When Life Goes Sideways then Takes You Back in Time
When I was about ten years old, and while living in Texas, I remember reaching the conclusion that I could adapt to any environment. Be it city, country, desert, mountains or somewhere else, I felt I could be happy regardless. And it was probably true at that point in time. Much later though, I had become a strict urbanite — enjoying all the amenities and travel to far flung locations that lifestyle afforded.
From those heady years of the 1980s life took a sharp detour, most dramatically post 9/11. In late fall of 2001 my lifestyle mutated from urban to nomad, for about two years. Afterward, the landscape changed to suburban, and ultimately to somewhat rural. Population density quickly decreased from over a million down to 80K, then later to 20K…and finally to a little over 5K. The transition was neither seamless nor welcome until the last two moves.
New Place. New Home. New Peace.
Yet here I sit, at peace, probably for the very first time since early childhood. I didn’t expect to like this place. I randomly selected the area in hopes of finding a house that would meet our tight budget constraints — since our window of opportunity had closed in another county that had held such promise six or so months before.
This house was the only one that looked like the owners had put some work into it. As a matter of fact, it even looked cute and well cared for. So we placed an offer on it right away. It was after the offer was accepted that we researched the town and surrounding areas. What we learned didn’t alter our decision to move. Even the Sanford & Son junk collection in the lot next door didn’t change our minds, though I admit to feeling faint when I saw it (and the two abandoned properties across the street) for the first time. Ours was a very pragmatic decision.
Two months since move-in day I have a newly acquired appreciation for all that I see now. We have met both next door neighbors and we like them. Unlike those from the last hood, these neighbors are friendly sans the apparent need to be nosy or even downright personally invasive. The quiet of the houses across the street is soothing (as is the lack of railroad and military aircraft we dealt with before). The neighbor with the collection of building materials turns out to be an extremely hardworking and kind soul. The other neighbors are a minister and his wife.
The back side of our property butts up against an open area owned by one of our neighbors. That area in turn backs up to a road with a church across the street. Driving around the neighborhood I see mowed, sizable yards and a truly interesting mix of house styles. It has reopened my mind to embracing a different, and in this case slower, way of life.
Both my husband and I enjoy the lack of traffic and bad driver behavior. We find our little town more and more intriguing and are overjoyed at how genuinely friendly the locals are. We look forward to exploring the area more, especially the nearby lake. Recently we drove through a surprisingly charming town of 2,000 with a town square reminiscent of the one from Back to the Future.
Random Choices or Guided Fate?
At this juncture, all the seemingly random choices and even conscious decisions feel guided and in the best way. Time will tell, but in the meantime we will embrace all that this particular home has to offer.
This has been a very humbling journey, with more lessons likely to come. I personally have learned to appreciate quiet again. I thoroughly appreciate having time to cook and bake, hopefully to learn how to grow some vegetables. I want to write again, perhaps pick up my art as well. I want to further develop friendships with a few select people as well as perhaps make some new friends.
Coming Full Circle
The end of 2001 was the beginning of a surreal existence for me. But six years later I met the man who would change my life again. He encompasses everything I had long hoped to have in a life partner. He is the kind of friend I believed existed somewhere and that I deserved to have. He has taught me so much since we’ve been together. And now we are fashioning what we believe/hope will be our last home. For me it feels like circling back to that buoyant ten year-old version of myself, complete with the return to Texas. Regardless of what the future holds, this feels like the perfect place to be right now.
