So What’s Next?
Feeling so lost in life.
Did you know that the year 2020 is less than 5 months away?
When I was just a little girl, 2020 seems so far out of my reach but now, it’s approaching faster than ever before. 2020 will be the year I go to college, where I embark on the last lap of my education journey. It will be the year where I turn 20, which technically means that I’ll no longer be a teen anymore. As such, 2020 will be a year full of huge life changes which I hope I’ll be able to adapt to.
Entering a new phase in life is scary to me. It means leaving the past behind, both happy and sad memories. It means getting out of my comfort zone and try new things which I always avoid. It means accepting change, whether or not I want to.
The worst part of all is the feeling of uncertainty.
Which college should I go to? Which degree should I take? What kind of degree? What should I do before I turn 20?
Sadly, I have no concrete answers to those questions. I’m very indecisive because I’m terrified of making the wrong decisions. I’m afraid of screwing up the next few years of my life just because of a simple decision I’ve made. I’ve been scrolling through Reddit and reading about how people made the wrong decision in their college years which led to years of chaotic mess.
However, nevertheless, decisions have to be made. By February 2020, I have to submit my application form to the colleges I wish to enroll in. There’s no escaping it. Also, I realised that there’s no way of predicting the consequences of my decision. How would I know if my decision is right or wrong if I never have gone through with it?
To all those who are feeling lost right now, I just want to say that it’s normal to feel this way. To feel as if there are millions of pathways to take or as if there are none at all. But, you can’t live life like this all the time. Ultimately, in order to progress further in life, you have to make some sort of decision.
If you are confused over which option to pick, remember that only you have the power to choose. No one else can do it for you. What you can do is to weigh the pros and cons but don’t dwell on them too much. You won’t know what’s coming for you unless you experience it yourself.
On the other hand, if you feel like your future has nothing, then create something. If you can’t make it to college, then start working. If you can’t find work, find a hobby. Be active and don’t waste your time idling at home. Do something and eventually, you’ll come to find that your future is a little brighter than what you thought it’s going to be.
Life is unpredictable. Stop worrying and start doing.
