEATS WERE DIRECTLY IN FRONT OF CLUB MEREDITH, WHERE ANDREA MIGHT SHOW UP. This was absolutely mind-blowing news! We couldn’t believe our luck.
I don’t know if it was the excitement or what, but my sickness took a backseat again. I still didn’t have a voice, but I still roamed around the stadium floor to meet people (apologizing a lot for not being able to have a conversation). I talked to some lucky Swifties that had just met Taylor the night before and at the pre-show meet and greet, and they said the same thing: go and talk to Andrea! I was already planning to interact with Andrea tonight because I absolutely adore her loving nature and generosity for our fandom. When I heard what the Swifties said, my #reproom hopes started shooting up. I knew I wasn’t at the concert to meet Taylor, and I knew that I didn’t have a voice, but with fate putting me in front of Club Meredith and with all the incredible Swifties that were rooting for me, I couldn’t help but feel this way.
We watched the stage screens part and Taylor appeared for my third and last #reptour concert. But I was quickly distracted from the stage because I noticed bigger screams coming from behind me. Looking back, I saw ANDREA SWIFT, MAMA SWIFT HERSELF, WALK INTO CLUB MEREDITH WITH A HUGE SMILE. I froze, my hands flew to my mouth, and I started crying because I didn’t expect her to show up right at that moment. I was the first person she spotted walking in and I think because she saw me getting so emotional, she actually reached out one arm to pull me into a hug over the fence. At this point, I was blacking out. She said something into my ear like “it’s so nice to see you” or something like that, but I don’t quite remember. I couldn’t say anything back to her — I was in shock, and I had no voice and there was no way she could hear me whisper. So I hugged her and tried to savor the moment despite my shock. After my hug she continued to hug many others in the Club (I think they were Taylor Nation staff, but I’m not sure). I was over the moon.
While Andrea hung out in the club, we went absolutely crazy dancing with Taylor — just like we did last night. She left shortly after the first couple songs to walk around the stadium. Because of my hug with Andrea, this night had quickly become the best of my #reptour shows and I didn’t know how it could get any better — until Taylor slayed me again. And again. She sung So It Goes, which means I’ve now heard the entire Reputation album live. She played Come Back Be Here, which puts me in the only crowd that has experienced this beautiful, moving song live. I cried. A lot. I’d wanted to go to the barricade both nights of #reptourtoronto, but I didn’t feel well enough to venture into the crowds. She came back to the main stage and Andrea showed up in Club Meredith during Bad Blood/Should’ve Said No, to many cheers and screams. She was in the middle of a conversation when her eyes lit up and she pointed to the stage and said “I can’t miss this”. That’s when Taylor had showed up in a NEW SPARKLY JACKET. AGAIN. HOW DOES SHE KEEP DOING THIS TO MY HEART? AND THEN BRYAN FREAKIN ADAMS SHOWED UP TO SING SUMMER OF 69 AND THE ENTIRE STADIUM SHOOK. This was such a huge surprise and it totally brought my concert experience over the top. NOTHING is ever going to top this (until the next Taylor show perhaps)!!!
Between songs, Keenan asked Andrea for a photo of her and I. Security was quick to block us off and say no, but Andrea smiled warmly and said yes to us, gesturing that this was totally okay. The security guard stepped aside and Andrea put her hand on my shoulder for a photo that I will keep forever, will have framed, and will look at with so much pride. When they point to the pictures, I’ll tell them her name…²³
When it was time for This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things, I started feeling so much happiness and sadness at the same time. An incredible night was ending. Andrea was still there, dancing and singing along with Taylor, being incredibly supportive. I suddenly became aware that I wasn’t going to be meeting Taylor today — and I was completely okay with that. I later found out that there wasn’t #reproom that night… I guess these things do happen. At the line “here’s to my mama”, a bunch of us Swifties turned to face Andrea to give her all the love we had. She responded by making a hand heart on her chest — AN ACTUAL TAYLOR SWIFT HAND HEART²⁴. It was the sweetest moment. She walked out towards backstage soon after and that was the last I saw of her.
The concert ended. I started thinking of all the things I should’ve done — I should’ve given Andrea a letter to Taylor. I’d already written my letter, but didn’t have it on me. I should’ve given Andrea the next best thing — my sign. It has photos of me dancing in my delicate dress on my round-the-world backpacking trip, and a short message to Taylor. I should have made an effort to mouth “I love you” to Andrea. I felt sad thinking about all these things that I should’ve done. But then I realized I was being too hard on myself. How lucky was I that I got to hug Andrea that night? I’ll have to remain hopeful that someday, I’ll have a truly special moment with Taylor or Andrea.
My #reptour shows were some of the best nights of my entire life. I sung, I screamed, I cried, I danced my heart out. How is it possible that I went to 3 shows and saw 2 surprise guests? How is it possible that I paid to see Taylor Swift, but I also saw Charli XCX, Camila Cabello, Hayley Kiyoko, and Bryan Adams perform? My post-concert depression is in full swing, but I’ll have my photos, videos, new friendships, and memories to hold onto forever. And the very catchy “OHoh OHoh OHoh OHoh OHoh OHoh OHohohOHOHoh” chorus from the end of King of My Heart, which refuses to leave my brain especially when I’m trying to sleep. As well as the way my boyfriend Keenan bursts into “123 LET’S GO BITCH” every time he gets hyped about something these days.
