12 Things To Do After a Breakup

If you are a 20 something and if you are indeed reading this, then we are more or less, already on the same page. We have all undergone the agony of facing a rather inimical social media world after a breakup. To unfriend or not to unfriend is the real question. And the battle doesn’t even end at Facebook or Instagram, and that just plain sucks!

And the times you are not over it? What then? You want to closet stalk and send spies after the girl who is posting those videos of dogs on his Timeline. You want to throw darts at her face (picture I mean, I am not that nasty) and basically have his social and personal life well within your reach.

No. Move on! Don’t do things on a whim. Here is a hack list that helps getting over him slightly bearable. Mind you, they are in the order as they must be performed.

1. Hello, is it Beer you are looking for? That’s it. Get yourself a crate of beer or two bottles of wine. Sit all by yourself and drink all night long. Basically chug or gulp it up until you have absolutely no idea what you are doing. Losing track of your senses is more than conducive to heal a heart that just doesn’t listen!

2. Don’t drunk dial/text him: DON’T. JUST DON’T.

3. Ask yourself out to a date. Do your fantasy date but alone. Dress yourself up in those knee high boots and that gorgeous red dress and go for a candlelight dinner by the lake. Treat yourself to some absolutely amazing alone time. Don’t you dare forget dessert.

4. Let’s go Binge-ing! Eat like your goldfish’s life depends on it! Don’t give two rats ass about weight and what nots, just you go buy yourself that whole tub of choco-chip and mint ice cream and some more wine to wash it all down with. Get a jumbo burrito bowl with extra meat and extra guacamole and three helpings of cheese and go nuts. Nothing heals the heart like food does!

5. Ask your girls out on a date or a trip! I personally believe there is nothing my girls cannot fix! The simple calmness in the neighbourhood gossip that is doled out relentlessly is such therapy, that I tend to sit in Pranayama, shut my eyes and feel the power of zen drawing me closer and closer to inner peace! Gossip-asana anyone?

6. Chop off that old story right at the base: Get a good makeover! Dye your hair or chop it off. Remember that woman with a mohawk you saw at the market and wondered if you’d ever have the nerve to do something that bold? Here’s your need to do it! Go outrageous. Hair changes don’t last long, regrets do!

7. Time up now, get the body back to shape. That’s enough chicken casseroles and cheesecakes to drown your sorrow in. Now hit the gym! Tone down, get that hot bod RIGHT NOW. Moving on feels so much easier when you feel like a goddess on the inside! Click some mind-blowing pictures of you working out and looking like a million bucks! #progresses #betterdaysarehere #sooverthats***. Let social media, and maybe that ex boyfriend (who probably stalks you too) go mad seeing it. Actually, don’t do it for that. Do it because, looking like a million bucks feels downright awesome!

8. Get him out of your social media world right about now. Especially as he has seen your makeover and is dying a little bit inside. Block his number, unfriend, unfollow, delete and what not him from all the spaces you shared. Including your house. Trash away his toothbrush and his PJs and his wannabe hip flask also!

9. Do meaningful things like starting a blog or visiting an animal shelter or helping at an orphanage. It will give you a lesson or two in being happy with what you have.

10. Goodbye boring, Hello Sexy! Do a wardrobe makeover. Yes! Get the oh-so-fabulous clothes out and channel the inner beauty. Dress to kill.

11. Don’t you dare deactivate your Facebook. Because you don’t have to! You are stronger than that lame photo update of his trip to see the Northern Lights (Northern Lights?! Seriously! Man. Sigh). Stay strong. STAY STRONG.

12. Say hello to your next mistake. Go on! Go meet new people, make contacts, make friends. You never know on which bend is your next love. It’s okay to be open to a dating app sometimes for the push! All the nice men are there too FYI.

Well, the truth is break ups are not easy. But letting them break you is even worse! So embrace the new you with that change. There is something horribly perfect and empowering about a powerful comeback after a devastating breakup. Take each day one at a time and go patch yourself back up to be stronger.

There is an age old Japanese practise called Kintsukuroi which literally means to repair with gold. It is the art of repairing broken pots with gold or silver lacquer and ‘understanding that the piece is now more beautiful for having been broken’.

Need I specify that you are more beautiful ‘broken and mended’?