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Grief Changes Everything
But therapeutic memories soothe the tears
Just about the moment David died, I was discovering a very old song by The Byrds, off 1968's The Notorious Byrd Brothers album: “Change Is Now.”
The lyrics don’t offer profound insight other than to remind those of us who don’t handle change very easily that we simply have to. Change is neither “over there,” “back then,” or in “things to come.” Of course it is or was or will be or has been in all of those places. But if we don’t believe it’s our constant, too, then we are pretty doomed to miss how we grow and how we handle things like grief:
“Change is now, change is now
Things that seemed to be solid are not
In and out, roundabout,
Dance to the day when Fear, it is gone
Fear, it is gone
Fear, it is gone.”
The song itself combines those beautiful Byrd harmonies, the psychedelic sound of other big hits like “Eight Miles High,” and the country-rock shadows of what they would become shortly in Sweetheart of the Rodeo, including that gorgeous pedal steel guitar.
Now, about overcoming fear.
My mother, who passed in the summer of 2018, told me that she didn’t mind dying:
