The five change-agent roles (and why you should care)
This post comes straight from the heart, and I tried to write it with humility. Please read it with this in mind.
I think of myself and my peers as change-agents; we love to see things change for the better! Still, take any two coaches and, as the joke goes, you’ll find three different approaches.
I wrote this post in one soul-searching and exhausting day so that change-agents may perhaps better understand their current and possible position, and so people who seek change-agents might understand better how to find them and what to expect.
I wrote this to share my (disclaimer: entirely personal and subjective) vision of the different ways of being a change-agent or a coach.
Please join me in exploring the Change part and the Agent part of a change-agent, and in understanding the different stances and impacts that a change-agent can play in a change.
About Change
Things change all the time, you are a different person now than you were when you started reading this, and any change is guided by some intention.
As change agents, we focus on systemic change, yet any change is a systemic change, any change is a change in relations.
These relations can be between a company and its market/ competition, between different departments or teams, between team members, or even between a person and her/ himself.
About the role of a Change-Agent
Since the system changes all the time, it doesn’t need us to help it change, it already does it, and it did it for years.
It may need us to help it change for the better.
And as change agents, we would like (I hope) to help this change be for the better as well, to help drive the system to a higher harmony.
Before I go further, could you take a minute to think — what does “for the better” mean?
- Who defines “for the better” for you? Is it the person who hired you? Your sponsor? Your gut feeling? The “One Way Of Working” your organization advocates?
- How flexible is the definition of “better” for you? what may trigger it to change?
Regardless of your answer, please remember one thing:
Anytime we see the system that we are coaching, our view is limited and biased. No matter how broad our viewpoint is, we always see things from where we are.
Equipped with your answers, and this understanding, we are ready to start!
The five Change-Agent role archetypes
In my long journey, I’ve seen several sorts of change agents that I’d like to describe, understanding for each their intention/ motivation and the possible consequences of that intention.
I’ll call them the You-Should-er, the Savior, the Empathizer, the Reflector, and the Ascender. (any better suggestions are welcome! and thanks Marijn for this! ;)
Instructing as the You-Should-er
This person holds the educator/ teacher posture. A You-Should-er knows what people should do differently and see its role as moving people toward doing it.
This knowledge may come from different sources:
- From studies (you are a Product Owner; therefore you should have a backlog, this is what the Scrum-Guide says)
- From company policy (you should have an Obeya-room with four walls — since every tribe/ department here should have one, and here is a document showing how it should look)
- From experience (A Scrum Master should not be a team member, this is my experience, therefore — thou shalt not to do it!)
The You-should-ers usually enforces the change by their authority
This authority can take several forms: convincing, authoritative advice or even pure top-down power (such as defining it as the yearly goals of the person or team they are set-up to change)
Some of these people think of themselves as coaches, but they admit their main purpose is to instruct. I humbly think of them more as old-style school teachers — driving a well-intentioned top-down predefined change-plan.
Acting as the Savior
Some change agents act as saviors; as a sort of a Superman, I used to be one of those.
They see some flaw in the system, something that is broken — a pain, a hole, a disharmony, some injustice. They roll their sleeves and attempt to fix it, they act.
The flaw they address may be a bullying boss, an unclear goal, a lack of motivation, an inefficient process, people or departments that don’t talk or that have some misunderstanding.
The saviors act by jumping right into the fire and trying to fix the situation.
They organize a meeting, educate the bullying manager, go to the other department to explain the problem, write brave emails. They often act like Superman — jumping in front of a moving train to save the day.
They are (and if anyone, I should know…) often also the ones who find themselves out, finding out too late that the system doesn’t like a savior, that unlike the You-Shoulders (which some systems embrace), it rejects saviors when it can.
Moreover, once the savior has gone and the dust settles, the system most likely will return to its previous state, often rooted in its position even deeper.
Being as The empathizer
Empathy is the ability to feel how it is in another person’s shoes and see what they see from their current stance.
When you are empathic, you seldom give advice or tries to help, since you become (partially) the one in front of you.
Empathy is a state of being.
When the empathizer becomes that person or team, they start to feel and see new things, things that may have been hidden before:
- They may see how ineffective or irrelevant it may feel when you are being told to do something, how it may even raise resistance.
- They may feel how being saved -though it feels good — may keep you stuck in a victim mode.
