Who Are You Doing it For?

If you’re like me, you did it for your parents

Photo by Fey Marin on Unsplash

You weren’t supposed to be selfish. You had to share it all: your toys, your bed, your food, even the hugs you didn’t want to give to that uncle whose face scared you.

You did it for so long that you forgot how to say no.

You couldn’t say no when he asked you out. Or when she kissed you.

You couldn’t say no when they picked your career, saved money to you send out of the country, or connected you to that Aunty who knew the minister for the government job.

You never learned how to say no. But it didn’t mean you agreed.

It meant you said no to yourself. To your needs. Your desires. Your heart’s purpose. You couldn’t say no, so you lashed in. You became stubborn; you stopped cutting your hair.

Or worse, you didn’t even let the opportunity for the choice of no — you said yes to everything and everyone.

“If I only say yes, I never have to deal with what happens if I say no.”, you said.

By doing this, you paused your growth, buried yourself, and became a shadow — darker with everyone’s light, every else’s choice.

Everyone’s choice to say no but yours.