Society Destroy’s Mental Illness In Humanity

Magic!!!

When it comes to wanting things, we must learn, accept, respect and understand the logic of putting enough effort to get the things we want. If we want something bad enough, we have to work for it. After all:

Dreams don’t work unless you do.

And so I’ve come to my own senses to work on a new and more challenging level with this and where I’ve reached with my mental health recovery, where I work more on my blog posts ahead before their posted date with a fair and decent amout of time and the rest on reading the books I have. Which I think I’ll start on possibly reading “Emotional Intelligence” by Daniel Goleman.

As well as working on my booklet that Erin, my previous counsellor I was seeing last year; in which I’ll be working on every day. And so once I have completed that booklet, I’ll start working on the DBT booklet given by my most recent counsellor who I met with a couple time in March or April this year.

But boy, have I come a long way with my mental health recovery. So proud of myself, and I am in which truly grateful and lucky to have those who were there by my side through it all. Truly am proud to have had them by my side through it all and continue to be! Thank you!

When I really want something from the universe, I choose to be optimistic.” ~ DeAnn, The Arrangement

For as long as I’ve been recovering with my mental health issues, I’ve come to say that I’d like to someday celebrate my recovery of 2 years, and aiming/hoping for someday this year (2017)! Really do believe more than enough that I truly deserve to celebrate all that I’ve accomplished along with all that I’ve been through to get to where I am today.

Again, I wouldn’t have done it without all those who have been there by my side through it all. Couldn’t be any prouder and happier for all thes people including myself for making the first step in seeking help and working through my recovery one day, one step, one moment at a time.

I believe that we all can look at mental illness as a good thing regardless of all the suffering in silence, painful yet unbearable moments and everything else that is viewed as the negative side. We can look and focus at what our experiences suffering and living with mental illness has impacted our lives in great ways.

For example, being able to practice gratitude, mindfulness, self care, self love and emotional intelligence along with anything else anyone could add to that list. For me, I started practicing all thse things throughout my recovery and if it weren’t for my depression, I wouldn’t be all that normal and mentally healthy. For a few things to declare would be: taking things such as my mental health, emotions, health, my voice, friends and all those things which those who are less fortunate than we are; for granted.

Whatever doesn’t kill us made us stronger. – Scars, Tove Lo

Through all the suffering, unbearable pain and all else in which I knew I had to continue before getting better and my life improving as I improve myself each day, and even though my mental illness brought me to moments of feeling suicidal, I’m alive and it has in it’s own ways made me stronger. Along with all that I worked on in my recovery that made me stronger. I saw the lesson in each moment and continued to improve myself and change myself as each day come and went.

And with all that, I’m better for it all. And I am so damn proud of myself for all that I did to bring myself to where I am in my recovery today! And I’m more confident, content with my life and my recovery, and also very grateful, lucky and happy for everything. Through it all, great things came out of the bad.

Good things happen to positive people.

I chose to become more positive than I ever have been in order to have positive things be attracted to me. And with all that work I put in, it has been paying off gradually. And I intend to rewarding with more exericse, some reading, and more self care and self love!

Oh how much healthier I feel now that I’m taking better care of my mental health. I thought I was healthy after how well I was with motivating myself to stay fit diet and exercise wise; but I dind’t know about the importance of mental health. But of course with the lack of education that’s understandable on that end. But I still believe like many others that we need to fold mental health into the teaching curriculum in schools. Because students can really benefit greatly enough by the education.

Education is the most powerful weapon which you can use to change the world. – Nelson Mandela

Education and knowledge as well as intellgience can really do great things as long as we allow them to happen and to be impacted by them. And I’ve come to add here that I’ve educated myself well enough as well as still educating myself through books more rather than the internet. As well as all the knowledge I’ve gained from my experiences so far of 2 years and more to learn as each day comes and passes. And also the intelligence I’ve gained by emotional intelligence which I worked on through my experiences and being imapcted by the things they taught me.

I can’t imagine my life without all my hard work and all that I’ve gained to in which formed me into the person I have become today.

We all must go through the worst days in order to gain the best ones!

