Whew! Your Lesson Plan on Resilience
Parents, however you’re getting through school at home, A+
After a month of supporting friends through schooling at home while navigating my teaching job and three kids as a single parent myself, I have these loving thoughts for anyone handling their child’s education at home.
Parents, YOU are your child’s greatest teacher. You are the most qualified expert on your child.
And now, you have earned your credential in survival. Well done.
Whether you realize it or not, your children are watching and learning from you no matter what you do. And right now, you are teaching your child the single most important lesson they will need for the rest of their lives.
You are teaching your child how to handle crisis.
I have come to believe that nobody gets out of this life without having to face at least one unexpected, tragic, life wallop. And when that happens, resilience, that innate trust that you can figure it out even if you don’t yet know how, is the one thing you need to get you through life.
When I was going through a personal crisis, there were days that I felt like a total failure both as a parent and a teacher. As a human, even. But even in the times that I missed work deadlines, left my three kids to make their own mac and cheese, and went to bed before they did, I knew that what I wanted for myself and for them was to look back at that time and say that I did the best I could, that I handled it with the most grace I could muster.
I survived. I made it through to thrive again. And along the way, I showed my children what it looks like to get stuck in the muck and keep pushing forward anyway.
I taught them, and maybe even more importantly, myself, that we humans are built for hard times.
All those qualities I hoped for my babies when they were born — intelligence, kindness, creativity, talent — those all became secondary to the one thing I now wished for them. Resilience.
So whatever you did to survive this past month, whatever you do in the coming weeks while your child is at home, rest assured you are, indeed, teaching them the most valuable lessons that will carry them through life.
Even if you never touch a school assignment.
Math and language arts and art and history and social studies and P.E. and science and all the important core school subjects that are so crucial to being well-informed citizens and getting good jobs? Those have taken a back seat for now.
If you cried out of fear or uncertainty, you are teaching them it’s okay to show your emotions.
If you got frustrated or lost your cool, you are teaching them it’s okay not to be perfect.
If you let them have too much screen time while you got work done, you are teaching them work dedication.
If you let them eat crap, you are teaching them they have choices, and sometimes the best one meets a short-term goal over a long-term one.
If you let them sleep in and stay in pajamas, you are teaching them the importance of rest.
If you let them fend for themselves, you are teaching them personal responsibility.
If you let them goof around, you are teaching them the importance of play.
If you sought out new resources, you are teaching and modeling life-long, adult learning.
If you took them outside instead of doing work, you are teaching them the importance of fresh air and exercise.
If you just let them read books, you are teaching them that reading is the only learning tool they really need.
If you scrapped your plans, you are teaching them flexibility.
If you checked on neighbors, you are teaching them kindness.
If you spent most of your time on social media and talking on the phone, you are teaching them the importance of connection.
If you had to do something a different way, you are teaching them creativity.
If you thanked a grocery store bagger, postal worker, nurse, or garbage collector, you are teaching them gratitude.
If you volunteered at a food bank or to help others in more dire circumstances, you are teaching them about privilege.
If you put on music, painted, wrote, sang, danced, cooked, you are teaching them the transcendent power of art.
And if you hugged them a little closer, kissed them a little more, you are teaching them that love is always present, especially in the most difficult times.
Great job, teachers. A+ on your Lesson Plan on Resilience.
P.S. I’m a credentialed California teacher and homeschooling parent. Stay healthy and keep up the good work.
