My New Year’s Resolution: Truly Connecting The Mind And Body
“Without mental health, there can be no true physical health.” -Dr. Brock Chisholm.
In August 2018, I took third place at the International Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu Federation (IBJJF) Masters (age 30 and above) World Championships; submitted an opponent with a toe hold at Fight 2 Win 84 (the foremost professional jiu-jitsu event), and took first place at the IBJJF Chicago Open in the span of 14 days. At Masters Worlds, I weighed in at 136 pounds. I was down nearly 70 pounds from the day I started training Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. I was, as the proverbial saying goes, in the best shape of my life. Or so I thought.
Two parallel events, which would have an extreme impact on my life, also took place in the summer of 2018. After six years of trying to conceive through in-vitro fertilization (IVF), my wife and I had a successful cycle that resulted in a viable pregnancy. Less than a month later, my father collapsed on a cross-country flight and I found out that he had been diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer.
At that point in my life, I was training jiu-jitsu six days a week. I was also working 80 hours a week as an attorney. I had begun working long hours in 2015 as a means to earn enough money to pay for our steep medical bills related to IVF. And not so coincidentally, I began training jiu-jitsu six days a week in 2015. In early 2015, I had recently been promoted to the rank of blue belt in jiu-jitsu, begun to show promise as a competitor, and had completely turned my physical fitness around by losing 50 pounds in less than a year. Jiu-jitsu was my sanctuary, my refuge, my therapy. All good things, right?
But, jiu-jitsu had also become my escape. It had become my way to cope. I sought it out when other problems in my life surfaced. For instance, I packed my gi during my last two trips to visit my father before he passed away. I needed jiu-jitsu. Jiu-jitsu had, in other words, become my latest addiction.
My father passed away on February 17, 2019, while my wife was eight-and-a-half months pregnant with our son. When I flew to California the following week for his funeral, I packed my gi but didn’t train. After the funeral, as my family sat down for dinner, I received a call that my wife’s water had broken. I flew to Chicago the next morning and finally met my son the next evening. And the next morning, with extreme emotions flooding my brain, I wanted to train, but couldn’t physically bring myself to the academy. My gi was with me wherever I went.
I was exhibiting classic drug-seeking behavior.
After experiencing two incredibly life-changing events simultaneously, I, with the help of my wife, decided to begin therapy to help me cope, understand my mental health, and help break generational curses that plagued my family. For forty years, I avoided conflict and tried to please people. For forty years, I told people that I merely had an “addictive personality.” For forty years, I played the role of Court Jester to cope with trauma and endear people to me. For forty years, I had engaged in drug-seeking behavior. It just so happened, that from 2014 until that February 2019, my drug was jiu-jitsu; albeit, a much healthier addiction than those of my past.
Jiu-jitsu had helped me improve my physical health greatly. But, it provided another escape for me to avoid addressing my urgent mental health issues. And, as Dr. Brock Chisholm (the first Director-General of the World Health Organization) once stated, “without mental health, there can be no true physical health.” It wasn’t until I started therapy that I began to understand the mind-body connection. And, by no means do I have it figured out. I simply have more tools now that I’ve sought professional mental health services.
And, yet, despite Dr. Chisholm’s directive nearly a half-century ago, our society seems hyper-focused on physical health concerns while generally ignoring or stigmatizing mental health concerns. Every year, Americans spend roughly 33 billion dollars on diet and weight loss products. Between the healthy eating and nutrition and personalized health market, Americans spend roughly 520 billion dollars a year. (www.marketwatch.com, January 21, 2018). Contrast that with the 225 billion dollars Americans spent on mental health services in 2019 and you begin to see a problem. And, to give greater context, the 225 billion dollars spent in 2019 represents a 52 percent increase in spending from 2009. In other words, as recently as 10 years ago, Americans were spending four times as much on their physical health than their mental health.
The mind and the body are inextricably linked; as are the outcomes for mental health and physical health. Approximately 50 percent of cancer patients suffer from depression and anxiety. Treatment for mental health among cancer patients can improve survival time. People suffering from anxiety are twice as likely to have a heart attack. And treatment for depression lowers the mortality and re-hospitalization rates. (Source: World Health Organization). People with mental illnesses have a life expectancy of 20 years lower than those without mental health illnesses.
In August 2018, I may have looked like I was at the peak of health. But, I wasn’t. I was still engaging in the same behaviors that had taken me down a path of self-destruction only 5 years prior. I had just replaced one addiction for another. I had never once considered how my mental health was part of why my physical health had worsened over time. Luckily, I began seeking mental health services and now understand that any New Year’s Resolution MUST include my mental health.
Be well, my friends.
