Since I arrived here almost ten years ago, I always remember spending long summers out by the lake and forest and saying to myself “I’m going to live here one day” and now, ten years later, I find myself in the middle of what can only be described as a dream.
The Forest is many things for me, a place to hide, a place to show myself, a place to experience the endless rounds of emotional waves that currently pass through my body in just the same way the wind passes through the tops of the trees.
The Forest is a place where I can lose everything, including myself and the heartbreaking conflict my mind presents to me, even just for a few moments. I have achieved a dream, a dream that came about purely by circumstance and consequence but this dream has changed my entire perception on what it means to be alive and I feel it somewhat fitting that I should close my final moments in this city, out here, next to lake I always wanted to live next by and just on the edge of the forest, that forest.
This place is almost a thousand years old, as you walk deeper and deeper inside, life blooms, Owls, Deer, always watching, eyes always on my movements, but this does not intimidate me, it fills me with a sense of childlike wonder to go deeper, a curiosity to explore.
There is a place, the journey is two hours deep into the forest. Many winding paths to take but only one leads to that place. There live a family of Deer and I sit just on the edge of their home. There is a tree that has fallen, it must be hundreds of years old. I climb above the broken part and I lay, I watch the family of Deer simply exist and I wonder what reality is for them, it is not the way I perceive reality, they do not need the trials of human existence and yet they are in some way effected by us, life for them is simply, nuclear, a family, a home, simplicity.
As the sun begins to set, I lay on that tree, look up and I watch the day fade away into nothing. As darkness falls, the forest becomes even more alive, the sound, the smell, the activity, it changes, reality once again shifts and becomes a new world and as I peer up and watch the formation of thousands upon thousands of stars, I notice only one. She’s red, she passes by so slowly, but always at the same time. I look up at that red dot, I watch it pass by and all I can wonder is, are you looking at the same little red planet that I am? even though our lives have taken different paths, I wonder, do we ever share the same moments?