Understanding Drizzy

A FIVE PART INVESTIGATION

Brought to you by the Champagne Papi Desk, a journalistic collaboration between Alana Zine, Medium, Propublica, The Center For Investigative Reporting, The Investigative Reporting Project and Reader’s Digest.

PART 1: Is Drake afraid to touch others?

It has been brought to our attention that Drake has a problem with closeness. Not emotional intimacy — which we all know he is amazing at. Aubrey’s issue is that he doesn’t like having his body touch other human beings.

This trend was first brought to light by a spate of troubling pics taken at the US Open, posted by Drake himself on Instagram. Here he is distancing himself from Novak Djokovic, despite the 🙏 :

Really? That’s the closest you will get to Jonny Mack?

Drake, this is not how you treat your “secret weapon”:

I don’t know who this is but she’s cute, what is your problem:

OK, you are getting better, but that’s fucking Nicki Minaj. COME ON:

You are a monster for being this near to Rhianna and not putting your arm around her: