I’m a Zero-Waste Minimalist (But My Husband Isn’t)
This is how we make it work
The terms minimalism and zero waste have come into focus in the past few years due to a reignited interest in climate change, as well as pop culture phenomena, like Marie Kondo and The Minimalists.
In the spirit of being completely honest: If you asked me ten years ago what minimalism or zero waste was, I would have been clueless. But while those labels meant nothing to me, I did live by those ideals.
But it’s one thing to be zero waste or a minimalist when single. It seems like most zero-waste bloggers are unburdened by marriages, kids, and mortgages.
So what do you do when you’re trying your darndest to lessen your impact on the environment, but your significant other isn’t *as* onboard?
You learn to communicate, try out some zero-waste swaps you’re both comfortable with, and learn that it’s not about being perfect.
My husband isn’t a zero-waste minimalist — and that’s ok.
This is how we make it work.
Trial & Error (and Communication)
When I got pregnant, one of the first things I felt strongly about was using cloth diapers instead of disposables.
After researching parenting and cloth diaper blogs — yes, they do exist — I sat down with my husband and shared the information I had found about their decreased environmental impact, cleaning process, and the money we could save. That last bit? The money-saving part? That’s where he was easily convinced. We’re a year and a half into our cloth diaper journey and haven’t looked back.
The key was communicating with each other.
I wanted something unconventional that followed my zero-waste principles, and after educating ourselves, my husband was down.
On the flip side, my plan to convert to natural toothpaste was a dud. We weren’t sure how healthy it would be for our teeth, and its grainy, brown texture took a lot of getting used to. After we made it through the initial jar I bought, my husband — very politely — made it clear he wanted to switch back.
Not all of my minimalist and zero-waste ideas are successful. But the point is we talk to each other and make changes we can both agree on.
We respect each other’s boundaries.
I know my limits. I know my husband’s limits. And I know the zero-waste swaps he might entertain versus the ones I dare not mention. (Reusable toilet paper is a non-starter.)
Since going on my minimalist journey, there have been several things I’ve happily given up.
Unless I absolutely have to, I don’t buy anything packaged in plastic. No candy, no pre-made meals, no soft drinks, and no snack foods — unless I find them packaged in glass or at the bulk store.
I also avoid splurge clothing purchases, buying what I need, when I need it.
The keyword in the above sentences is “I”.
I won’t obligate my husband to do the same. While he’s cut down on his unhealthy food buys for health reasons, he still enjoys chips, the occasional Dr. Pepper, and frozen pizzas. All packaged in, you guessed it…plastic.
Would I prefer he NOT buy those things? Of course. But my husband has a deep-seated love of chips, and no one is going to take that away from him. Certainly not me.
It’s not all or nothing
“We don’t need a handful of people doing zero waste perfectly. We need a million people doing it imperfectly.” -Anne Marie Bonneau
It’s an oft-quoted mantra in the zero-waste world by Zero Waste Chef, Anne Marie Bonneau, and I fully stand by it. I’ve told you, repeatedly that I’m a zero-waste minimalist, but I’m by no means a zero-waste minimalist all the time.
Our daughter’s daycare has requested disposable wipes instead of reusable ones. We buy sliced bread and tortillas that come in plastic bags because I don’t have a better solution (or time to make my own).
There are some battles I don’t have the energy to win right now.
So if I dare call myself zero waste while somewhat adhering to zero-waste principles, how can I expect my husband (who doesn’t share those same ideals) to be 100% on board?
Is my husband out to destroy the planet? No, he’s just not as gung ho about the idea of minimalism and zero waste as I am.
But, in his own way, he is on the path to a more sustainable lifestyle.
On his terms.
He’s using less plastic, eating more home-cooked meals, and has agreed to swap out disposable paper towels, sponges, and napkins for their reusable counterparts. And if that’s not the essence of Bonneau’s quote, then I don’t know what is.
Because it’s not all or nothing. There’s progress in something.
We do what we can
So how do we survive with differing views on sustainability?
We pick our battles.
We see which zero-waste swaps stick and which are a resounding fail.
But most importantly, being zero waste and a minimalist means having wiggle room — for yourself and the people around you.