Through all those bad days I’ve been through, the best days or rather to say better days are here and are still getting better with time! And I’m still continuing with my progress and everything else as time passes.

And I know some days may be harder than the good ones to continue practicing self care and self love without the feeling of guilt given by my parents. But I’m gonna continue working on bettering myself on that and everything else which can improve more.

And to conclude here, yes I’ve been through a lot and so has anyone else living with mental illness and in our shameful society, but we all gotta stay strong. And do what’s best for us without giving into the pressure and power to feel that guilt that we are being selfish for taking care of ourselves on a level that society doesn’t seem to understand.

Put out the fire before igniting., next time your fighting” a lyric from Selena Gomez’s song: Kill Em With Kindness which I wasn’t being mindful enough of when it came to the events that happened today.

Mom threatened to kick me out, again, another threat of not going to my college graduation, and hearing my mom talking on the phone to my younger sister about taking another shift tomorrow night and calling her work for noticing them to give her shift back tomorrow or something, at that point I felt scared but more hurt by all I had done wrong to get that kind of result.

Boy was I scared and tearing up so much. But through it all, I managed to talk it out in a more calm, understanding manner with my dad and with my mom too! I was hurt of the actual possibility of not being able to go to my own college graduation. I didn’t just want to go because my mom didn’t go to hers, but for me too!

Still fighting that demon inside my brain in which I’m working on still each day to fight off; no more losing to the demon. I’m choosing to continue fight and battle at war with whatever I’m faced with.

But one thing’s for sure: I don’t believe in multitasking! It’s basically doing many things little bit at a time but at the same time. Doing so, means not being mindful and fully present in the moment.

Like this quote or reminder I have on my dresser: “if you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.

When it comes to mental health, I never knew the real importance of caring for oneself and for prioritizing mental health as my number one priority as well as many other things in which I’ve come to share that I’ve learned in just 2 years so far in my recovery.

With as important mental health truly is and as important it is to me, I’ve come a long way in 2 years and I’m so happy, confident with it all. And I feel so absolutely proud of myself for everything I’ve accomplished with my mental health recovery. Couldn’t have done it without everything and everyone I had for support minus my own family.

Living with mental illness is not at all what anyone would want to be part of their own life, in which we may not have control or a choice whether we do or not, but we have to accept it and I’ve done way more than just accept it, but also feel no shame and no feelings or failed attempts with doing all the things my parents wanted me to follow. Which I believe if I did, I would call that the path of self destruction and at the end is suicide, which no one wants. Which can be hard not to allow to happen if no one or not everyone is well aware and mindful of.

Living with mental illness is not at all what anyone may think or imagine it to be like especially in our society who shames everyone yet the mental health community for having a mental illness and to them viewing it as selfish, and other labels. But we all have it within ourselves to empower ourselves and each one another to take a stand and stand up for ourselves. We are not our illness, it doesn’t define us or make us any less of a human.

We are still human and we do no like to be treated like a puppet, or a robot. It’s time to empower ourselves and take back what’s rightfully ours. Its been long enough and we’ve let it get this bad, and its time we start and continue to take action in the mental health community to break this stigma once and for all. But of course with how big our population is in our world, that will takes years and we will see how we are progress wise in 5 years or so and go from the outcomes as we go along.

But we cannot be afraid. But being afraid can be a good thing, because it means you have something worth losing. And for me, I’m more than at that stage or point in my recovery and with my life. I’m 20 years old, I shouldn’t have my bank account linked to their account, like a joint account. So I’ve already ditched that account and transferred my money over to a new account where they cannot view with all my money back.

I should be able to make my own decisions without my parents and especially without them checking my blogs and bank accounts. Its invading my own privacy. It’s so wrong and I’m too old for that kind of treatment. So now and for many months now, maybe since I started my recovery 2 years ago, I’ve been making decisions for myself.

And that’s gonna remain, I’ve already made a new account where they can’t view or spy on my account, I’m not a teenager anymore. It’s more to do with empowering myself for better, healthier and the kind of change I’ve wanted, needed and deserve for long enough. This is what’s best for me. This is what I need and deserve!

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