How to communicate
To be more articulate…
So you’re here to find out how to communicate more effectively. Maybe you want to increase your confidence, be able to speak publicly, ask for a raise or ask someone out. The information in the following paragraphs will be split into four sections; Reading, writing, speaking and listening. Each will go into how to be more articulate as an individual and help you to communicate.
Before we delve into how to become more articulate, we first need to understand what it means. The definition of articulate, according to the Cambridge Dictionary is ‘Able to express thoughts and feeling easily and clearly, or showing this quality’ In essence, it means clear communication.
Reading –
The way that reading will help with articulation is to read aloud. This will help with your speaking and pronunciation of certain words and sentence structures. This may seem odd for those of you who like to read in your head, however, reading aloud helps you become a more fluid speaker as you become more comfortable with words and reading in a sentence. If you are smooth with reading aloud, you’ll become smooth with talking.
This is the best and probably fastest way to become more articulate/ fluid when speaking. The benefits of reading aloud far outweigh the effort it takes to do it. Some of the benefits are as followed: proper pronunciation of words, reading in a sentence (pausing slightly at commas and a bit longer at full stops), and confidence when speaking. A way to supercharge this is by reading aloud to someone else. This exercise will further your build confidence.
If you are trying to build up the habit of reading, read at a level you are comfortable with for a while and build up your focus. However, if you are a regular reader, don’t just read what you are comfortable with. Read harder reads to build up new neuropathways in your brain so you get used to how different sentences are formulated and structured. Don’t just stay with layman’s terms. Reading more difficult books means you will come across words that you may not understand that will give you a chance to learn and add more words to your arsenal of vocabulary.
Read to gain as much knowledge about topics you are interested in. You should also read about opposing opinions on the same topics to get a better understanding. The thing about most people today is that they don’t listen to learn, they listen to reply. If most people read opposing opinions on topics to understand where the other side is coming from, then there would be more debating and less arguing. Just because you are reading to understand, doesn’t mean you have to agree.
Keeping a narrow mind and only believing your point of view is right is a naïve, dangerous way to look at the world, as this oppresses other people’s freedom of speech. There is not just A and B, right and wrong, there are more possibilities. Both people can be right, both can also be wrong.
You can’t read everything everywhere, so this is where the next section comes into play: listening. What you miss by reading, you have a great chance of picking it up via listening. Everyone is different, and different people like different things, so listen to what they talk about.
“You don’t have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them.” — Ray Bradbury
Listening –
The way that listening will help with articulation is by picking up on the information and experience of others.
When listening to others, especially about topics you do not know very well or understand, listen to learn. You can’t spend every minute of every day reading. You’ll need to go to your job and communicate at some point, this is where listening comes in. Listening will still help you learn while socialising.
Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply.
Don’t just listen with your ears, listen with your eyes too. Look engaged, and take on board what other people are saying. When looking at others and paying attention to them while they are talking, you’ll find that you will take in more information. (It’s also polite and shows respect from your end). When people see you as a great listener, they will likely want to be friends with you or work with you. This can gain you a good reputation as someone who takes others seriously, in return others will listen to you and take you seriously. This also helps with networking.
Eye contact is my next point. This can be a real problem for people with confidence issues, however, when talking with individuals, maintain eye contact. It shows you are interested and confident. If you struggle to make eye contact, maintain it for a few seconds and gradually increase it over time. It will feel awkward at first, however, it is only you that will feel this awkwardness. The other person will not feel the same way you do and will most likely feel as if you are listening to them. They won’t think “This person is making eye contact with me, it feels so awkward”, they will think you care and are taking on board what they say. If you keep your eyes darting away or looking at the floor when talking, they will notice and will think “This person is unconfident and probably doesn’t care what I’m saying”.
Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. ― Roy T. Bennett
Write –
Writing is a big part of becoming more articulate, the reason for this is that, if you write, you come across words you may not regularly use but can be used to express what you want to say or feel. This is the same for reading.
Writing also helps to clear your head, whether you are journaling about your day-to-day life, or writing articles on the medium. Writing is a good way to get what’s in your head out.
One of the many benefits of writing is you can go back and read things you’ve written, and see what your mindset was at the time. Most people can’t remember what they had for dinner 2 days ago, how are you supposed to remember what you have going on in your head a few weeks from now? Write it down.
Make notes, keep logs, write down what’s important and get what’s in your head out on paper. Even if once a week, you sit down for 20 mins and get everything which is in your head out on paper, then immediately throw it away you will feel a lot better. Think of it as a mental clean-up. You’d be surprised how long you can keep writing once you start getting your thoughts out.
I journal daily in bullet points (which has improved my memory), I also write down information that I think is important to me (which I can reference back to later), I write quotes I hear that resonate with me (which can give new perspective late down the line). Each type of writing comes with different benefits. Find what type you like and get started.
Speaking –
Speaking is the most crucial part of becoming more articulate. It’s the way you communicate everything you’ve learned, everything you want to say and everything you want to know.
When speaking, speak slowly. Don’t speak so fast that you’re stumbling over your words so that no one can understand you. If you speak too fast, people won’t remember what you say and will struggle to take it in.
Speak clearly, everyone needs to hear what you’re saying. Don’t mumble your words. This doesn’t mean shouting; however, you have to speak firmly in a clear tone. Pronounce words properly, don’t slur your words.
Avoid verbal hiccups. Break the habit of speaking with “um” and “ah” in your arsenal of words. If, when talking to others you use um’s and ah’s when thinking about what to say, stop. Instead, just become silent. If every time you had to think of what you had to say you went silent, people would take you as a more articulate person subconsciously, as it looks as if you’re thinking, not struggling to find the words to finish your sentence.
Verbal hiccups are a habit which has been carried on since childhood which your brain has been using subconsciously to fill the awkward silence while thinking about what you had to say. Filling the silence will random sounds make it look as if you are unconfident and like you can’t think, it makes you look slow. Building your confidence can help reduce this.
Know what you want to say. When you know what you want to say, you reduce the number of verbal hiccups in your sentence. You don’t have to think of and know everything you want to say, you just need to know the objective. For example, when asking for something, you don’t have to flesh out the whole question in your mind, just know what you want to ask for. Speak with a purpose.
Remember, these bad habits you have built up can all be broken. They are not a set way of life. I used to talk with um’s and ah’s, It’s just a habit that has to be broken. Yes, it will take time, however, the benefits of having great communication skills far outweigh the pain of breaking a bad habit.
Thank you for taking the time to read my article. If you found it helpful and think someone else could find it helpful too, please share it and 👏🏽👏🏽.
I write mainly on self-development. I occasionally write on personal experiences, interest and other topics too. If you are interested in self-development, then please read some of my other articles (linked below). Enjoy.
