The Worst Part Isn’t the Sadness or the Grief

Why the second arrow always hurts more

Photo by Alexandros Dimitri Karantges on Unsplash

“You were embarrassed for feeling sad about the death of your cat. It’s painful enough to feel sad, but on top of it . . . to feel embarrassed for feeling, that is the killer.”

This short quote, taken from I Heart Huckabees, is a perfect example of what Buddhists call “the second arrow”.




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Danielle Loewen

Danielle Loewen

she/her | reader | queer feminist | recovering academic | body lover | gamer | poet & fabulist

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