I Let Go of My Fears About Money and It Flowed Into My Life
Money and I avoided each other until I confronted my darkest shadows
As far back as I can remember, I never gave money a lot of thought. I was too busy trying to survive the abuse of childhood and the fallout it created after I grew up. I was more concerned with avoiding numerous landmines — or cleaning up after them.
I suppose I might have given it more thought if anyone had ever mentioned it when I was a kid. But apart from the essentials of food, shelter, clothing and so on, I was pretty much left to raise myself. No one ever asked about my homework or showed any particular interest in helping me figure out my strengths or what I might want to do with my life after high school.
To be fair, my parents were busy doing battle with their own demons, and I usually got the brunt of it. Both of them had grown up in the Depression and had endured numerous disappointments and hardships. It was the foundation for the toxic and frightening environment in which I grew up.
My mother … well, let’s just say she made no bones about the fact that she never liked me from the day they adopted me. I’d been with my birth mother for a while before I was taken from her and put into foster care. Eventually, I was adopted at around 6 months…