Making Amends — A Two Way Street
The next best thing to having great food and wine is to be with the person you really want to be with. And when you get to that point, love and companionship take you places. Places that you never thought you’d see, places you never explored, places that scream ‘cloud nine’ a lot more than anything else and the other places that involve conflict and the aftermath. Unfortunately, relationships haven’t always been about finding the one true love and being together, it’s much more than that.
Relationships have always been a mix of a lot of things. As much as I’d love to say its sugar and spice and everything nice, it’s really about communication, peace, compromises, understanding, conflict and so much more. After the rosy phase of the relationship fades away, relationships can be taxing and often draining for the person. Think of it as plants, just like how you need to water a plant and keep it in an appropriate environment to ensure it’s growth, so do relationships. They undoubtedly require all the hard work, commitment, effort, patience, love, and understanding to survive.
Much like a two-way street, a relationship is made up of two people who have their own personalities and views. Values and opinions that could be polar opposites too, and that’s okay. Because hey, everyone is entitled to being themselves, right? Right.
Except, it creates a drift when there’s no acknowledgment or awareness of the differences that could exist between the two people. And that brings us to conflict. With so much going on, it’s obvious that there’ll be times when the couples can’t find a middle ground to agree on. And that’s where the problem lies, the point where most of us fail to keep up.
Conflict has never been an easy path to walk on. There’s a lot at stake and the situation gets tense every passing moment. It can be extremely distressing and can destabilise your entire relationship too. Some issues could be related to you as a person and can be extremely hard to accept or believe. Such situations can also cause a major stir of emotions and a major rift in communication and understanding. And that’s where it gets tricky.
And the question comes, ‘How do you overcome this?’ and that’s the beauty of being human and still having much room for improvement. It begins with a few simple changes in how you approach and deal with things in life.
The Two Way Street
Accept and acknowledge your own responsibilities and work towards it together. It’s the most important thing to address in conflicts and not everyone gets a second chance.
Stepping Shoes
Step into each other’s shoes to understand the other’s perspective. It’s easy to get blinded by the things you do and perceive, it’s always a bigger picture when you step out.
Escape Me Not
Try not to escape from situations and conflict, especially when your partner expects you to be there. It’s not fair to put the baggage on your partner, rather share and deal with it together.
Walk The Talk
Talk out anything that doesn’t sit right with you. Anything that is unsettling and doesn’t make you feel good. It’s time to address it.
Order, Order!
Have a supportive bond with your partner where you discuss to understand and not oppose. No reason to be impolite and mean, right?
The Talking Space
It’s important to give each other personal space and not have enmeshed boundaries that act as rigid barriers between the both of you.
Most importantly, conflicts are not roadblocks. They can be building blocks to your relationship. Being afraid of conflicts will only result in the pressure you put on your relationship. The key is not in avoiding conflict, it’s working through conflict. And when you do, your relationship will deepen and blossom into something more than it ever was!
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