I am proud of you always, no conditions!
Every child longs to hear this from their parents. These words can shape the child’s life in a way nothing else can.
They are to a kid what sunlight and water are to a plant. This is irrespective of where they are born, how they look and how much their parents earn.
In a result-oriented society, we expect a lot from today’s kids. We say ‘Failure is the stepping stone of success’ but we hardly believe in it. We judge their performances based on how many rewards they received. We don’t value the subtle benefits of learning through setbacks.
Our preconceived notions and judgments determine how we value our kids’ efforts. We fail to hide the disappointment on our faces when they don’t meet our expectations. Unknowingly, we hurt their aspirations due to our insecurities.
The truth is — neither the parents nor the kids can fully estimate their capabilities. So rather than judging them, our job is to support them in whatever they are driven to do.
Driven effort deserves appreciation irrespective of awards or medals. The proud feeling in the parents’ eyes can uplift and motivate a child through any setback. It gives them the self-belief and courage to follow their passion.
Expressing our love and support to them is the least we can do. Kids need this, especially, if they are going through a family crisis like divorce or loss of a parent. They will become strong and resilient to face the world if they believe they have the support system.
Yet, parents get swamped in their personal and work problems and forget to express their love. Many adults carry childhood hurts due to lack of parental support. Such adults, in turn, display the same parenting behavior towards their kids and the unhealthy pattern continues.
Lack of parental support sends children into a life of low self-worth and bad choices. Though many may survive the hard times and stand up on their feet, the wounds stay with them forever.
“It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men”
Frederick Douglass
Today’s kids face a complex world filled with multidimensional problems. They need all the strength they can get.
So, make a promise to your child -
I am proud of you always! There is no ‘IF’ or ‘But’ to this. It is unconditional. You have my approval to try new things and fail. You are allowed to make mistakes and learn from them. Any adversities you face in life, I am your rock. The world may change the way it looks at you but my love and faith in you would never change.
And, don’t forget to keep that promise. Our kids deserve this!
As an adult son or daughter, how would you feel if you heard this from your parents?
