My Boyfriend Is a Better Person Than I Am
He’s the good person — and I’m happy enough to be good for him
The moment I confessed my love to my boyfriend was the moment when I told him I could not be seeing him again.
I had just thrown away the pile of crumpled tissues that was slowly forming a molehill on my bedside table. I said to myself in the mirror, “You, lady, are going to tell him the truth. You are going to be a responsible person once in your adult life.”
I splashed cold water on my face and rubbed off the clumps of mascara still stuck on my eyelashes from the day before. I wandered to the living-room sofa with a newfound sense of purpose: For once, I am going to open Instagram to socially interact with someone.
I told him that although I found him charming — and that I may even fancy him — I didn’t want to lead him on because I couldn’t be in a relationship with anyone right now.
He asked why. I said that I’m going through things that I needed to sort out myself; I didn’t want to burden him with my issues. He asked if there was anything he could do to help — I said no, it has been like this for two years.
He texted, “Have you eaten?” And I just realized that the reason why I have been whimpering from stomach pain was because I was so used…