Follow @yukitheswiftie on Twitter/Tumblr/Instagram/The Swift Life for more (if I haven’t already scared you all off with my level of obsession)!
Footnotes:
¹ #reptour is short for the “reputation Stadium Tour”, Taylor’s fifth and current concert tour. “reputation” is her 6th studio album.
² The social media blackout refers to an event that occurred on August 18, 2017, when all her accounts (Facebook, Instagram, etc.) were cryptically wiped completely free of previous content and went “dark” — thereby breaking the internet because it implied that new music was coming. This date marks the beginning of her “reputation” era. She announced her first single 5 days later.
³ Shake It Off is one of Taylor’s biggest singles from her album “1989”.
⁴ Rep Room is the name of Taylor’s meet-and-greet area. Taylor is one of the few artists you cannot pay to meet; lucky fans are picked from online social media or from the concert crowds for these pre- and post-show meet and greet sessions. There are many ways to get picked (e.g. awesome outfits, interesting online presence, going all out dancing during the concert) but there is no specific formula. Fans get picked by Taylor Nation (Taylor’s official management company) or Andrea Swift (Taylor Swift’s mom herself). Meeting Taylor is a Swiftie’s ultimate dream; and the doors to #reproom are the gates to heaven.
⁵ Delicate is one of Taylor’s #1 singles from reputation. She wears an iconic blue tassled dress in her music video. My blue dress is inspired by this dress.
⁶ I’ve done multiple photoshoots in my blue dress and my Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram, and The Swift Life posts related to this can be found under the hashtag #travelingandtwirling
⁷ 13 is Taylor’s lucky number, meaning that it has become many fans’ lucky number. Taylor Sharpie’d a 13 onto her hand every night of her previous concert tours, and many Swifties going to concert emulate this.
⁸ Being noticed online by Taylor Nation is the next best thing to being noticed online by Taylor herself. Taylor is known to personally interact with fans through her social media accounts — and Taylor Nation does the same. It doesn’t happen too often, so when it happens, it is a big deal. Many fans keep track of how many “notices” they’ve received. It carries a lot of significance because each notice means that Taylor’s team may know who you are, thereby increasing your chances of getting picked to meet Taylor herself.
⁹ The Swift Life is a social media app designed specifically for Swifties to interact. It is an honor to have Taylor, Taylor Nation, or The Swift Life accounts “like” one of your posts (it happens very rarely) because it shows up on Taylor’s page — meaning Taylor can see your post and find out who you are. Posts worthy of interest are hand-picked for the “Swiftsend Feed”, which is a page where Taylor can scroll through to find posts to like. Any post on the Swiftsend feed can be seen by every active app user.
¹⁰ A hug with Taylor!
¹¹ The Getaway Shop is the name of the official merchandise truck for the tour.
¹² “123 let’s go bitch” is not meant to be offensive in any way; it’s an inside joke between Taylor and Swifties. It’s something that fans scream right after the first verse of the song Delicate to hype Taylor up. Taylor caught onto the joke and now counts 123 with her fingers on stage every show!
¹³ During her 1989 World Tour, Taylor used a repeater to loop the name of each city she toured in during her song “Blank Space”. This is known as the Blank Space loop. In Foxborough she sang “Boston” and in Toronto she sang “Blue Jays”.
¹⁴ Taylor wears an iconic black outfit during her dancing scenes in the music video for Look What You Made Me Do, her biggest music video to date. My costume was a recreation of this outfit.
¹⁵ “Feeling so Gatsby for that whole year…” is a line from Taylor’s song “This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things”.
¹⁶ Taylor’s dancers are a big deal to her. They are also a big deal to the fandom, and many Swifties follow them online and a handful know them by name.
¹⁷ Andrea Swift is Taylor’s mom. She is a star in the fandom, hugely celebrated because of her generosity and kindness. She travels with Taylor to almost every show of every tour, since Taylor started her first tour (she’s now on her fifth). Andrea also meets Swifties during concerts and hands out free meet and greet passes. Meeting Andrea is a huge deal in the fandom.
¹⁸ Taylor has a predefined setlist for every show on this tour, except for one “surprise” song that she performs on one of her B-stages (smaller stages at the back of the stadium floor that she flies to on gondolas). These surprise songs can be from any of her previous albums or special songs she has collaborated on with other artists… meaning there is a chance you can potentially hear a 2006 song in 2018. Crazy!
¹⁹ A flying gondola shaped like a snake skeleton.
²⁰ To “lose your wig” means something crazy/exciting just happened that shocked you so much that your figurative wig fell off.
²¹ A heartfelt poem Taylor wrote about her time away from the public. She was severely bullied in 2016, called a “snake”, and publicly humiliated despite complete lack of proof. As a huge laugh in her haters’ faces, she has taken back the narrative and now uses snakes as the main motif of her reputation era.
²² Club Meredith is a tent on the stadium floor where Taylor Swift’s family and VIP (e.g. celebrities) hang out during the show.
²³ “When they point to the pictures, please tell them my name…” is a line from Taylor’s song Long Live, which she wrote as a tribute to her band and her fans back in 2010.
²⁴ One of Taylor’s iconic poses on stage is with her hand heart, which is… you guessed it, making a heart shape with your hands.