Once they see the other person or team, the empathizer might choose to act as a you-shoulder or a savior, yet now this is a conscious choice and not a habit since they are aware of the impact this decision might have and don’t act automatically.
When the empathizers see the other, when becoming the other, they may see a path hidden from an outside observer. They may feel where the other’s pain lies, understand their needs and frustration, but also see new options ahead of them.
By empathizing, they connect to how it feels to be bullied by someone, but also feel the fears that block that person/ team from standing up to their bully.
Empathy is where (IMVeryHO) the real coaching stance starts. Before you are actively and consciously practicing empathy your reactions are automatic, and I’d urge you not to call what you do (as valuable as it is!) coaching.
You can call it teaching or mentoring or saving if you want (Hey! Here is a great idea! Why don’t people call themselves “Agile Savior” or “Agile Mentor”? It could save so much confusion…)
However, empathy is not enough! When you practice it long enough, you realize you can never see totally what the other sees or feel precisely what they do. hence you can’t instruct them or save them, since you may never be sure if they see, feel or fear what you feel they do. The only one who knows is the person/ team that is in front of you.
Hence you start to understand that acting from an empathic stance to either teach them or save someone has its drawbacks.
… Oh, you might think to yourself, if only they could teach or save themselves!
Mirroring as the Reflector
When you empathize, you may realize that the one in front of you has needs and pains and desires, as well as options that are visible to them. Unfortunately, you may also realize that you can’t see these as clearly as they can.
However, you may feel their vision or pain are not transparent or strong enough for them to choose a clear path and walk it.
Wouldn’t it be great to help them explore that vision, understand their possibilities? To examine their pain and see clearer?
Reflecting what you see, or being their mirror, you may say — “hey, I see a stain on your cheek”, or “your fly is undone”, or “you seem stressed”, or “did you notice you tap your foot?”
As non-judgmental as you may feel stating what you see, as empathic as you may be — these statements may be very intrusive! the person in front of you might feel judged, and even if they don’t they might feel over-exposed, hence — before acting as a reflector, before mirroring:
you must first get their permission!
You must be a welcome guest in their territory! Since you may touch the essence of who they are, and with no explicit and absolute permission you might do more harm than good!
Getting this permission allows you to explore and question their inner motives, ask what would happen if the furniture were arranged differently in their space.
If in the empathic approach you allowed yourself to see things, now you need permission to communicate these things to the coachee.
If empathy is feeling how it is to live in their space, mirroring allows you to say: “don’t you find the drapes clash with the carpeting?” or “this sofa feels so comfortable! Once one sits here would never want to get up!”. the empathizer may also question their choices, asking “why did you put the chair here?” or “why do you allow someone to force you to do what you don’t agree with?”
This, in turn, may help your coachees have a better dialog with themselves, be more aware of their pains, their aspirations, and the paths open for them.
You might not fully understand their answers, but you don’t have to! a mirror doesn’t understand who you are! You don’t have to see their territory as clear as they do, only to be able to help them see it clearer.
The person may tell you: “Personally — I don’t like this sofa, it is hard to get up from it”, or “I find the drapes and carpet look beautiful together”. They may also say: “I never noticed that, let me have a closer look”.
They may tell you — “I don’t feel forced at all” or “I choose to be forced because I feel that if I resist I risk my income source.”
Whatever answer they have, It is their answer, and it is the right and valid one even if you disagree with it.
The more you feel the desire to change your coachees, or you feel you know what’s best for them — the more your mirror will be tainted, dragging down your ability to help them help themselves as your reflecting powers degrade.
Hence to mirror your coachees, you have to have as minimal involvement in the outcome as possible. If your goal is to make them change the carpet — you are not a good mirror. If your goal is to make them complain about their boss or to resign — your mirror is tainted.
When acting as a mirror, your main goal is to help your coachees see their whereabouts and inner landscape with fresh and awake eyes. Your goal is to make space for any new insights they may have.
The ability to empathize, consciously and intentionally, and to reflect it with no bias — is where (in my opinion) coaching starts to be effective.
As a coach, you act as a Sherpa to their journey; you are accompanying them to where they want to go — making their path clear for them.
But wait, let’s go further!
