Unapologetically Plastic, Artisanal Buns

Words Affect Us, Deeply…

Jordan Staniscia
2 min readSep 30, 2013

On September 10th at 10:22 am, Phil Schiller took the stage to announce the iPhone 5C.

Good morning everyone, I’m really happy to be here because I have the great honor and privilege to introduce these two new iPhones products to you. And the first one is called iPhone 5C.

After using words like Stunning, Incredible, Gorgeous, Smart, and Vibrant to describe the new device, the video rolls. Jony Ive is shown onscreen.

“iPhone 5C is beautifully, unapologetically plastic.”

My disappointment about the lower-specced phone fell away. In that moment, I believed him. Its plastic and proud! “I am plastic, hear me roar!” Each phone shouted in my imagination.

Then reality settles in and you realize that a meaningless adjective made something I’d normally consider boring sound phenomenal. Every other piece of plastic in your life has yet to apologize, and this one was no different. And you hate plastic.

Last Thursday, I stepped into The Melt to see that they had a “Madagascar” Vanilla Bean Milkshake on the menu. In 2007, 60% of the world’s vanilla came from Madagascar. You’ve had Madagascar Vanilla your entire life. But I’d like the exotic vanilla just described.

Super Duper Burger shows their buns off.

What could wrap around a beef patty and make it sound even better? Super Duper Burger believes it’s an artisanal bun. The idea of the average bun, maybe a little dry and highly likely to give you the hiccups transforms into something I’d like to sink my teeth into. This one is by René Magritte.

Do I buy things because they have unparalleled value? Would I rather buy from a boutique than a store? Have meaningless words like this convinced me to eat what I eat every day?

The truth is, I am convinced easily by adjectives.

Words convince us, deeply.

--

--