Helping Elevate the viewpoint as the Ascender
This article was triggered by seeing a presentation from Peter Hawkins called Systemic Coaching — Delivering Value Beyond the Individual Client (press the link to see it).
Specifically, I was triggered when seeing the slide below:
You see, anyone we coach is a system, be it an organization, a department, a team, or a person.
And no one lives in a bubble, not a person, nor a team, nor a department or an organization.
- When a team feels bullied, is it able to raise its viewpoint? allowing it to see and understand the one who they feel bullies it? allowing them to empathize? And if not — can we support them in doing so?
- When there is no clear purpose, do the people understand why there is none? Do they understand (empathically) why their management doesn’t provide one? and if not — do they dare to ask?
When you are invited to coach someone, you are invited to their apartment; invited to share your perception, to mirror what you see.
As there is a lot to see and mirror, there is often a crucial part that is neglected — the outside world!
Can you mirror what they see outside the windows as well? Can you help your coachee be aware of its neighbors?
What if you coach your coachees to empathy, hence making them start their own coaching journey?
The Ascender sees the coachees, just like the Reflector, but is able to help the coachees look further away, invite the coachees to extend their vision and see the system around them.
The Ascender empathizes with all the systems/ people the coachee describes, with the bullying boss, with the indifferent HR, with the noisy Scrum-Master, with anyone the coachee sees and describes. the ascender helps the coachees see all these people/ system with empathetic eyes as well, to ask themselves why (for example) the boss is bullying them, is it a pressing deadline? is it a belief that they are lazy? is it a feeling their job is at risk?
(S)he helps elevate the viewpoint of the coachees, realize they are part of larger systems and understand the parts they play in them. This allows them to better change their parts in the systems to improve it, to achieve better harmony.
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A trivial example is a developer who doesn’t do QA (Quality Assurance) work and is not concerned by the fact the QA is drowning in work.
This creates some pressure points: a stressed and overworked QA who does a bad job, slower delivery with sub-optimal quality, more pressure from business, etc.
This, in turn, puts the company at risk, which impacts the developer’s job stability.
The Ascender may help this developer understand that these actions have larger consequences and put at risk the system, which in turn hurt risk the developer.
(Thanks, Evan, for asking me to clarify, I hope it is clearer ;)
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I believe most conflicts stem from misalignment, from lack of awareness and empathy.
This lack of awareness is not limited to self-awareness; it is also an awareness of the system.
As change agents, we can contribute to systemic awareness. We can help the system be aware of itself. Once a system is aware of itself, we can trust it to direct itself in a better direction.
…And when we get there, our job is done.
Epilogue (or — why should you care?)
- I wrote this article because of some people I met along the way, people who have good intentions but whom I feel act as teachers or saviors while calling themselves coaches.
- While searching for a job, I see many people who look for teachers or saviors but call for coaches. People who find a coaching stance inappropriate, who say their team needs someone to push it or teach it, that their team is not mature enough to be coached or that this is not the right time or approach.
These two facts make me feel sad, both due to the lack of trust that people in power sometimes have for their employees and due to the waste of energy.
None of that lack of trust is intentional — I am sure! It is often well rooted and has a long history. It takes a long time to heal.
The waste of energy, however — is easier to handle, since it is rooted in the misalignment of expectations, in the misunderstanding of what a change agent is — a misunderstanding on both sides.
I wrote this article as a call for action.
I wrote this so that coaches can better understand where they are, what they believe in, and where else they could be, to examine their motivation and posture.
Hence if you see yourself as a change agent, I would love you to understand what sort of change agent you are.
I also wrote it for the people seeking a change agent. If you are one, I’d invite you to define what sort of change agent you are looking for, and what for. what sort of mission lies ahead of you and what are the possible consequences of pursuing it.
I believe this may lead to much more effective transformations and save much frustration.
Please share this post with anyone who can find this useful in their journey.
The illustrations are taken from the “10 BULLS — KAKUAN”, a beautiful zen story you can find (among other places) here.
I thank you for reading such a long article and wish you peace.
Post-epilogue
This article keeps on writing itself. Since I published it I received wonderful feedback and clarification requests, I am grateful for the friends who gave and keep on giving me their gentle and sharp eye! and a special thank-you to Marijn, you are the best writing partner I met to date.
I’ve taken two weeks to respond to some of the issues raised in the comments.
